


start me over

by camiii



Category: BBC Radio 1 RPF, One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alcohol, Anal Sex, Angst, Blow Jobs, Cats, Frottage, Hand Jobs, Happy Ending, Hate to Love, Kissing, M/M, OT5 Friendship, SO MUCH ALCOHOL, Semi-Public Sex, Vomiting, and boys being stupid because of it, at least that's what they tell themselves, travel rep!AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-09
Updated: 2017-06-09
Packaged: 2018-11-06 22:12:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 44,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11045385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/camiii/pseuds/camiii
Summary: "Nick’s funny when he’s not being a knob, and has good taste in music and Louis really likes his hands. Not to mention that he’s tall, tall enough to have made Louis spend a minute or two imagining what it would be like to have Nick pin him to a flat surface and snog him senseless. The only thing keeping him from a full grown crush at this point is sheer will and the threat of humiliation.So, Nick’s a dickhead but unfortunately Louis is kind of into that."





	start me over

**Author's Note:**

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> I can't believe I'm finally posting this fic. It's been two years since I started. TWO YEARS. I have never hated any WIP as much as I've hated this one but it's finally done. YAY.
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> So, I present to you 44k (HOW?) of travel!rep OT5 and bartender!Nick in Cyprus. aka the fic where Nick is a little broken and there are cats and lots of beer and a blink-and-you'll-miss-it-kiss between Harry and Louis, and Zayn being a good friend and boys being stupid and in love. All topped off with a happy ending because OF COURSE.
> 
> I need to thank a few people for making sharing this with you guys possible. First of all, [elsi_bee](http://elsi-bee.tumblr.com/), for being the world's best beta and putting SO MUCH thought and effort into beta'ing this for me. You've helped made it ten times better and I can't thank you enough but THANK YOU SO MUCH <333
> 
> And also [Chelle](http://aslowmotionaccident.tumblr.com/) for stepping in with a lifesaving, emergency britpicking. THANK YOU <33
> 
> Don't forget to check out Jo's AMAZING art [HERE](http://camiii.tumblr.com/post/161620658131). IT IS SO GORGEOUS AND I LOVE IT VERY MUCH A LOT.
> 
> Title borrowed from Years & Years - Ready for You (acoustic). There's a playlist for the fic [here](https://open.spotify.com/user/camiii802/playlist/10K2fQ2nEXTf6Cd7gwyjNt). While the fic is all Louis' POV, I feel like the playlist is where Nick gets to have his say, so give it a listen.  
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Louis wakes up feeling like he’s been sleeping inside a sauna. He’s starfished across the mattress, the covers pushed down onto the floor and his pillow pushed up against the wall above his head. His hair is sticking damply to his forehead, sweat pooling at the bottom of his spine. Grimacing, he turns off his alarm and stumbles out of bed before he has even opened his eyes properly. The air in the kitchen is cooler, but not cool enough, so he makes a U-turn and slips inside Zayn’s room without bothering to knock.

Blessedly cool air hits him the second he’s through the door and throws himself unceremoniously onto the lump visible underneath the covers. Because sleeping underneath the blankets is a thing you can do when your air conditioner works. Louis barely remembers what that feels like. If the repair guy doesn’t show up to fix his sadistic failure of an AC today he will throw things. Or cry.

He shuffles around, ending up on his back, nestled between Zayn and the wall, ignoring the muttering that is probably threatening Louis with bodily harm in early-morning-Zayn-speak. 

“Zayn, I’m dying.”

Zayn burrows deeper into his pillows, elbowing him in the ribs as he does. “What time is it?” He grumbles, sounding a bit more conscious but still keeping his face stubbornly hidden from view.

“Eight-ish?” Louis replies, pushing his fringe back and wiggling around to make himself more comfortable, Zayn’s elbow somehow still digging into his ribcage. He makes a face at the soppy state of his hair, knowing he’s going to have to shower before work.

“Oh fuck off, I don’t start ‘til nine thirty today, you dick.” Zayn growls, tugging angrily at the blankets.

“Oops,” Louis smirks, mood lifting now that he can slowly feel his body temperature returning to more human levels.

“Shh. Sleep.” Zayn sounds half-asleep already, mumbling into his pillow. Louis envies his ability to sleep through almost anything as much as he envies his air conditioner.

Stretching languidly, Louis spends a little while longer next to him in the blessed cool room before he climbs over Zayn and steps back out into the kitchen. The room is dim, the sun not yet high enough to reach through their kitchen window, and he pads across the cool tiles to put the kettle on before heading for the bathroom.

He showers quickly, preparing a cup of tea while still wrapped in his towel. Early morning is the only time of day when tea is possible and he won’t let the Cypriote summer get in the way of this part of his morning ritual.

Leaving the tea to steep, he can’t keep the frown off his face as he returns to his own room, sunlight streaming through the closed curtains; it really is unbearably hot. He finds a pair of the navy shorts that make up half his uniform on the floor and puts them on, smoothing his hands down his thighs to get rid of the wrinkles. He should probably do laundry soon, the weather ruining his plan to only waste time in the laundry room every other week or so. There’s a chair in the corner at the foot of his bed, covered in clothes, and he finds a uniform polo right on top. It doesn’t smell, luckily enough, and if there’s a stain of glitter glue at the bottom, surely no one’s going to notice.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

It’s already warm out when Louis skips down the stairs and walks around their house and out onto the street. Pushing his sunglasses further up his nose, he crosses the road with a cursory glance over his shoulder.

Protaras is a quiet town, and Louis loves it, wouldn’t trade it for the insanity of Ayia Napa for anything in the world. The reps there are always complaining about people being drunk idiots, constantly getting lost and getting arrested and not getting out of bed on time for check outs. Protaras gets mainly families and couples, coming to enjoy the beach stretching around Fig Tree Bay and to gorge themselves on the all inclusive buffets. It’s been almost four months now since he and Zayn both managed to land a transfer from Phuket to Cyprus, and while Louis enjoyed Thailand - the beaches and the people and the street food - this is better.

The hotel is only a few minutes’ walk, nestled on the outskirts of Protaras, facing the sea. He quickly makes his way through the lobby, waving at the reception staff before walking through the garden on his way to the office. There are people who have already finished with breakfast using the wooden stairs in the garden to step directly into the cerulean sea, but this early in the day most of the area is fairly empty, guests taking the opportunity to go wild at the breakfast buffet. Reaching the clubhouse he turns right, stepping into the small office. It’s not empty. Their head rep James is sat behind his desk, cursing enthusiastically at the computer in front of him.

“Morning,” Louis greets him, throwing his keys and phone onto the crowded desk next to James’ before reaching down to boot up the computer.

“Louis, good morning,” James replies, and it’s evident in his voice that he wants something. “You’re just the person I wanted to see.” 

Louis merely lifts an eyebrow, silently prompting James to continue as James keeps on desperately smashing the keyboard. “You’re getting new roommates at the house later today, I’m picking them up at the airport after lunch. Oh, for fuck’s sake.” He addresses the last part at the computer, leaning back in his chair as he returns his attention to Louis. “I trust you and Zayn to help them get settled.”

“Of course.” Louis replies, leaning over James’ shoulder to point out what he’s doing wrong. It’s always the same thing. They have even put a note up on the wall behind the computer screen reminding James of that very fact but he never remembers. “There.”

“You’re my favourite.” James sighs. “Don’t tell the others.”

“I know.” Louis chuckles, parking himself in front of the other computer and opening up the file he needs. They work quietly side by side, the peace only interrupted as James curses longsufferingly at the computer. The others start trickling in a while later; Zayn dressed up for service desk duty, and Laura picking up her papers for the day’s bus trip to the mountains. Liam and Katie are busy preparing for tomorrow’s arrivals, playfully arguing about who gets to greet the guests after customs and who has to stay outdoors in the parking lot, suffering in the afternoon sun. 

 

 

XOXO

 

 

Louis is shoving pot noodles into his mouth later that afternoon when James shows up with their new flatmates. The guy who will be staying in the room next to Louis’ is named Harry. 

Harry’s tall and seems to have the kind of personality that Louis thinks will mesh well with himself and Zayn. He’s quite nice to look at too. Louis is itching to reach out to see if Harry’s hair is as soft as it looks curling around his temples. The other guy, Niall is moving into the bigger flat downstairs with Liam and the girls. Louis and Zayn give them the grand tour, including the finicky buttons on their old washing machine and the backyard. The backyard is mostly brown grass and rickety plastic furniture, but there’s a barbecue and since it’s completely hidden from the road it’s still their favourite place for when they want to throw a proper house party.

Zayn has to leave after a while, due for another shift at the service desk. He gets ready in slow-motion, whining about having to change out of his cut off sweats and back into uniform. The newcomers leave to unpack and get settled in their rooms, while Louis Skypes his mum and spends a good fifteen minutes listening to his sister Lottie go on and on about what she wants for her birthday. When Liam comes home Louis drags Harry downstairs in search of Niall, and together all four of them head back out into the sweltering heat to do the grand tour of Protaras.

They walk slowly down the main street. It’s littered with restaurants, bars and small touristy shops selling beach towels, sunglasses and various trinkets no one would ever buy except for while on holiday. At least Louis has never seen anyone walk around Doncaster wearing a neon pink, tie-dye sarong with a fringed hem, but perhaps he hasn’t been paying enough attention.

Harry’s laughing at Niall who’s trying on a pair of neon, obviously fake Ray-Bans and Louis has a good feeling about both of them. Niall’s easy-going enthusiasm seems to go well with Harry’s more laidback attitude and to be honest, no one could possibly be a worse coworker than Calvin. Louis is forever grateful for Calvin’s inability to drink responsibly, since his third warning finally got him sent home a few weeks ago. Neither Harry or Niall have yet to make one derogatory comment about a girl, and they’ve walked past at least a dozen already, so Louis already feels like things are looking up. Harry will be joining him and the girls at the kids’ club, while Niall is set to join Zayn and Liam and the rest of the guides.

“Let’s go to Helia.” Liam suggests, as they’re nearing the end of the street, the McDonald’s glowing like a beacon further up the road.

“Let’s not.” Louis scoffs, even though he knows any attempts to object are fruitless. Helia isn’t, for reasons beyond Louis’ imagination, one of the bars they’re supposed to suggest to their guests if asked, and that’s one of the reasons it’s one of their more frequent hangouts. Andreas, the owner, is a good-humoured man in his late fifties with a definite soft spot for their group of twenty-somethings, and he’s constantly trying to sneak pints off their tab whenever they spend an evening there. The pub itself is great, not too big with walls covered in black and white pictures of the island, random football memorabilia and foreign banknotes. It’s got a couple of booths in the back, a big bar stretched along the right side and comfortable wicker furniture on the deck by the sidewalk. Andreas is a huge football fan and usually makes sure to show all the bigger games on the flat screen. He and Louis had their own bet going on several matches last season, a bet that Louis ended up winning and has yet to let Andreas forget about.

“Shut up, you like it here.” Liam replies offhandedly as he walks up the steps leading off the street. “... and maybe it’s Andreas working the bar today not-“

“Gentlemen!” A voice cuts through the sound of top 40 coming from the speakers inside the pub, and Louis couldn’t fight the eye roll if he tried. Of course, he used all of today’s luck when the repairman showed up to fix his AC earlier. It would have been worth one more night in sweltering heat if he could’ve avoided this. Because it’s not Andreas working but one Nicholas Grimshaw, insufferable hipster twat and bane of Louis’ existence.

“And Louis.” Nick adds, stepping out from behind the bar, pushing the end of a kitchen towel into his back pocket with practiced ease. Nick’s dressed in his usual combination of cut-off jeans shorts and garish shirt, quiff too high for common decency and honestly, is it really healthy to be using that much hairspray in this kind of heat?

“Hilarious, Grimshaw, really.” Louis deadpans, catching Harry’s confused look from the corner of his eye. “Have you considered a career in stand-up? Wittiness like that really shouldn’t go to waste.”

It’s a passable comeback at best, but Louis is not in the mood and more than ready for a pint or two and at least it’s something. Liam sighs, used to their barbs by now, and greets Nick with a laddy handshake before heading in the direction of one of the corner tables.

“Oh, you brought fresh meat.” Nick turns back to Louis, rubbing his hands together in glee even if his smile is kinder now, and Louis can literally feel his hackles rising. “Welcome to Helia, lads. What can I do for you?”

“You could go away?” Louis suggests, causing Harry to startle mid handshake and Niall to snicker nervously behind him.

“Lou!” Liam hollers from where he’s already stretched out across one of the sofas on the patio. “Be nice to the man providing us with alcohol, please. I’m thirsty.”

“He started it.” Louis calls back, even if he shares Liam’s need for a pint or two. He’s got high hopes for Gia working tonight too, back in the kitchen. She makes the best nachos he’s ever had and it’s close to dinner time.

“Well be the bigger person and don’t take the bait.” Liam calls back, clearly amused by their banter but trying not to show it.

“But he’s a bloody giant.” Louis replies, a little lower this time, turning to make sure Nick’s paying attention. 

Nick isn’t, simply slips behind the bar and starts pulling pints, and it makes Louis’ skin prickle. A drag that good deserves a response. Glaring, Louis reaches out to grab a handful of nuts from one of the bowls left on the bar top. He throws a peanut at Nick’s head, pleased when it lands perfectly in Nick’s ridiculous hair. Nick flips him off without ever taking his eyes off the pint in his hand.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

“So, you can tell me to fuck off if you want,” Niall says later on, leaning in to speak over the steady thumping of the music. More and more people have turned up to have a drink during the last couple of hours and the place is almost full. They’ve kept their table right outside the awning but it’s only Louis and Niall there at the moment; Liam is playing pool with Zayn and a few of the others who arrived a while ago, and Harry is over at the bar talking to Nick as he works. Both of them are laughing, looking at something on Nick’s phone. It’s uncanny, the way they seem to have immediately found each other. “But what’s the deal with you and… Nick, was it?”

Louis shrugs, feeling like it doesn’t quite come off as indifferent as he’d prefer it to. “He’s a dickhead.”

Niall laughs, swallowing down more of his beer. “Fair enough.” 

Louis doesn’t elaborate. Niall seems nice enough, but it’s not like he’s going to get into the details of his strange relationship with Nick on the first night. Truth is, he wouldn’t know how to explain it properly even if he wanted to. He doesn’t quite know what he did, but pretty much since the first night he spent at Helia with Nick behind the bar, Nick has been a complete dick to him.

Nick is funny and sharp and he talks to Zayn about obscure R&B artists and he gossips with Laura and Katie about the X-Factor. Louis has seen him make small talk and joke around with everyone from the beer delivery guy to drunk forty-something women. Louis is the only person in the world he seems to actively dislike, and apparently Louis doesn’t deal with that very well. So now they’re stuck in a state of mutual loathing where they ignore each other or throw thinly veiled insults at one another, and Louis doesn’t like the way it makes his skin feel too tight sometimes.

Most of all he’s all too aware of the fact that he fancies Nick a little. Nick’s funny when he’s not being a knob, and has good taste in music and Louis really likes his hands. Not to mention that he’s tall, tall enough to have made Louis spend a minute or two imagining what it would be to have Nick pin him to a flat surface and snog him senseless. The only thing keeping him from a full grown crush at this point is sheer will and the threat of humiliation.

So, Nick’s a dickhead but unfortunately Louis is kind of into that.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

The first day with a new group of guests is always a little chaotic. The first day of the kids’ club equals a morning spent checking names off lists, handing out hats and making a good impression on all the parents. Louis is in the middle of handing out permanent markers to parents to write their kids’ names on their hats, doing his very best to appear trustworthy, when a voice speaks up to his right.

“Excuse me?”

There’s a woman standing there, probably in her late thirties, blonde hair swept up into a ponytail. She has a girl hiding behind her legs, barely visible in the folds of her mother’s colourful sundress.

“Hiya, I’m Louis,” He offers her his hand, choosing to focus solely on her right now. “What can I do for you?”

“I’m Anna, and this is Sophie,” the woman replies, prompting the girl to dare a quick glance in Louis’ general direction before once more hiding her face in her mother’s dress. Anna drops a hand to brush through her daughter’s hair, tangling her fingers in light brown curls as she keeps talking. “Sophie is signed up, but she’s been having second thoughts this morning.” 

“Ah,” Louis replies, slipping the marker he’d been playing with into the pocket of his uniform shorts. “How come?”

“I explained to her that her brother, Theo, wouldn’t be in the same group as her before we left London, but I don’t think she quite realised what it meant until now,” Anna explains, looking down at her daughter with a fond expression on her face.

“Right,” Louis nods. He crouches down, studiously ignoring the quick look Sophie dares to throw in his direction and instead focusing on the gaggle of kids before them. “Did you meet Lola yesterday?” He continues, speaking of the club’s mascot, looking up for confirmation from Anna before glancing in Sophie’s direction. 

Katie spent a good hour inside the Lola costume yesterday, and then Louis was forced to listen to her complain about how hot and stuffy it was all night. She wasn’t wrong. The purple cow costume would be uncomfortably hot on a normal day, a summer day on Cyprus it’s close to unbearable. “She’s fun, isn’t she?” This time he gets a quick nod before Sophie hides her face again. “I think she might be coming round later to meet you lot.”

As he’d hoped, Sophie has been slowly coming out of hiding as he’s been talking. She’s still looking at him skeptically, hands twisted in her mum’s skirt. Oh well, Katie doesn’t call him the child whisperer for nothing. “Is Theo over there?” He asks, pointing in the direction of the group of older kids gathered around Laura, hats already on and itching to get started. Sophie nods, pointing to a boy who looks to be maybe eight years old. “I always wanted a brother,” Louis tells her, smiling. “But I got four baby sisters instead, and they’re okay too. Well, they’re not babies anymore, I guess, but I’m still the oldest.”

“Theo says I’m a baby.” Sophie speaks up for the first time, her voice surprisingly raspy for a four-year old. Her brow is slightly furrowed as she looks at him, clearly not pleased with her brother’s opinion. “I’m not. Elliott is.”

“Sophie has two brothers,” Anna explains, smiling softly at the way Sophie has eased her way out from behind her legs. “Elliott stayed behind with my husband today.”

“Elliott is too little.” Sophie explains sagely, and Louis can tell it’s something they’ve talked about more than once. “Only me and Theo and Lily can go.”

“Lily?”

“Sophie and Theo’s cousin Lily is also here,” Anna explains, pointing to a blonde little girl that is climbing Harry’s leg, laughing as he jokingly tries to shake her off while talking to someone Louis assumes is her dad.

“Oh, you know someone already,” Louis smiles, “lucky you.”

“Why?” Sophie asks, and Louis has to fight a smile at the puzzled tilt of her eyebrow.

“Well,” Louis shifts a little to ease the burning in his legs from crouching for so long. “I always get butterflies in my tummy on the first day.” He tells Sophie, not feeling bad at all about slightly exaggerating the truth. “There’s a lot of kids here I don’t know yet, yeah? And I think it’s gonna be lots of fun, but it’s still a little scary.”

Sophie’s watching him in rapt attention, and this is it. He’s pretty sure he’s got her. “Maybe you could introduce me to Lily?” Louis suggests, “Do you like stickers, maybe? There’s a huge crate of them inside and I think I saw a few really good Lola ones earlier.”

Sophie nods enthusiastically, and gets a few steps before throwing herself back against her mother’s side. Anna crouches down, wrapping her arms around her daughter’s shoulders. “I’ll be with Nan and Daddy right over there,” she explains, pointing to a set of sunbeds close by. “You go with Louis and Lucy, yeah? Maybe you can make a picture for Elliott?”

“What a great idea,” Louis idea, offering Sophie his hand and giving himself a mental high five when she carefully slips her hand into his. He responds to Anna’s grateful look with a small smile, “Ready, Sophie?”

 

 

XOXO

 

 

“And then she asked me to have the driver pull over immediately.” Liam is gesturing with his pint as he tells them a story of his latest guide experience. “She honestly expected me to have the bus stop so she could touch a ‘real Greek goat’.” Liam is laughing, scratching at the back of his neck because he might find the whole thing hilarious, but he’s still a little uncomfortable talking about guests behind their backs.

Louis snorts into his pint as Katie loses all composure and dissolves into a giggling heap against the table top, head buried in her arms and shoulders shaking as she laughs.

“We’re not even in Greece?” Liam continues, setting Katie off into another fit of giggles, and even causing Zayn to grin as he looks out over the busy bar.

“But you did, yeah, Payno?” Louis urges him on while Katie is busy trying to push herself into a more upright position, wiping tears off her cheeks as she does.

“Well,” Liam deadpans, downing the last of his beer before continuing. “I tried, of course, but Kostas refused to pull over. To be honest she was talking so loudly the whole time I think he was prepared to ditch her at one of the stops.”

Katie loses it laughing, once again, Louis and Zayn laughing along with her. Liam’s chuckling too, obviously pleased with having made them all laugh. Once they’ve managed to pull themselves together Liam and Laura leave their table in search of new drinks, pushing through the sea of people. It’s been a good night, like most nights; the air is warm and the beers are cold and Louis really, really likes his life. He can’t believe it’s only two more months before he’s back home again. Back in England and back at uni. A few of them are on their last runs as reps, and sooner rather than later they’ll probably reach the bittersweet stage of doing things for the last time. Luckily tonight is not about that. He sips his beer, letting his gaze travel over the busy bar. Niall is over by the pool table, putting the moves on Laura and from what Louis can tell it’s going well. Huh. It’s only been a week since him and Harry joined the gang, Niall works fast.

“Shit,” Zayn exclaims suddenly, a panicky note to his voice that immediately catches Louis’ full attention. There’s only ever one thing, or one person more like, that can have that effect on his best mate and quite frankly Louis finds the whole thing hilarious.

“She’s here, huh?”

“Shut up!” Zayn hisses, slouching as if he’s attempting to hide behind their empty pitcher. He’s attempting to discreetly fix his hair and tugging at his t-shirt.

“Mate, relax,” Louis says, and waves as Perrie looks their way. “She’s coming here.”

“I hate you so much,” Zayn grits out through his teeth, shuffling into an upright position but keeping his gaze firmly locked to the table.

“Hiya, love,” Louis turns to greet Perrie, getting to his feet and kissing her on the cheek. “I’m getting a refill, keep Zaynie here company for me, will you?”

He snickers to himself as he weaves through the crowded bar, looking over his shoulder just in time to see Perrie sit down in the post he vacated and Zayn nearly knocking his beer over as he frets. He finds Harry at the bar, checking his phone while he waits to be served. Nick’s not working tonight, and Louis tells himself he’s not disappointed by the fact. 

“Louis, hi.” Harry grins, accepting his drink from the bartender and slipping his phone into the pocket of his jeans. Louis has yet to discover what Harry is made of that enables him to wear tight, dark jeans in thirty degree heat without perishing, but Harry somehow manages to pull it off.

The bartender appears again and Louis is quick to ask her for a beer before she disappears to the other end of the bar. “Zayn’s talking to Perrie,” he says, eager to share the gossip with someone. “She works in one of the souvenir shops up the street.”

Harry looks over his shoulder to the corner where Zayn is still looking a little like a deer caught in headlights, but at least seems to be making conversation. “He likes her, doesn’t he?”

Louis nods, reaching into his back pocket to find money for his pint. “He’s totally gone on her but he’s not doing anything about it. With a face like that you’d think he’d do okay around girls, but he can barely string two sentences together whenever Perrie’s around.”

Harry smiles into his glass, angling his body so that he’s leaning against the bar on one arm. He is looking behind Louis, eyes searching and suddenly his whole face splits into a grin. “Look,” he nods in direction of something over Louis’ shoulder, and as Louis turns around he sees Niall, one hand holding his pool cue and the other wrapped around Laura’s waist as they kiss.

“Weheey,” Louis laughs, clinking his glass against Harry’s in a celebratory toast. “Nialler’s got game, huh?”

“Seems like it,” Harry is still grinning, shaking his head a little at the couple’s enthusiastic kissing. “What about you?”

Louis considers his options. He hopes there will be a day when a question like this won’t be cause to stop and think, but the rainbow hair tie around Harry’s wrist has him feeling like it’ll be okay this time. “Nah,” he shrugs, “not really my thing, girls.”

“A man after my own heart.” Harry smirks. Apparently Louis had been right about the hair tie and it’s making something in his chest twist warmly. It feels good knowing he’s not the only one in their group of mismatched Brits who appreciates a good rainbow.

“And cock, I suppose.” Louis winks, and Harry lets out a laugh so loud it catches the attention of at least a third of the crowd around them.

“That too.” Harry agrees eventually, still giggling as he signals the bartender. “Let’s do shots.”

They end up doing two shots each before taking Niall and Laura’s place in the pool tournament as the two of them disappear out the door. They lose spectacularly, Harry’s poor eye-hand coordination to blame for most of it, and the rest of their general suckiness to be blamed on the tequila. Harry, it turns out, is a clingy drunk when he’s not holding himself back, draping himself all over Louis as Louis tries to focus on the game. It’s nice, though. Harry smells rich and spicy and Louis likes the way his hands feel so big as they curve around Louis’ waist. Their opponents head off once they’ve finished celebrating their win, and Louis is leaning back against the pool table as Harry comes ambling up to him, pint in hand.

“Hey,” Harry drawls out, sipping his drink. There’s a flush to his cheeks, hair curling damply at his temples and Louis really wants to kiss him. It’s been too long since he had the opportunity to kiss anyone. A drunken snog a couple of months ago, when they’d made the effort of taking a taxi to Ayia Napa for an evening of clubbing. They shouldn’t, he knows that much. Casual sex between coworkers is far from uncommon but in his first couple of months he’s seen his fair share of hook-ups gone bad. Not to mention that he’d really like to have Harry around as a friend, but -

Louis takes a swig of his beer, stepping a little closer so that he’s molded against Harry’s side. He has another sip of his beer and feels Harry’s fingers dance down his arm, his elbow. Leaving the empty bottle on the pool table he catches Harry staring at him, feels the attention as easily as the brush of fingertips against his skin, and it’s easy to lean into Harry’s body, twist so that they’re face to face. Louis licks his lips, watches Harry’s eyes drop to his mouth. Carefully, mindful of how they’re standing in the middle of the busy bar, Louis brings a hand to the back of Harry’s neck, pulling him down into a kiss. Harry’s lips are soft against his, and there’s a hint of tongue but all in all it’s… meh. 

“Huh,” Louis frowns, pulling away, hand still wrapped around Harry’s neck. 

“Yeah.” Harry replies, lips pursed in thought.

“I really thought that was gonna be hotter.”

Harry blinks. “Thanks,” he snorts, pushing a hand through his hair and dislodging Louis’ hand in the process.

“That’s not what I meant and you know it,” Louis says, exasperated, secretly praying Harry isn’t really offended. Harry’s fit, but that was probably one of the least exciting kisses Louis has ever had.

“I’m gonna go have a cry into my pint now.” Harry sniffs, managing to keep a straight face for a moment longer, but then his facade cracks and he’s chuckling quietly as he steps back, has a sip of beer, laughing harder when Louis slaps his shoulder. “Ow.”

“Be serious, Harold,” Louis demands, and suddenly feeling the effects of the tequila more prominently than before he lets himself crash face first into Harry’s chest, breathing in the mixed smell of warm boy and cologne. “Just think about all the boredom we could have cured with snogging, had this only turned out more fun. I’m pretty sure it would be more thrilling to kiss Zayn and, ew, no.”

“I’m sorry.” Harry laughs, wrapping both arms around Louis and hugging him tight. “‘s very disappointing, you’re right. More tequila?”

“More tequila.”

 

 

XOXO

 

 

“I am never drinking again.”

Louis is sprawled out on the enormous bean bags they keep in the clubhouse, face buried in the crook of his elbow. His head is pounding, sweat trickling down his back even though the air conditioner is on full blast and he feels sticky and extremely uncomfortable.

The room is finally, _blessedly_ quiet, the kids having been returned to their parents for the day. He still doesn’t understand how he survived the morning; it had involved the club’s theme song on repeat for at least ten minutes too long and lots of glitter. Louis is too hungover for glitter.

There’s a possibility he was still drunk when his alarm rang this morning. They can thank their lucky stars James isn’t around today or they might actually have gotten a warning because there is no way he wouldn’t have been able to tell. They may have fooled the parents and kept it together for the kids but James is seasoned in the game. Louis is sure he’s got a radar when it comes to hangovers.

Now they have two hours of nothing before they have to get up and pretend to be functioning human beings again and if he gets his way he won’t move an inch in that time. If he can bribe someone to bring him a Coke from the kitchen he could happily stay here for days. “Haz, are you breathing?” He flails around, hand brushing against a mop of curly hair.

“Mmph,” Harry groans, sounding half asleep already and Louis would leave him be if it wasn’t all Harry’s fault. They might have ended up celebrating being so blatantly not attracted to one another with more shots. Louis’ memory is a little fuzzy about the specifics.

“This is all your fault, you’re a horrible influence.” Louis groans, sluggishly making himself more comfortable. He tugs at Harry’s hair, ignoring the sound Harry makes that most resembles a sleepy kitten. Harry’s hair is soft under his fingertips, slipping like silk through his fingers as he scratches Harry’s scalp. There’s no response from Harry, only the sound of his slow, even breathing and Louis should take the opportunity to get retribution for last night, but he’s too relaxed to move.

He’s woken up an hour later by Niall throwing himself on top of the two of them, deaf to their cries of protest.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

McDonald’s is busy despite the late hour, more than half the tables occupied and several people in line waiting to order. Louis is trying to defend the last of his chips from Harry’s sneaky attempts of theft. It’s almost midnight. They’ve spent their evening working the club’s Backwards Dinner party, an event that held very little eating on their part. The majority of their time was spent catering to the kids and making sure not too many plates of Bolognese ended up on the floor. 

They’d gone straight home afterwards, spending a couple of hours playing FIFA until Harry started complaining about being absolutely starving. Their fridge had been empty and even though you could technically find a grocery store open at eleven o’clock at night they had both been too lazy.

Pulling his tray out of reach of Harry, Louis ends up almost sitting pressed up against the windows when a taxi stops outside. It’s a minibus, a whole group of people filtering out of its backseat. Louis is absentmindedly watching their drunken stumbling as he sips his Coke when Nick appears. He’s the last one out of the taxi, dressed in another unbuttoned, floral monstrosity of a shirt and yellow shorts.

“Is that Nick?” Harry says, sneaking a chip from Louis’ tray and honestly, Louis might stab him with a straw before the night is over.

“Yeah.” He replies, reaching for his cup without taking his eyes off the group outside. He doesn’t recognise any of them except for Nick. They look like tourists, more than a few of them obviously sunburned from a day at the beach.

Nick’s obviously shitfaced, hanging off of one of the others, a burly guy in a pink vest with an arm wrapped around Nick’s waist. Something curls in Louis stomach at the sight. The two of them are stumbling around in a badly coordinated dance until they almost crash into a stone bench. They end up with Nick sprawled on his back, hand wrapped around the other man’s neck as they kiss. Louis watches the rest of the group head towards the door, calling out for Nick and Pink Vest. The latter gets to his feet, swaying a little before ambling up to his friends.

The volume immediately reaches a new level as they enter and Harry rolls his eyes when their accents make it obvious they’re all English. They both turn their attention back to Nick and Louis can see Harry frown at the sight from the corner of his eye. Nick is slowly pushing himself into an upright position on the bench, head bowed down. It doesn’t look like he’s about to follow his friends anytime soon.

“He doesn’t look that great.” Harry says, wiping his fingers on a napkin as he speaks.

They watch the group ordering their food, and Louis finds himself waiting for Pink Vest to go back outside, for someone to remember Nick’s not with them. No one does, and he and Harry are left watching them raucously make their way over to a table.

“Maybe we should go check on him.” Harry says eventually, wiping his fingers on a napkin and dropping it on the tray.

Louis agrees. The food sits heavy in his stomach now, suddenly feeling too much, and he pushes the tray away with a frown. Getting to his feet he reaches for the last of his Coke, clutching the cup in one hand as he watches Harry dutifully bring their trays over to the bins by the door.

The air outside is always shockingly warm when you’re stepping out from an air-conditioned space, and tonight is no different. Louis breathes in deeply, the smell of frying oil wafting from the restaurant’s ventilation and blending with the smell of the sea and the still hot asphalt. Music from several bars close by are blending with the cries of drunken tourists further down the street and all together it’s messy and loud and perfect.

“Look who’s here.” Nick drawls out as they approach. He’s managed to get back into an upright position, and tilts his head back to level them both with an unfocused stare.

“Hi, Nick,” Harry replies quietly, sitting down next to Nick on the bench and carefully knocking their shoulders together. “You good?”

Nick looks at him for a second before he replies. “Splendid, young Harold, ‘s only a little…” He trails off, waving a hand around to accentuate what he’s saying. “Spinny.”

Louis hovers next to the bench, free hand shoved deep into the pockets of his shorts. He’s not sure what he’s doing there, he and Nick are not friends or even friendly. Nick looks worn out and too loose around the edges, like he’s barely held together. It makes Louis feel like an intruder, like he’s forcing himself into a situation where he’s not welcome.

Nick’s nodding along to the music pulsing through the air, coming from one of the clubs close by. But then he stills, suddenly looking right at Louis. “Lewis.” He drawls out the name, sprawling further on the bench, and despite his own second thoughts Louis can feel his hackles rising at Nick’s tone.

“You’re a right mess, Grim.” Louis scoffs, making sure to put enough disdain into his voice to mask his own awkwardness, but offers Nick the remainder of his drink with the hopes of getting some non-alcoholic liquid into his system. He nearly breathes a sigh of relief when Nick accepts, wouldn’t have been surprised if Nick had refused the offer.

Harry levels him with a glare, but Nick only nods, talking around the straw when he speaks up again. “I’m a mess, me. Proper fucked in the head.”

The guilt is immediate, cold and unyielding. Nick’s not joking, he can tell, and without a snarky response his comment is way past the line they usually tip toe around. “That’s not-“

“No, it’s all good. So good.” Nick interrupts him, “Great.”

“Who are they?” Louis changes the subject with a nod in the direction of the group inside McDonald’s, feeling thrown off kilter by the lack of their usual banter.

“Oh, you know,” Nick shrugs, pausing to have another sip of Coke before he continues. “Friends...friendly, acquaintances.”

“Some friends,” Louis scoffs before he can stop himself, immediately wishing he could take it back. Nick laughs, but it’s not the right kind of laugh that makes his face go all crinkly. It’s a fake one that makes Louis want to reach out and shake him.

“They’re good fun,” Nick replies, pushing a hand through his quiff and drawing Louis’ attention to the bite mark someone has left down low on his throat.

“They don’t even remember you’re out here.” He points out, and he knows it’s mean and none of his business, but something about the way Nick allows himself to be so easily forgotten about doesn’t sit well with him at all.

“Are you going home, Nick?” Harry interjects, getting to his feet. “We’re leaving, we could walk with you?”

“Nah,” Nick replies eventually, still looking at Louis and Louis has to fight the urge to look away. 

“I don’t think I will. Lots of fun to be had, still.” Nick says and gets to his feet, stumbling as he struggles to find his balance and ends up wrapped around Harry, kissing the top of his head. “Be good, Harold.”

“You too.” Harry mumbles, frowning, and he doesn’t let go of Nick’s waist until he’s made sure the other has found his footing. “Text me tomorrow?”

“Absolutely.” Nick replies, kissing Harry on the forehead this time, before turning on his heel and heading for the door. He doesn’t spare another look in Louis’ direction. It’s not unexpected but it still makes Louis want to throw the empty paper cup Nick left on the bench after him. He watches Nick walk through the door, momentarily disappearing from view before they can see him over at the booth, the whole group raising their arms in cheer as they spot him. Louis doesn’t tear his gaze away until Harry bumps his shoulder into him gently, breaking him out of his spell.

“Let’s go home.” Harry’s frowning, clearly not keen on the idea himself but Louis nods.

“Yeah.” He agrees, returning Harry’s gesture and bumping their shoulders together. “You’re a good friend, Haz. Too bad you’ve chosen to befriend an utter and complete arse.”

Harry manages a smile but it’s dim and barely there, and they’re both unusually silent on their short walk home.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

Louis walks along the edge of the bigger pool, smiling at the guests who look up from their sunbeds when he walks by. He catches the eye of Sophie’s mum as she retrieves a camera from her colourful beach bag and struggles not to laugh, hoping she’ll get a good picture of what’s about to happen.

He can tell the kids are getting close, all attempts from them to hide their giggles are completely fruitless. He can hear Harry giggling too, knows he’s most likely bent nearly in half to get down to the kids’ level, tip-toeing in his neon trainers and preparing to help them push Louis into the pool. Laura is there too, inside the Lola costume, holding hands with a few of the more cautious kids. Louis reaches the spot they decided on earlier, slows down a little more and hears Harry’s whispered ‘now!” before he’s completely surrounded by screaming, laughing kids. Small hands wrap around his wrists, pushing at his waist and he flails, pretends to struggle before falling into the water with a scream worthy of an Academy Award.

The water is cool against his skin and he’s sure none of the kids will notice how he wasn’t wearing shoes in preparation for the ‘unexpected’ swim. He breaks the surface, spluttering dramatically and wiping the water from his eyes. “You little monsters!” He cries, wholly unable to keep the smile completely out of his voice. The kids are laughing wildly, talking over each other in their attempts to explain their devious scheming to him.

“It was Harry’s idea!” Sophie giggles, and jumps out of the way with a shriek as Harry makes a grab for her, mock-growling playfully.

“You,” Louis fastens Harry with a glare, feigning upset. “Explain yourself.”

“Sorry, Lou,” Harry chuckles, walking closer to the edge and offering Louis his hand. “I’m sorry. Here, let me help you.”

“Alright.” Louis shrugs, and winking to the kids standing closest to him, he accepts the hand only to pull hard and send Harry headfirst into the water. The kids absolutely lose it. Louis really, really likes his job.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

There’s a text from Zayn waiting for Louis when he has waved off the last couple of kids and slipped back inside the club house’s air conditioned space. _Party at the house tonight_ , it reads, and Louis immediately forgets all about how tired he is. It’s been too long since they had a proper party and with tomorrow being a departure day, it’s the perfect opportunity for everyone to let loose a little.

 _Cool, who’s going to the shops?_ , he replies and Zayn texts him back almost instantly. Apparently Niall and Katie have gone to the airport to pick up a bag that had gotten lost on the way from Manchester, and have taken the opportunity to do some proper food shopping.

“We need more puzzle books.” Harry says, busy tidying one of the tables and putting away the last of the books before closing the cupboard with a bang.

“We’re having a party tonight at the house.” Louis ignores him for now. There are more important conversations to be had than about who has to squeeze into their tiny storage room and search through the dozen nondescript boxes for the right materials. “Niall and Katie went shopping for booze in Larnaca. Everyone will be there.”

“Sounds fun.” Harry mumbles absentmindedly, trying to wipe glitter off his hands but only ending up spreading it all over his shorts. He better wash those separately or he’ll end up looking like a Christmas decoration, Louis knows this from experience. “Are you gonna try and snog me again? I’m just asking so I can prepare accordingly.” He’s joking, clearly fighting a smile but the dimple gives him away.

“Oh, fuck off,” Louis scoffs. He’s relieved they can joke about it but he’s blushing a little and when Harry starts laughing he retaliates by throwing a felt tip marker at Harry’s head.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

A few hours later Louis is fresh out of the shower, sipping his beer while he pretends to supervise as Niall works the grill. Katie’s pouring a pitcher of Margaritas into plastic glasses and Zayn is smoking and fretting about Perrie possibly dropping by later.

Dinner is a boisterous affair, all of them crowded around their rickety plastic table and talking over each other as they fill their plates with food. Katie’s Margaritas are approximately seventy-five percent alcohol and Louis has a feeling this evening will turn out to be one for the ages. He’s downing the last mouthfuls of his cocktail when he spots someone coming round the corner of the house and nearly chokes on his drink. It’s Nick, carrying a plastic bag with what looks like wine bottles, the posh bastard. 

“Nick!” Harry calls out happily, getting to his feet in an uncoordinated stumble that has Nick laughing as he walks up to their group. He’s so loud, always, and it gets on Louis’ nerves.

“What’s he doing here.” Louis mutters, stabbing at a leftover piece of potato with his fork.

“Be nice.” Zayn admonishes him, snickering. He’s well past the tipsy stage and nearly tumbles over when Louis elbows him not too gently. “Ow. Harry invited him, and besides, Nick’s cool.”

“He’s not.” Louis objects, watching as Nick makes his way around the table, kissing the girls on the cheek and receiving an enthusiastic hug from Niall. It doesn’t bother Louis how Nick doesn’t pay him much attention, it doesn’t. He could use another drink, though. Their eyes meet briefly before Nick’s attention turns towards Harry, who’s offering him a plate overflowing with food, and a seat between Harry and Laura on the bench.

Perrie and Jesy show up once they’ve finished work for the night, and demand shots in order to catch up with the rest of them. It turns into everyone joining in, even though most of them could probably have done without and, well, Louis is drunk. He’s making his way back outside, having used the loo in Liam and Niall’s apartment when he crashes into someone and sloshes beer all over his own wrist. “Oi,” he protests, stumbling a little as he moves to wipe the sticky liquid on his shorts. When he looks up he finds Nick frowning down at him.

“Had a little too much?” Nick smirks, but there’s no playfulness to it and Louis is so sick of Nick being a twat to him at any given chance.

“You’d know all about that, wouldn’t you?”

Nick only shrugs at that, for a second looking almost sheepish. It makes him look too soft and much too un-twatty for Louis’ drunk mind to handle and he really, really shouldn’t have had that last shot because this is dangerous ground. Without thinking he curls his sticky, beer damp hand around Nick’s cheek and swallows Nick’s quiet sound of surprise in a kiss. It’s a bad idea, but he doesn’t care until he registers the fact that Nick isn’t kissing him back. Fuck. “Sorry,” he mumbles, cheeks burning as he steps back, eager to put some space between the two of them, trying to make his escape. “Sorry, that was-“

He doesn’t get to finish the sentence before Nick grips his arm, hard, and before he’s even gotten a word out he’s pushed up against the laundry room door. Nick’s got a fierce look in his eyes, fingers digging into Louis’ hip, and Louis wants him.

He barely has time to consider whether he’s getting punched or not before Nick’s mouth is back on his, kissing him with urgency. It’s a brilliant kiss, making Louis’ toes curl inside his Vans and his stomach swoop. Moving on pure instinct he pushes up on his tiptoes, pulling Nick closer by the hip and deepening the kiss. He drops his drink in the process, the liquor splashing against his leg as the plastic glass hits the floor but he couldn’t care less, too busy licking his way inside Nick’s mouth to care about anything else. Nick tastes like the cigarette he was smoking earlier and it should be disgusting. Louis never wants to stop kissing him. His heart is hammering in his chest, head swimming and unless Nick has suddenly decided he doesn’t, in fact, hate Louis’ guts this is a bad idea. But fuck it if he’s going to let this opportunity pass him by.

The night air is hot around them, Nick’s hand even hotter as it slips underneath Louis’ t-shirt, fingers digging into his lower back. Louis arches into the touch, pushing his hips forward, aching for friction. He can feel Nick, growing hard against Louis’ hip and has to swallow down the moan threatening to escape him.

“Fuck, can I…” Nick pants, breath hot against Louis’ mouth, briefly resting their foreheads together. He still has a hand wrapped around Louis’ waist, grip almost too tight. “I have to-“

“Yeah,” Louis agrees, doesn’t let him finish the sentence, too preoccupied with brushing his lips along the edge of Nick’s jaw, feeling the stubble there, kissing his neck.

Nick shudders against him. “Yeah, just, come here-“

Unsteady, Louis manages to put enough space between himself and the door he’s leaning against to pull it open and slip inside, pulling Nick along with him. It is dark inside, the only light coming from the patio lights seeping through the open window. The others aren’t that far away and anybody who walks up close enough to the window would probably see them, but Louis can’t find it in himself to care about modesty. 

Nick backs him straight into the washing machine, it connects harshly with Louis’ lower back but instead of complaining he hops up and makes room for Nick to step between his legs. Nick crowds into his space, both his hands finding their position low on Louis’ back underneath his t-shirt, palms hot against his skin. Louis allows himself to be kissed breathless, wrapping his legs around Nick’s thighs to pull him closer still.

They both groan into the kiss as their hips brush together and shit, this is really happening. Aching to be closer, Louis squirms in Nick’s hold until they’re pressed together chest to chest, panting into each other’s mouths. He’s so hard, dick pushing against the fly of his shorts and he can feel Nick in a similar state against his thigh. It’s mind blowing, the idea that Nick might want him back like this. Needing a moment to get his breath back. Louis breaks the kiss, leaning in to taste the skin below Nick’s ear, kissing his throat, his collarbone, and chokes on a moan as Nick suddenly cups him through his shorts.

“Shh,” Nick hushes him quietly, breath hot against Louis’ ear. “Not so loud, love, or we’ll get an audience.”

Louis’ full body shiver is probably impossible to miss, and Nick laughs, breath puffing against Louis’ neck. Louis has to kiss him again simply to shut him up. It’s perhaps not his most thought through choice though, and he’s quickly forced to bite down on another moan as Nick’s hands travel lower, squeezing his arse. He’s so turned on he can barely feel his fingers and has to dig them into Nick’s upper arm to make sure they’re still attached to his hands. “Fuck, Nick-“

“Wanna suck you off,” Nick mumbles against his neck, hands moving to tug at the button on Louis’ shorts. “Wanna taste you.”

Louis can only nod, sliding a hand down the neckline of Nick’s shirt, clawing at his shoulders as Nick pulls his fly down. It’s a little awkward, a few seconds of shuffling before Louis finds himself with his shorts pulled down, arse bare against the cool top of the washing machine, and heart hammering in his chest as Nick’s hand wraps around his dick. He tries to keep quiet, a part of him not wanting to let Nick know how good it is, but there’s no stopping the whine that escapes him at the first twist of Nick’s wrist. 

There’s heat pooling low in his abdomen, simmering more with every stroke. The whimper is replaced by a bitten off moan as Nick finally leans down and puts his mouth on Louis’ dick and Louis jerks, accidently knocking a box of laundry detergent to the floor. He flails, not quite sure where to put his hands, and in the end he leaves one cramped around the edge of the washing machine, the other carefully resting on Nick’s shoulder. He wants to touch, find out what Nick’s skin would feel like under his fingertips, but fears the contact might somehow break the bubble they’re in. The one where Nick suddenly wants to be around him, wants to kiss him and get his mouth on Louis’ dick. It’s a good mouth, too, when it’s not used for snarky comments and insults. Nick’s swallowing him deep, hand covering what he can’t, and Louis is already fighting his orgasm. It’s been a while, but it’s not really an excuse. Mostly it’s Nick and Nick’s mouth and his _everything_. He might be the single most annoying person Louis has ever met but he has still managed to worm his way under Louis’ skin. Nick hums around his dick, teasing the head with his tongue and-

“Close.” Louis barely gets the warning out, digging his fingers hard into Nick’s shoulder. He expects Nick to pull away, finish him off with his hand, but Nick only hums again, picks up speed. Louis comes hard, collapsing forward as he shudders helplessly through his orgasm, heart pounding furiously in his chest. 

He takes a moment to try and get his breathing back under control. Nick’s leaning on one arm against Louis’ upper thigh, forehead buried in the crook of his elbow, wanking himself fast and hard. Louis can feel his breath, hot and hard, against his thigh, and slides his hand down Nick’s arm to pull him to a standing position. “Come here,” he says, frowning as Nick refuses to budge. “Nick.”

That’s when Nick comes, just like that, nearly pushing Louis backwards where he sits from the way his back arches and his arm digs into Louis’ leg. Louis watches, dick twitching in interest. It’s hot. Nick’s hot. 

Nick’s also very much not looking at him. He brushes his hand through Nick’s messed up quiff without thinking, suddenly eager to ease some of the tension he can see building in Nick’s shoulders. Reality comes sneaking back in, the sounds of the others outside, the smell of laundry in the muggy, dark room and the way his skin is sticking uncomfortably to the washing machine. Along with the reminder that all of this was probably a bad idea, but it’s hard to care with his limbs still tingling from his orgasm.

Nick stands up straight, dislodging Louis’ hold and pushing a hand through his hair as he breathes in deeply. He’s still not looking at Louis and it’s awkward, really awkward. They both startle at the sound of a door slamming shut and Niall yelling something unintelligible on the other side of the closed door. Tucking himself back inside his pants, Louis slides off the washing machine, crashing into Nick’s chest as his wobbly legs refuse to cooperate. He’s filthy, sweat beading at his temples and there are a few stains on his shorts that will fool no one still sober enough to look closely. “That was-“

Nick cuts him off with a kiss, licking his way into Louis’ mouth with surprising enthusiasm. Louis can taste himself on Nick’s tongue, kisses him back without thinking twice about it. Nick’s the one to break the kiss, stepping back and pulling at his shirt, zipping up his shorts.

“I need to go change.” Louis says, quietly, making a face at the state of his shorts. He’s going to have to do laundry tomorrow and he’s already dreading the experience. A part of him wishes Nick would say something, but an even bigger part already knows that he won’t. Stepping around Nick, he forces himself to walk out of the room without looking back. He doesn’t look to see if Nick has followed him but heads for his flat and manages to walk up the stairs without being seen. The crowd around the table is involved in what looks to be a intricate version of Ring of Fire. They have music playing from Zayn’s portable speakers and it’s loud, probably too loud, and it’s a good thing they don’t have neighbours close by. 

Their apartment is startlingly quiet in comparison, and Louis heaves out a sigh as he walks into his bedroom after a bathroom detour to piss and wash his hands. He manages to find a new pair of shorts to wear, leaving the stained ones in a heap on the floor. His head is swimming, knees still feeling like jelly. There’s a moment when he considers going to bed, standing in the middle of his room and feeling the effects of the alcohol more now than he has all night. In the end he decides against it, doesn’t want Nick to think he’s scared, so he walks back down the stairs and nearly runs straight into Niall. 

“Louis, mate, where’ve you been?” Niall’s accent thickens when he’s drunk, more Irish now than Louis has ever heard him. He accepts the friendly embrace as Niall throws an arm sideways over his shoulder, leaning into the touch a bit. He likes Niall. Niall doesn’t give him the best blowie of his life and then refuse to look at him afterwards.

“The loo.” Louis shrugs, carefully looking over Niall’s shoulder to where Nick’s managed to squeeze himself in between Harry and Katie on the bench. Their eyes meet as Nick takes a drink from the bottle he’s holding and Louis feels glued to the spot, swallowing dryly, but then Nick averts his gaze. Well, then.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

Departure day is rough. They get through it thanks to sheer force of will and lots and lots of caffeine. It’s probably a good thing they’re all looking a little worse for wear, or James would surely suspect something. Right now all of them looking like crap keeps anyone from standing out as particularly suspicious. Louis spends a good forty minutes inside the Lola costume interacting with the ecstatic kids and cursing his own height the whole time. Harry, who’s too tall to fit into the costume, looks comfortable and relaxed and Louis kind of wants to pinch him. Luckily for Harry, he brings Louis a Coke before he has even has time to finish plotting his revenge.

“Last night was fun.” Harry says, once the buses have left and they’re dealing with the last of the tidying up before arrivals. He’s got his head buried in the craft supply cupboard, taking inventory. They’re going to have to go search through the storeroom before going home and there’s no way Louis is doing that. Harry owes him.

“It was.” Louis agrees, ignoring the tiny voice at the back of his head reminding him of all the ways it had been ‘fun’. Nick hadn’t looked him at all once he’d come back downstairs, busying himself with the game the others had been playing. Louis had found a seat next to Zayn, and spent the rest of the evening making up for Nick’s distant behaviour by being loud enough for both of them.

“So, you and Nick?”

Louis nearly drops the box of crayons he’s holding, feeling like a deer caught in headlights as he looks over at Harry. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” He barely gets the words out, wishing he sounded a little bit more sure of himself.

“Yeah?” Harry’s looking at him and Louis has to fight the urge to squirm. “Because you both disappeared at the same time, and Nick came back with a love bite on his neck. And you changed your outfit. What was that about? Wait, don’t tell me.”

“I spilled my drink.”

“Right.” Harry chuckles, pushing a stray curl back underneath the scarf he has wrapped around his head. “I don’t believe you.”

Louis snaps, nearly throwing the box of crayons as he puts it back in its place. “Well that’s your fucking problem, isn’t it?”

“That’s not-” Harry’s face falls. “I didn’t mean to...I’m sorry. You’re right, it’s none of my business. I shouldn’t have brought it up but…” 

He looks so apologetic Louis has to fight the urge to hug him, even with embarrassment still burning in the pit of his stomach. He can’t help but wonder if Nick mentioned anything to Harry. Harry had been as drunk as the rest of them. Is he really that perceptive? “‘But’ what?”

“You like him, right?”

There it is. Louis can feel his shoulders drop, too tired and hungover to pretend Harry’s not at least a little right. “Nick can’t stand me.”

“I know you two don’t really get along but-”

“There’s no ‘but’. He hates me, so it doesn’t really matter what I think.” Louis cuts him off, and turning his back to Harry he begins to sort through their attendance sheets and the sign-ups for next week. There are a lot of kids coming, so they’re going to be busy. 

“Lou. Have you-”

“Will you check the storage for more hats? I don’t think we have enough out here for tomorrow.”

It’s silent for a beat, and Louis waits with baited breath, breathing out a sigh of relief when Harry doesn’t push the subject but heads for the storage room without another word.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

The bass drops and the whole room explodes in a blur of flickering, pulsating lights. The crowd’s cheers are loud enough to be heard over the music and Louis is very, very drunk. The lights are dizzying to the point of vertigo and Louis stumbles as he tries to make his way through the crowd, losing his balance just at the right moment, crashing shoulder first into the wall at the side of the dance floor. 

“Louis.” Zayn comes barrelling into his side, throwing an arm around Louis’ shoulder and nearly smacking him in the face in the process. “She’s here.”

It takes Louis a while to connect the dots, leaning into Zayn’s embrace. Right, Perrie. “What are you gonna do about it?” He has to lean in close to be heard over the music.

Zayn makes a frustrated gesture, wobbling where he stands. He looks so unsure Louis can’t help but press a wet smooch to Zayn’s cheek, not sure if he’s giving him a suggestion or trying to make him feel better.

“Lou,” Zayn whines, wiping his cheek exaggeratedly. “I don’t wanna snog you, mate, Perrie’s here.” He points out, very seriously, and it makes it all the more obvious that Zayn is just as wasted as Louis is.

They’re interrupted by Jesy, who shows up to drag a panicked looking Zayn back on the dancefloor. Louis would complain if he couldn’t see Perrie waiting behind Jesy, smiling at Zayn. 

He watches them for a moment, but deciding he needs some water he pushes away from the wall and makes his way towards the bar. It takes a while. He gets waylaid by Harry and Niall, who talk him into doing a shot of something that makes his throat burn and his eyes water. It’s a little less crowded over by the smaller of the two bars, and he sags against the bar top, asking the bartender for a glass of water when she comes over to his end.

The water is cold, almost too cold, but soothes his burning throat and Louis forces himself to drink all of it. It’s too much, stretches his stomach uncomfortably, and he pushes the glass away with a grimace once he’s done.

“Good night?” Someone speaks directly into his ear, and even through the steady thumping of the house music, Louis knows that voice.

He turns, absentmindedly noticing the way the room blurs at the edges. Nick looks good, great even, and the want that surges through Louis at the sight of him is a little overwhelming. It’s been four days since he saw Nick. Four days of getting himself off to the memory of Nick’s hands, his mouth, pretending it’s not Nick he’s thinking about.

“You’re here.”

“Stellar observation.” Nick drawls out, leaning back against the bar on his elbows as he looks out over the busy room. It gives Louis ample opportunity to admire the cut of Nick’s profile and the way his position makes his torso look even leaner. Louis can feel the bass of the music in the back of his throat, reverberating inside his ribcage and he _wants_ so much it makes him dizzy.

Making a decision, he wraps a hand around Nick’s wrist, and tugs him in direction of the loos. He expects Nick to protest, dig his heels in and refuse to follow, and is surprised when he doesn’t. There’s no one at the sinks when they walk in, and Louis pulls Nick along, pushing at the doors to find an unoccupied stall. Third time’s the charm and he slips inside, ignoring Nick’s sound of surprise when he drags him along. The door slams shut with a bang, and finally, _finally_.

He thinks Nick might be about to say something, so he gets on his tip-toes, pulling Nick down into a kiss. He might have a little trouble walking in a straight line at the moment but this, this he can do. Nick’s hand is on his waist, he can feel the heat of his palm through the fabric of his t-shirt. Nick suddenly slides his hand down roughly to grope Louis’ thigh, deepening the kiss. Louis feels like he might be vibrating, about to lift off the floor and float away, the only thing anchoring him to the ground being Nick’s hands on him, his tongue hot and slick against Louis’.

He reaches down to tug at the button on Nick’s jeans, struggling for a moment before managing to get it open and pull the zipper down. Acting on instinct he gets down on his knees, not caring about the dingy state of the floor. Nick’s not hard but getting there, dick pressing against his pants and Louis wants to put his mouth on him.

“Louis.”

“It’s my turn.” Louis replies, all but burying his face in Nick’s crotch as he struggles to pull Nick’s dark jeans down his thighs.

“You’re shitfaced.” Nick objects. Louis likes the tight grip Nick has around his shoulder, fingers digging into the bone, until Nick uses his grip to push Louis away.

“I‘m not.” Louis objects, lying. He’s drunk, very drunk, he knows he is. This wouldn’t feel like such a great idea if he wasn’t, but he also knows he won’t regret it in the morning and surely that should count? 

Nick inhales loudly, and Louis can see the way he’s clenching his hand into a fist at his side as if he’s trying not to touch Louis, and Louis doesn’t like that at all. He wants Nick to touch him, can feel his own dick twitch at the thought of Nick putting his hands on him. 

“I know what I’m doing.” He continues, stroking both hands up Nick’s thighs, fingers slipping under Nick’s pants to graze his thighs. 

“Yeah?” Nick grits out, and Louis practically melts into the touch when Nick cups his jaw, forcing Louis to look him in the eyes. 

Louis lets him look, feeling caught somewhere between nervous and excited in his position on the floor. A little flustered, he turns his head, catching Nick’s thumb between his teeth, curling his tongue around the tip and sucking hard before pulling off. “Are you gonna let me blow you or what, Grimshaw?” 

“Shit, okay.” Nick grinds out, inhaling shakily as Louis thumbs the soft skin where his thighs meets his hips, underneath his pants. “Yes.”

Nick might have been hesitant, but his dick never caught on, Louis notices. Nick’s hard. He leans in, mouthing at the shape of it through the cotton, grinning against the fabric when he hears Nick’s head hit the wall with a thud.

“Lock the door.” Louis mumbles, rubbing his palm against the growing bulge in front of him before reaching for the waistband of Nick’s pants. He can hear Nick twist the lock around, but he’s not really paying attention. He’s got more a pressing matter at hand.

Nick’s hot and hard against his palm as Louis wraps one hand around him, stroking roughly. He drags his lips up the side before going in, swallowing as much of Nick he can take in one go.

It’s easy to get a little overwhelmed by the feel and the taste of Nick against his tongue, stretching his mouth, but Louis forces himself to breathe in through his nose and powers on. He wants to make it good, make it something Nick won’t be able to forget easily. Nick curses quietly, one hand still gripping Louis’ shoulder, and it’s nice, grounding.

It takes him a little while, but he gets a rhythm going, covering what he can’t swallow with his hand. Nick’s breathing hard, trying to smother the sounds punching their way up his throat but failing miserably.

Louis is a little dizzy, definitely not remembering to breathe often enough, but barely notices by the time Nick’s abs start trembling under his palm. “I’m close.” Nick gasps out, the hand gripping Louis’ shoulder sliding from there to the back of his head, fingers carding through Louis’ sweat dampened hair, attempting to pull him backwards.

Louis ignores him, increasing his efforts into making this as good as he can, pleased when a twist of his wrist has Nick coming with a choked off moan. Louis manages to swallow most of it, has to pull off when he almost chokes and twists to spit into the toilet before pulling in a deep, shuddering breath. When he looks up at Nick, making a show of wiping his mouth, he finds Nick looking back with a look on his face that Louis can’t quite decipher.

Suddenly painfully aware of the way his knees are protesting his position on the floor, Louis makes a solid attempt at getting to his feet but doesn’t get very far. It’s not until Nick wraps both hands around his upper arms and pulls that he manages to rise. He crashes into Nick’s chest, face first, and stays there. His mouth tastes like come.

“There. All good.” He mumbles, reaching out to pat Nick’s cheek, but ends up patting his neck. He’s so tall. Nick’s saying something but Louis isn’t paying attention. His head is spinning and he’s tired. Liam said they’d go for gyros before going home but Louis doesn’t feel like it anymore.

It feels like a victory, being able to walk out of the stall without tripping and falling on his face. He ambles towards the door, pushing it open and wincing as the music attacks him from all sides. It’s suddenly overbearing. Nausea is dipping and swirling in his gut and Louis wants to leave. The wall is cool to the touch, and even when he leans back against it he still feels as if the whole room is spinning. He’s looking around, trying to spot a familiar face in the crowd when someone touches his upper arm. It’s Liam.

“You okay, mate?” Liam asks, or at least Louis thinks that’s what he says. It’s hard to tell, the music's too loud and everything a jumbled mess. The door to the loo swings open and nearly hits Liam in the back but he sidesteps it just in time. “Louis?”

Louis shakes his head, relieved when Liam wraps an arm around his waist.

“Let’s get you home, yeah?” Liam says, lips brushing against Louis’ ear as he speaks and Louis nods weakly, hiding his face in Liam’s t-shirt. 

“I’ve got him, mate, thanks.” Liam says then, and Louis frowns, confused.

“What?” He mumbles, but Liam doesn’t respond and he’s too dizzy to ask again.

He clings to Liam, stumbling along with closed eyes, trusting Liam to get him out of the club. It’s not as big a relief as he had hoped, finally being outside. The air is balmy, the sound of sirens echoing in the distance. Louis swallows hard, trying to breathe calmly through his nose. “Liam-”

“You gonna be sick?” 

Louis can only nod, barely making it to the side of the road before emptying the contents of his stomach. He retches and heaves, dimly aware of Liam’s hand on his shoulder. He struggles to breathe, eyes watering as his stomach cramps. 

He lets himself be dragged home, leaning heavily against Liam. He’s sick one more time before they make it to the house and he makes Liam stop for a breather, sitting on a low wall outside of a tiny supermarket. Once home he collapses in bed, barely aware of Liam pulling his shoes off and placing a bucket by his bed.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

A few days after Louis’ less than stellar night out, he’s walking back from the beach with Harry and Liam, having spent the last two hours kicking a ball around to burn off some energy. It’s well past midnight, but they had been too wired to go to bed at a decent hour. Louis looks right as they walk by Helia, eyes immediately drawn to Nick behind the bar. He’s busy wiping down the bar top, bopping his head along to the beat of whatever he’s listening to, but when he suddenly looks up their eyes meet. For a second feeling glued to the spot, Louis falters in his step. “Shit.”

“What?”

“I, uh, need to use the loo.” Louis lies, and he can tell from the look Harry’s giving him that he doesn’t believe him for a second. Harry looks over at Nick, and when he looks back at Louis, Louis knows that he’s made the connection. “I’ll slip into Helia. You go ahead and I’ll catch up.”

“We can wait, it’s no problem.” Liam argues.

“Nah,” Louis offers him a smile. “Better go get that beauty sleep, eh, Payno?”

He turns and heads back down the street before Liam can say anything else, turning left and walking up the steps to Helia.

Nick raises his brow in greeting before he turns around to rinse his hands under the tap. There’s no one in the bar, every surface looking wiped down and the smell of dish soap heavy in the warm night air.

“You closing up?”

“Mhm,” Nick answers, still not quite looking at him and Louis fights the urge to fidget. “You sticking around?”

“I could.” Louis shrugs, pretending like both of them doesn’t know exactly why he’s there. His heart is pounding in his chest, arousal stirring low in his stomach.

“I need to finish with the chairs, and empty the bins.”

“I’m gonna-” Louis tilts his head in direction of the loos, and walks off without another word.

He spends three minutes staring at his own reflection in the tiny mirror, reminding himself of exactly how stupid he’s being, and then spends another two replying to a text from Harry. He has sent him nothing but emojis, and in the end Louis replies with the one giving the finger.

Nick’s hanging up his apron as he walks back out before reaching to turn off the speakers. The silence that follows is deafening, and for a moment Louis can do nothing but look at Nick, swallowing against the sudden dryness of his throat.

“Let’s go.” Nick suggests, and their arms brush as he walks past Louis and heads for the door. Louis follows, goosebumps spreading up his arm from the light touch and blood thrumming in anticipation. 

Louis hovers on the edge of Nick’s personal space as Nick closes the shutters and locks up the bar. He wants to reach out and touch, but is still caught by surprise when Nick suddenly tugs at his arm and crowds him up against the metal shutters. Louis throws himself into the kiss. Nick knows what he’s doing, tongue hot against Louis’ and making him go weak in the knees. 

They part only when they’re both panting for breath, the shutters hard against Louis’ back. Nick’s still close, so close their chests touch as they breathe in deeply. Louis licks his lips, watching Nick track the movement with a hungry look in his eyes.

“Fuck.” Nick curses, breath hot against Louis’ lips. “I wanna get my hands on you so bad.” 

“Then what are you waiting for?” Louis rises to the challenge, pushing back against Nick. He can’t help but smile when Nick copies him, sparks flying up Louis’ spine as they grind against each other. “Come on, do it. Touch me.”

Nick curses under his breath as Louis attempts to slide a hand down Nick’s shorts. ”Not here,” he says, grabbing Louis’ hand and holding on tightly. “Shit. Come on.” 

With what looks like herculean effort Nick steps back, breaking contact between them, and when he walks around the building Louis follows without a word. Nick crosses the small patio behind the bar, and there’s a shortcut through a hedge that brings them out onto a sidewalk. Louis has to walk quickly to keep up, and they cross the road in a light jog. It’s uphill, and Nick doesn’t turn around to see if Louis is still there as he starts the climb up a couple of steep steps that link the neighbourhood on top of the hill with the road below. 

Nick’s flat is on the ground floor of a tiny, white house squeezed between two bigger ones on a quiet street. Louis follows him inside as he pushes the door open, crowding into Nick’s space and getting on his tiptoes to kiss him. He’s trying to convince himself this isn’t a huge mistake and what better way to do so than kissing Nick. 

Nick pulls back much too soon for Louis’ liking. “My flatmate is home.” Nick mumbles, and Louis shivers as he slides a warm hand down Louis’ arm and takes his hand. “Come here.”

It’s only a few steps from the front door to Nick’s bedroom, and Louis only gets a brief, dark view of a tiny kitchen to his right and a slightly bigger living room before Nick turns left. Nick’s bedroom is facing the street, the only light inside coming from the street lamps out on the road. The bed takes up most of the room, the sheets messily skimming the floor. There’s a dresser in the corner and clothes strewn everywhere. It looks a little barren. There’s no personal stuff anywhere that Louis can see, and nothing on the light-coloured walls. Louis has only been living in his room back at their flat for a few months in total and it’s still littered with his stuff.

“Love what you’ve done with the place.” Louis snorts, toeing out of his Vans and unbuttoning his shorts. When he turns around he’s faced with Nick pulling his striped t-shirt over his head before dropping it to the floor. The sight makes his throat dry up, fingers twitching at his sides. Nick’s so tall, and there’s so much of him that Louis can’t wait to get his hands on.

“You’re such a dick.”

“I’m just saying.”

“Did you come here to comment on the decor or to get off?” Nick scoffs, but he’s back in Louis’ personal space, hands sliding down Louis’ back.

“I can multitask.”

“Yeah?” 

“Mhm.” Louis hums, making a quiet noise when Nick’s hands slip lower, under the waistline of his pants, pushing his shorts down and squeezing his arse. He’s already half hard, dick straining against his underwear and he can’t decide where to put his hands first. Nick’s chest is hairy. He’d known that already, Nick’s inability to keep his shirts buttoned up properly gave that away months ago, but knowing and having it right there are two different things entirely. Louis is itching to reach out and touch. He swallows before leaning in, scraping his bottom teeth over Nick’s nipple, tongue following, pleased when Nick groans and instinctively tightens his hold on Louis’ arse. He pinches it next, hard, laughing when Nick hisses and jerks away. 

“Ow.”

“Don’t be a baby.”

“Maybe I’m not into pain.” 

“What are you into, then?”

“Loud and annoying, apparently. Now shut up and fucking come here, will you?”

Grinning, Louis follows when Nick sits down on the edge of the bed, moving to straddle him. Nick’s mouth finds his throat immediately, licking and sucking, and Louis grinds forwards, mouth dropping open at the first delicious hint of friction. He searches blindly for Nick’s mouth, catching his bottom lip between his teeth. Nick pinches his waist in warning, but still lies back when Louis pushes against his shoulder. 

It’s good. Nick’s hands are all over his back, stroking and digging his fingers into the fleshy part of Louis’ hips. Louis allows Nick to push his t-shirt up, and then sits back to pull it all the way off. Suddenly a little nervous, he leans back down before he can regret it, or before Nick can get more than a glimpse of him. 

Skin on skin is great, a little overwhelming in the best way and even better once they both get completely naked. Louis stays on top, pushing his dick against Nick’s, noticing how Nick’s hard too and it’s still mind blowing. Nick wants to have sex with him.

“Is this okay?” He murmurs against Nick’s lips, grinding his hips and revelling in the push and pull of Nick’s hard-on against his own.

“Yes.” Nick groans, pulling Louis closer with both hands on his arse. “Yeah.”

Louis arches into the touch, almost dizzy with how good it feels. Sweat is trickling down his temple and it’s too hot in the room but somehow it only makes it better. They’re back to kissing, rough and deep, both breathing hard. Louis could come like this, from nothing but the sweat-slick glide of skin against skin. 

“We should get the lube.” Nick pulls back, speaking against Louis’ cheek.

“Hm?” Already missing Nick’s lips on his, Louis moves his attention to the side of Nick’s throat, biting gently just to see what kind of reaction it’ll get him.

“Lube,” Nick gasps, “come on.” He pushes at Louis’ shoulder until Louis moves to let him up. He watches Nick as he gets off the bed and walks over to the dresser, pulling the top drawer open. He’s hot, tall and broad shouldered and his dick’s hard against his abdomen. Louis did that. 

Laying back, he strokes himself slowly as he watches Nick rummage through the drawer, toes curling against the sheets. “Satisfied?” He cocks an eyebrow, reaching out to put a steadying hand on Nick’s waist as Nick climbs on top of him. He looks on as Nick gets the tube open, pouring a generous amount of lube into his hand.

“I will be.” Nick quips, and Louis arches into the touch when Nick reaches out to close a lube slick hand around his dick.

“Fuck,” Louis gasps, straining against the sheets. He’s burning up, every nerve ending of his body feeling as if it has relocated to his dick. Nick’s wanking him with a steady grip and Louis nearly forgets to breathe as Nick takes them both in his hand, the added friction making Louis’ eyes nearly roll back in his head.

It doesn’t take long after that before Louis comes, shuddering through his orgasm. Nick follows, and Louis can feel it, painting his stomach, a few drops ending up on his chest. It’s sticky and a little uncomfortable and really fucking hot. Reeling, Louis feels more than sees Nick climb off him, settling at his side on the mattress. Silence stretches out between them, and with each passing second Louis is growing more and more aware of how they’re no longer touching at all. Opening his eyes, he tilts his head to the side, not seeing much more than the outline of Nick’s profile in the dimly lit room. 

Nick’s staring at the ceiling, and Louis can almost count his eyelashes from where he lays. He kind of wants to reach out and touch him, but he has a feeling it wouldn’t be allowed. It’s a little awkward now, something in the air between them that’s different from the crackling energy five minutes ago. He stays where he is for a little while longer before climbing off the bed, the silence reaching a level of uncomfortable that he’s too confused to deal with. He uses a corner of Nick’s sheet to wipe his stomach, not caring if Nick will be annoyed with him or not. He wishes he could blame this time on alcohol too.

Nick cranes his neck, trying to see what he’s doing before pushing himself up on one elbow. “This isn’t…” He trails off, brushing a hand through his messed up hair. “It’s just sex, yeah? I don’t-”

“Oh my God.” Louis fishes his t-shirt off the floor, turning it right before pulling it over his head. He would throw it in Nick’s face if that wasn’t counterproductive to getting out of there as quickly as possible. “You’re so fucking full of yourself.”

“I’m only asking. It’s a legit concern.”

“It’s really not.”

“Don’t want either of us making this into something it’s not, is all.”

“Don’t worry, I’m not about to give notice or anything.” 

His pants are proving harder to find, and he probably looks ridiculous in nothing but his t-shirt. He finds them tangled with Nick’s t-shirt on the floor, and his shorts next. It’s easier to suppress the tiny sliver of disappointment lodged in his chest if he focuses on getting dressed. It’s okay. Sex doesn’t necessarily change anything. Nick doesn’t like him and Louis is okay with that. He really wants to get out of there and go back to remembering what an annoying twat Nick is.

“Hey.”

Louis looks over his shoulder, right as Nick throws his phone in his direction. It bounces off the mattress and Louis stares at it, confused.

“Leave your number in there.”

“Why?”

“So I can call you to discuss interior design.” Nick deadpans.

“Marble accents are on trend.” Louis quips, but picks the phone up before the screen locks again, typing his number into Nick’s contacts. It’s a stupid decision but they seem to be on trend as well. “There.”

“Ta.”

Louis flips him the bird, walking out of the room without looking back. He can do casual, no problem.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

“Do you actually think you’re being subtle?”

Louis nearly jumps out of his skin when someone speaks up right behind him as he’s walking back inside Helia. Spinning around he glowers at his best friend, finding Zayn leaning against the wall. Zayn has got his arms crossed over his chest, but he doesn’t look mad, not at all. He looks smug and Louis doesn’t like it.

“What are you on about?” 

Zayn rolls his eyes, but reaches for his cigarettes and nods in direction of the back door. The patio out back is not really for guests, occupied mostly by the bar’s big dumpsters and a couple of pallets. Louis follows him back outside, praying there’s no visual evidence of his and Nick’s little tryst anywhere. Zayn sits down on top of the stack of pallets, luckily far away from where Nick made Louis shake apart and come in his mouth only minutes ago. He takes the cigarette Zayn offers him, watching as the lighter flickers to life as Zayn lights his own.

“I bumped into Nick when he was coming back inside,” Zayn says. Louis can hear the smile in his voice and very studiously doesn’t look at him, pretending he needs to focus on the lighter in his hand. “And Gia was looking for him earlier because there was no one covering for him behind the bar.”

Louis shrugs, has another pull from his cigarette. He usually tells Zayn everything, can’t quite put his finger on why he hasn’t told him about Nick yet. It leaves him with a strange mixture of guilt and frazzled embarrassment, makes him unwilling to owe up to it. “I don’t understand what that has to do with me. I was in the loo.”

“Nice bite mark.”

Louis’ hand immediately goes to the sore spot on his neck. Damn Nick and his wonderful, talented mouth. He’d said he hadn’t left a mark, but Louis should have known better. Caught, he looks over at Zayn only to find him struggling not to laugh. He look so pleased with himself Louis immediately realises his mistake. There’s no mark on his neck. “Wanker.”

“Aw, Lou, come on, spill.” Zayn laughs, losing the last of his composure when Louis flips him off. 

“We’re not-” Louis trails off, not sure how to explain it but relieved Zayn’s not upset Louis hasn’t told him. “It’s nothing serious. We’re… having fun.”

Zayn stares at him in disbelief. Louis would appreciate it if he could at least pretend to believe what Louis is also trying to convince himself. It is fun trading orgasms with Nick, it’s become a bit of thing in the last couple of weeks. Louis has Nick’s number saved as three corn emojis in his contacts, and tonight is not the first time the two of them have snuck away to get off only to pretend like nothing’s changed. And nothing has changed, except for the mutual orgasms. Nick still ignores Louis or they throw jibes at one another and Nick still doesn’t _like_ him. He just likes to make Louis come. Maybe.

“Yeah? You sure, mate? Always thought you had a bit of a soft spot for him?”

“Yep.” Louis replies, forcing a lighthearted tone into his voice. “Nick’s a knobhead but he does know how to put that big mouth of his to good use.”

“Too much information.” Zayn sing-songs, dropping his cigarette butt into the water filled, old plastic bottle someone has left for that very purpose. “Well, if you’re sure?”

No. It’s a bad idea, all of it, but Louis rarely remembers that part when Nick looks at him like he wants him. “I am.” Louis stubs his cigarette out, feeling a little sick all of a sudden. “Let’s go back inside.” He doesn’t add ‘please’, but breathes an inward sigh of relief when Zayn drops the subject. He turns to head back, has only gotten a couple of steps away when Zayn catches up to him and wraps his arms around Louis from behind, in an embrace more like a headlock than a hug.

Nick’s behind the bar as they walk back in, busy slicing lemons from what Louis can see and bopping his head along to the track playing on the speakers. He looks a little flushed still, his hair not quite as perfectly styled as earlier and Louis’ skin prickles hotly at the memory of tugging on it not that long ago. 

The others don’t seem to have noticed their absence, busy watching Perrie and Jesy playing pool against Liam and Ed. Louis slips back into his seat just as the girls let out an ecstatic cheer when Perrie sinks a ball into the corner pocket. Louis cheers along with the spectators, watching Zayn out of the corner of his eye. Zayn’s watching Perrie, can’t seem to take his eyes off her. It’s hilarious and Louis would tease him mercilessly right now if it wasn’t so adorable. 

“You gonna ask her out anytime soon?” He leans over to speak close to Zayn’s ear, giving Zayn a look daring him to try and stall the issue again when Zayn jolts and turns his attention to him.

The girls are still celebrating drunkenly, dancing around as they wait for their turn, barely paying attention to their competitor’s next move. 

“I already did.”

“What?” Louis shrieks, loudly, getting to his feet to glare down at his best friend. “Why haven’t you told me?”

“Lou!” Zayn hisses under his breath, tugging furiously on his arm to get him to sit back down. 

They’re drawing attention from a few of the others, and Louis plops back down in his seat before Zayn starts pouting properly.

“Serves you right for not telling me! What the fuck, mate? This is huge.”

“It’s nothing,” Zayn mumbles into his pint, but Louis can tell he’s pleased.

“It’s not ‘nothing’.” He objects, hugging Zayn to his chest dramatically. “Good on you, Zaynie. I thought you were gonna wait so long we’d get a reversed version of the airport scene in Love Actually when we’re going back home.”

“Oh fuck off.” Zayn laughs.

Louis ignores him, only hugs him tighter.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

Louis has the morning off, but he makes a point to show up right on time for when the photographer shows up to take a picture of this week’s group. He really likes the kids they’ve been working with for the past two weeks. The group’s been easy going and excited about the activities Louis and the others have come up with, and he knows from experience that’s not always the case.

“Louis!”

He’s barely made it inside the clubhouse when Sophie comes barrelling into his legs, wrapping her arms around his thighs and squeezing him tightly.

“Hi Soph,” he greets her, reaching down to squeeze her shoulders, and then turns his attention to her mother who’s walking up to them, an easy smile on her face. She’s got a baby on her hip, the end of her braid clutched in his chubby hands.

“Sophie was quite worried you wouldn’t come.”

“I wouldn’t miss taking pictures with you lot,” Louis tells Sophie, smiling down at her. They’ve gotten on splendidly for the last two weeks, and he can honestly say he’s a little sad to know she’s leaving in the morning. “I wanted to come and say goodbye to you lot before you leave.”

“We’re going home tomorrow.” Sophie tells him with a frown, her arm still wrapped around his leg. “I’m gonna sit with Nan on the flight. They have movies.”

“The movies are the best part.” Louis agrees.

“Wanna give Louis his present, darling?” Anna says, offering a reassuring smile when Louis looks at her in confusion. “Sophie picked something out for you yesterday,” she explains. “She was very adamant that you have it.”

A little touched, Louis crouches down so that he’s on Sophie’s level. “Really? I love presents.”

Anna retrieves something from the pocket of her shorts, handing it to her daughter with an encouraging squeeze of her shoulder. Sophie squirms, suddenly shy, but then holds her hand out to show Louis a bracelet dangling from her fingers.

It’s the cheap kind they sell in every souvenir shop. A thin, navy strip of macramé with an ombre row of blue beads, the middle one a deep navy and the colour fading to a cerulean blue at the edges.

Louis smiles. “Is that for me?”

Sophie nods, obviously pleased with his reaction.

“It’s really pretty, Sophie, thank you.” He tells her earnestly, offering his wrist to her. “Will you help me put it on, please?” They struggle a bit with the adjustable straps, but soon the bracelet is around his wrist, the ends dangling against his hand when he moves. “Thank you,” he says again, addressing Anna as well who only smiles and takes her daughter’s hand as Sophie tucks herself against her side.

“We’re the ones who should be thanking you.” She tells him, “the kids have absolutely loved it.”

“It’s been great.” Louis agrees. He catches sight of the photographer walking around the house out of the corner of his eye, Laura inside the Lola costume next to her. “Ready to have your picture taken, Sophie?”

 

 

XOXO

 

 

“Where are you going?”

Harry’s voice cuts through the flat, and Louis freezes mid-move, balancing precariously on one leg, shoe dangling from his fingers. “Uhm...”

“It’s half twelve.” Harry’s leaning back against the doorjamb, phone in hand and toothbrush in his mouth. He’s in nothing but a pair of shorts, hanging low on his hips, probably getting ready for bed. Louis can hear the tap running in the bathroom now that he’s paying attention. 

“I know what time it is, cheers.” 

“Don’t you have work in the morning?”

“Since when do you worry about my bedtime?” Louis slips into his Vans, not looking at Harry. He’s a little embarrassed at getting caught, had definitely been planning on leaving the flat unnoticed. “I’m a big boy, Haz. I can handle it.”

“I’m just saying.” Harry replies, scratching his chest. Louis can see the moment he catches on, a playful smirk tugging at his lips. “Are you going to Nick’s?”

“Fuck off, you nosy bugger.” Louis blusters, reaching for his zip-up hoodie and pulling it on, hood up. It’ll be too hot, but he feels like hiding. 

“It’s that good, huh?”

Louis’ only answer is to give him the finger and Harry’s laugh follows him out the door. He hurries down the stairs and out onto the street, heart still beating a little faster than usual. It’s become a bit of a thing, him and Nick. Louis is not sure what to make of it. Nick will text him, usually once he’s done working for the night, like tonight. Or after he’s had a few drinks. Louis rarely initiates, too hesitant faced with the risk that Nick might not reply, or worse, say no. It’s good, is the thing. Really good.

Nick’s street is quiet. Louis slows down as he reaches the end of it, not entirely sure he has the right house but knocks anyway. To his relief it’s Nick that opens the door, barefoot and still wearing a black t-shirt that says Helia’s in bright blue letters.

“Did you run here?”

“As if.” Louis scoffs, annoyed that Nick has noticed he’s slightly out of breath. “It’s uphill, in case you hadn’t noticed.” Nick only smirks, leaning on one shoulder against the door. “Are you gonna keep me waiting out here all night?”

“Haven’t decided yet,” Nick replies, but he steps aside to let Louis in. The flat is dark and Louis can hear the sound of a television from somewhere.

Louis pauses in the hallway, looking to his right. There’s a bottle of ouzo out on the kitchen counter, next to a dirty plate and a can of diet Coke. Nick’s hand is heavy on his shoulder as Nick pushes past him, ignoring the plate as he opens a cupboard. “Drink?”

“No, thanks.” Louis frowns, “isn’t it a bit late for that?”

“Since when is one o’clock too late for a drink?”.

“It’s not,” Louis shrugs, “A little early to get started, maybe. I have work in the morning.”

“Right.” Nick says, pouring a splash of liquor into a regular drinking glass and throwing it back with a flick of his wrist. “Now, are we gonna do this, or do you have any more opinions you want to share with the class?”

“You’re the one who started it.” Louis bites back, mocking Nick as he continues, “Now, are we gonna do this, or are you gonna keep being a dick?”

Nick only shrugs, but he’s walking up to Louis and grabbing his head with both hands before kissing him.

Nick tastes like ouzo, sharp and a little bitter and it’s fitting. He’s all edges and sharp points tonight, his grip a little too hard and kisses fierce enough for their teeth clack together. Louis contemplates pushing him away. He’s still seething and there’s a cold weight pressing against his ribs because there’s something that feels off about Nick tonight and he’s not sure what it is, or how to fix it. He forgets all about breaking it off when he’s backed into the wall, Nick’s thigh spreading his legs open. Nick’s fingers dig into his back as Louis sucks Nick’s lip into his mouth, biting down on it. When he lets go, breaking the kiss, Nick sucks in a breath, pressing their foreheads together.

There it is, the crackling, golden energy between the two of them that makes kissing Nick, touching him, so fucking good. Eager to level the playfield, he slips a hand underneath Nick’s t-shirt, up his back, digs his fingers into Nick’s shoulder and beckons him closer.

“You better make it worth the trek, Grimshaw.” He taunts, his other hand finding its way into the short hair at the back of Nick’s neck, tugging not so gently. “So far you haven’t impressed me tonight.”

“You know I will. It’s why you keep coming back for more.” Nick argues, and then attaches his lips to Louis’ neck, sucking hard enough that Louis knows it’ll leave a mark. 

“Fucker,” he hisses, head falling back against the wall, his entire body tingling from the rush of arousal as Nick licks over the sore spot. “Fuck.”

“You were saying?” Nick sounds less distant now, a little smug almost. 

Not about to be outdone, Louis reaches down to squeeze Nick through his jeans. It makes Nick’s hands falter as they grip his hips, a groan spilling from his lips.

“Yeah?” Louis chuckles, and does it again, rubbing his palm over the bulge. Nick’s scrambling to get both hands down the back of Louis’ shorts, cursing under his breath. 

Louis is prickling with sweat all over and it’s definitely too hot for a hoodie now. Reluctantly, he pushes Nick back enough to have space to pull the zipper down, letting the hoodie fall to the floor. It has barely hit the tiles before Nick’s moving, catching Louis by the wrist and pulling him in direction of the bedroom. 

They don’t get further than the hallway before they’re back to kissing, Nick’s back hitting the wood of the bathroom door hard enough to make it rattle. Louis hisses sharply into the kiss as Nick scrapes a nail over his nipple, making what little blood was left in Louis’ upper body rush south. “Fuck.” He breathes out, choking on the word when Nick tugs the neckline of his tank down low enough to tease the bud with his mouth this time, his tongue hot and wet against Louis’ skin.

In a last attempt to get them both horizontal, Louis manages to pull back, turning towards the door with a firm grasp on Nick’s hand. He pulls his tank over his head, and is struggling with the button on his shorts when Nick catches both his hands in an iron grip, locking them against his lower stomach, walking so close to Louis he’s almost plastered to his back.

“So eager, aren’t you?” Nick murmurs against his ear, managing to kick the door shut behind them. The room falls dark, and Louis promptly trips over something on the floor, only saved from face planting by Nick’s tight grip around his wrists and his steadying weight against his back.

“I’m not the only one, am I?” Louis manages to reply, but loses his train of thought as Nick begins to grind against him, rubbing his dick against Louis’ arse through the layers of clothing. It’s good, gets even better when Nick lets go of his wrist and slips a hand into his pants, palming his dick. Louis moans, caught somewhere between pushing back against Nick and trying to increase the friction and pressure on his dick. He stumbles, catching himself with a knee against the mattress and ends up climbing onto the bed. It’s unusually high off the ground, and Louis really likes that part, wonders if Nick was the one to lug the old pallets it sits on in here himself. He moves to lie on his back, has barely turned around before Nick is on him, aligning their hips and grinding down.

Nick leans forward, putting his weight on his forearms and attaching his lips to Louis’ neck. It sends tingles down Louis’ spine, leaves him wanting more. He cups Nick’s jaw and pulls him into a kiss. It’s messy and soon they’re not doing much more than panting against each other’s lips. It’s almost too much, the rough drag of denim against denim bordering on painful, but it’s so, so good. Nick’s scrambling for purchase on the bed, one hand buried in Louis’ hair, moaning against Louis’ throat when he finds the angle he’s been searching for. Louis spreads his legs, rubbing himself off against Nick’s thigh. Sparks are dancing up his spine, setting every nerve ending on fire, and Louis realises through the feverish heat that has wrapped around his brain that he’s going to come like this.

“I’m gonna come.” He gasps out, clutching Nick’s t-shirt between his fingers. “Nick.”

“Yeah.” Nick replies, and there’s no teasing note to his voice now. He sounds out of it too, grinding jerkily against Louis, and when he attaches his lips to the mark he left on Louis’ neck earlier, sucking hard, Louis comes, just like that.

He cries out, head thrown back against the mattress, dimly aware of Nick still grinding hard against him before inhaling sharply and following Louis over the edge. Louis is forced to let go of Nick’s t-shirt as Nick moves off him, the mattress jiggling as he collapses next to Louis on the bed.

Buzzing, Louis rubs his fingertips together lazily, not sure they’re still there, still attached to his body. He can feel Nick next to him, their arms brushing together. He’s sweaty and disgusting and he never wants to move. “I can’t believe you made me come in my pants.”

“Yes you can.” Nick mumbles, face half-buried in his pillow. 

Louis shifts into a more comfortable position, grimacing at the sticky situation in his pants. If he didn’t feel so completely boneless he might consider getting off the bed and go in search of a paper towel or something. Carefully, he opens his eyes enough to catch sight of Nick, who’s still got his eyes closed, facing Louis. He’s got a nice face when he’s not scowling. Louis likes the dip of his cupid’s bow, the generous curve of his lower lip begging to be kissed.

His planning is interrupted by Nick pushing himself back to sit on his haunches, blinding Louis when he suddenly flicks the switch on the lamp by the side of the bed.

“Ugh, a little warning, maybe?” Louis complains, covering his eyes with his arm. 

Nick doesn’t reply as he gets off the bed, taking off his shorts and pants, using the latter to wipe his crotch before heading for the dresser in the corner, rummaging through the top drawer for a clean pair. Louis watches him get dressed, feeling his good mood evaporating more with every second that goes by without Nick looking his way. Pulling a t-shirt over his head, Nick heads for the door without as much as a glance in Louis’ direction. He stops by the door to pick up Louis’ discarded tank, throwing it in direction of the bed. 

Louis stomach drops, and he’s left staring at the empty doorway as Nick leaves the room without looking back. He puts the tank back on, trying not to notice how wobbly his legs are as he climbs off the bed. He’s still wearing his shoes. That’s something, at least, makes for a quick getaway. He finds Nick in the kitchen, putting his dirty plate and cutlery in the dishwasher. The casual scene causes the heavy leaden weight in Louis’ stomach to ignite, turn into something louder, angrier. Something itching for confrontation.

“Is this your subtle way of telling me to leave?” Louis asks him, when Nick turns towards the fridge next, only getting one beer out on the counter. Nick shrugs, meets his eyes briefly before looking away. The bottle cap clinks against the countertop and Louis wishes he wasn’t surprised by this turn of events.

Louis bristles. “Is there a timer setting I don’t know about that propels you back into asshole mode every time you get off?”

“You got what you came here for, didn’t you?”

“You texted me first.” Louis points out, icily.

“I wanted to get off, you wanted to get off, and now we have so,” Nick says, taking a long pull of his beer. There’s a mean twist to his mouth now and Louis wants to shake him so hard his teeth rattle, anything to get some life back in his eyes.

“You’re such a prick.” Louis points out, pushing his sweat-damp fringe back. The situation in his pants is becoming more uncomfortable with each passing second.

“Good thing you’re into cock, then, isn’t it, sweetheart?” Nick grins, but there’s nothing happy about it. He pushes past Louis in the doorway, beer in hand.

Louis stares at his back, watching him walk through the living room area and open the patio door. He doesn’t move to leave until Nick has disappeared out of sight, for a moment standing in the dark hallway, caught somewhere between anger and a burning sense of embarrassment. 

He slams the front door shut behind himself, hoping Nick can hear it from where he’s hiding. 

 

 

XOXO

 

 

Louis’ phone rings in the middle of the night on a Wednesday. He fumbles a bit, trying to get a proper grip around it, cursing at the shrill sound. He’s squinting against the harsh light, barely managing to get a look at the screen before he swipes his thumb across to answer. “’lo,” he croaks out, flopping down on his back.

“Hey.” 

The voice at the other end of the line is speaking slowly, and it takes Louis a few seconds to recognise who it is.

“Grimshaw, what, the fuck?” He grinds out, ignoring the spark in his belly, because, no.

“Louis,” Nick drawls. “Wanna kiss you.”

He sounds sincere in a way only drunk people do, and is clearly putting effort into speaking clearly. 

“You’re drunk.”

“Where are you?”

“What?” Resigning himself to the idea of not getting back to sleep anytime soon, Louis sits up in bed, wearily resting his head in his hand. “What are you talking about?”

“Where are you? I don’t know-“

“I’m in bed, you twat. It’s the middle of the fucking night.”

“No, but you’re here, I’m here-“ Nick rambles, and Louis flinches when he suddenly calls out Louis’ name, loudly.

For a second Louis is confused, not sure where the sound is actually coming from. Then it all falls into place and he throws himself out of bed. “Are you here? Nick, are you outside?”

“Too dark here.” Nick mutters, sounding less like he remembers he’s on the phone and more like he’s talking to himself. “Louis!”

“Pipe down.” Louis hisses, moving as quickly as possible across the hall to get their front door open. 

Nick is outside Ed’s and Mike’s door, slumped against the railing. He’s hunched over, nearly swaying where he stands and the sight of him makes something in Louis’ belly swoop uncomfortably.

“You’re not here. I am, but you’re not.” Nick’s still slurring into the phone.

“Oi,” Louis calls out to him, trying to keep his voice down. “Grimshaw.”

Nick looks around as if he’s stuck in slow motion, looking the wrong direction before he spots Louis. The grin that splits his face when he sees Louis is a reminder how bad of a situation this is, because Louis kind of wants to make him look like that always. He pushes the thought away, watching Nick ambling down the balcony, pocketing his phone as he goes.

“Lou.” Nick slurs, careening into Louis and wrapping around him like a vine. 

The force of the embrace has Louis stumbling backwards, crashing into the wall with Nick plastered to his front. He hisses out a curse when his naked back connects painfully with the coarse stone wall, digging his fingers into Nick’s waist to try and steady them both. “Ow.”

“Sorry,” Nick mumbles, his breath hot and damp against Louis’ back. “I’m sorry.”

There’s a sad slant to Nick’s eyes as he pulls back to look at Louis, clumsily reaching out to cup Louis’ cheek, thumb brushing over Louis’ cheekbone.

“What are you doing here?” Louis asks, trying not to notice how Nick reaches for his hand, tangling their fingers together. Nick has really nice hands, big and warm.

“Wanted to kiss you.” Nick mumbles, leaning in for a kiss that Louis ducks to avoid.

“You shouldn’t be here. Go home, get some sleep.”

He doesn’t want Nick to go, is honestly a little nervous at the prospect of letting Nick out of his sight in this state. Nick shakes his head, nose pressed against Louis’ cheek.

“No.” Nick kisses his cheek, his jaw.

Louis opens his mouth to object, but momentarily forgets all about it as Nick leans in to kiss him hungrily. Nick tastes like alcohol and his hands are hot against Louis’ sides, clutching at his waist. Louis allows himself to be kissed, giving back as good as he gets but it’s sloppy at best. Nick’s staggering, a little too uncoordinated and crushing Louis against the wall. It makes him feel bad, like he’s taking advantage even though the initiative is all Nick’s. But Nick has never once told Louis he enjoys kissing him and Louis has a feeling he never would have, if he hadn’t drank what seems like half the island’s supply of ouzo. 

In the end it’s what makes him push Nick away. Gently, he puts both hands on Nick’s shoulders, pushing him back while making sure he doesn’t trip over his own feet. “You should go home, Grimshaw.”

“I don’t wanna go home.” Nick replies, “‘s too quiet.”

He’s swaying a little where he stands, and when he shivers goosebumps appear all over his arms. Against his better judgement, Louis relents.

“Okay, fine.” Louis sighs, pulling Nick in direction of the door. It’s probably an extremely bad idea but he’ll have plenty of time to regret his decision in the morning. “But you better not wake the others.”

He nearly trips when Nick plasters himself to his back, arms wrapped around his stomach and nose buried in the hair at the base of his neck. 

“You smell nice.”

“You smell like a brewery.” Louis quips, and has to smile at Nick’s insulted huff, patting the arm wrapped around his waist in consolation. It’s so much easier pretending the compliment isn’t making something flutter in his chest when Nick’s too drunk to be paying attention. 

It shows to be impossible to walk with an uncoordinated Nick wrapped around him like a vine, so he maneuvers free, slipping a hand around Nick’s waist instead. Louis guides them silently through the hallway. Once they’re in his room, door closed behind them, Louis breathes a sigh of relief. He doesn’t even want to think about Harry or Zayn waking up, finding Nick there and expecting explanations.

Not that he’s embarrassed, but because he’s sure Nick would be. Nick, who doesn’t _like_ Louis but who’s busy trailing kisses up the back of his neck, causing every hair on his arms to stand on end. There’s no stopping the sound he makes as Nick’s hands slip lowers. “Nick,” he groans out, sucking in a breath through his teeth as Nick squeezes his dick.

“Hmm?” Nick mumbles, fumbling with the waistband of Louis’ shorts.

“Let’s go to bed, okay?” Louis suggests, quietly, turning around in Nick’s hold before he can change his mind. “Sit.” He pushes Nick carefully towards the bed, relieved when Nick does as he’s told.

“Come here.” Nick grips Louis’ hip to try and pull him closer.

“Shoes off.” Louis demands, dropping to a crouch in front of Nick and too late realising the position he has put himself in and what it suggests. Looking up he can tell Nick’s thinking the same thing, eyes dark and glued to Louis. Swallowing dryly, Louis flicks on the light before he gets to work unlacing Nick’s beat-up Converse, working alone for a moment before Nick leans down to try to help. He’s a mess, tugging sluggishly at the laces until Louis finally knocks his hands away and finishes the job himself. Socks are next, and then Louis get to his feet, pushing his hair back from his face.

He leaves the shoes by the door, dropping the balled up socks next to them. Nick’s shoes are at least two sizes bigger than his own pair that’s already there. It looks weirdly domestic, their shoes next to each other, and Louis is in too deep. When he looks back over at Nick, Nick has gotten his phone out, is typing something out in great concentration. He’s not sitting straight, careening slightly to the side and Louis really should get some water in him.

He listens carefully when he steps out into the hallway, but there’s no sign of either Zayn or Harry being awake. The clock on the microwave reads 02.24. He fills up two glasses from the big five litre jug they keep in the fridge, putting it back before bringing both glasses with him to his room. Nick has put his phone away and looks half asleep where he sits.

“Hey,” Louis calls his attention, handing him the glass when he looks up and taking extra care to make sure he doesn’t drop it. “Drink this.”

He expects Nick to put up a fuss and surprised when he doesn’t. Nick downs the glass in one, long drink and then promptly burps, loudly. Louis has a mouthful from his own, before leaving it on the bedside table. “Okay, we’re going to bed now. To sleep,” He adds when Nick opens his mouth to speak. “Come on, lie back.”

“I’m not tired.” Nick objects, but he’s crashing hard, moving more sluggishly with each passing second and obediently lies back against Louis’ pillows.

Louis can’t stop the eyeroll, but follows his example without further comment, surprised when Nick wraps an arm around his waist to pull him closer. For a second nothing happens. They’re sharing one of Louis’ pillows, noses almost touching. Louis hasn’t noticed the tiny freckles on the bridge of Nick’s nose before. 

“‘m in bed.” Nick slurs, hand patting Louis’ cheek clumsily. “Like you said.”

“Good boy.” Louis teases. The kiss that follows is softer than it’s ever been between them, less hurried, and Nick’s palm is hot against Louis’ cheek. It’s as if Nick’s had enough to drink to take all edge off the spikes he’s usually covered in, leaving him soft and pliant against Louis. He’s saying something, nearly unintelligible, barely able to speak with his mouth still on Louis’.

“What?” Louis pulls back a little, stays close when Nick’s brow pulls into a frown. “What was that?” 

“I‘m not.”

“You’re not what?” Louis whispers, chest tightening as Nick moves closer, burying his face against Louis’ collarbones. He can feel Nick’s breath against his chest, wraps an arm around his shoulders to keep him close.

“Good.”

Barely breathing, Louis lets the word sink in, suddenly hesitant to speak. It doesn’t sound as if Nick’s joking about being well behaved anymore, but he’s not sure if it’s because of the late hour, or the alcohol, or something else. Perhaps Louis is reading too much into things, but for a second Nick had sounded upset. “What are you then?”

It takes a while, but eventually Nick shakes his head, his hair tickling Louis’ throat and Louis decides to let the subject drop.

Nick’s still in his shorts and t-shirt. It’s too hot, the position they’re in, Louis can feel the sweat beading at the small of his back. It doesn’t matter though, there’s no way he’s moving right now. Instead he inches closer, slowly stroking a hand up and down Nick’s back. He listens to Nick’s breathing going slow and deep, and it takes him a long time before he manages to follow his lead and go back to sleep.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

_Working?_

The text from Nick is there when Louis looks at his phone at lunchtime. He’d woken up alone. For a moment the night’s events had felt like a dream, but the two water glasses on his bedside table let him know it hadn’t been one. Confused, and a little hurt, he’d ignored the little voice at the back of his head telling him he only has himself to blame, but now Nick’s texting him. 

_Not right now_ , he texts back, and Nick’s reply comes back almost immediately.

 _Come over_.

He’s highly unimpressed with himself, but he declines Harry’s offer to head to the staff cafeteria together before heading home, and takes the ten minute walk to Nick’s flat.

The flat smells strongly of garlic when Louis walks through the front door, following Nick’s shouted ‘come in’. He pauses once inside, expecting Nick to come greet him, but when nothing happens he kicks of his shoes and leaves them in the pile by the door. The polished stone floor is cold beneath his feet as he walks into the small kitchenette to his right.

Nick’s by the stove, stirring something around a frying pan with a spatula. He’s moving his hips in sync with the beat of a Drake song playing from a portable speaker on the counter. He doesn’t look up immediately when Louis appears in the doorway, and Louis takes the opportunity to watch him, playing nervously with the hem of his shirt.

When nearly a minute has passed and Nick still hasn’t looked up from what he’s doing, Louis has had enough of waiting. Nick is looking a little too focused on the task at hand and, seriously, what the fuck?

“Hey.”

Another beat passes, and then finally Nick glances in his direction before looking back down at the food. “Hi.”

Still uncomfortable but growing more annoyed by the second, Louis walks up next to him, leaning back against the counter and watching him work. Nick asked him to come over, so he’s going to have to acknowledge him whether he wants to or not. When Nick reaches for the cutting board behind him he stubbornly doesn’t move out of the way to make it easier for him to reach. Nick dumps a heap of bacon into the pan and gives it a stir. There’s tension in his shoulders, making his movements choppy and he’s still not looking at Louis. It’s awkward, and Louis has to fight the urge to fidget. 

“Can I help?” He asks, eventually, the silence between them quickly becoming unbearable.

“Uhm, yeah,” Nick has to clear his throat before he continues. “The water’s ready, there’s pasta in the cupboard over there.”

Louis gets to work, finding the pasta and searching through the kitchen drawers in search of a pair of scissors instead of asking. He might slam the drawer shut with a little more force than necessary, trying to send a message to Nick’s who is still not quite looking him in the eye. Louis doesn’t get him. It’s not as if he did anything truly embarrassing last night. Sure, he got shitfaced and was a bit of a mess, but that’s not the first time Louis has seen him like that. At least he didn’t have his tongue down some Geordie Shore wannabe’s throat this time.

Once he has finished his task and poured the pasta into the boiling water, giving it a stir, he goes back to watching Nick who’s pulling the pan off the hob, apparently done with the sauce. Nick has to pass him when he moves to wash his hands, and he leaves a good two feet of space between them as he does. Finished, he leans back against the bar separating the kitchenette and the living room, leaving them opposite each other.

The kitchenette is so small their feet are almost touching. Nick is fiddling with the silver chain he wears, tugging the charms back and forth and that’s it, Louis has had more than enough. “Well, as riveting as this has been, I’m gonna go.” He can barely keep himself from stomping his foot in frustration. He turns to leave but is stopped by a hand wrapping around his elbow, stopping him in his tracks. Whirling around, yanking his arm free as he does, he’s ready to launch into a tirade about asking people over only to ignore them, but something about the look on Nick’s face stops him.

Nick pulls a hand through his hair, exhaling noisily before looking back at Louis. “Do you want a beer or something?”

Louis hesitates, frustration still sizzling in his veins, but he nods. He should leave, he knows, and yet he finds himself reaching for the bottle Nick hands him with a quiet ‘thanks’. Nick doesn’t let go of the bottle, and when Louis refuses to relinquish his hold Nick tugs, leaving him with the choice to let go or move closer.

Louis lets Nick pull him into his personal space, allows himself to be positioned between the counter and Nick’s body when Nick turns around. He’s frowning down at Louis, looking at him as if Louis is a puzzle he’s trying to solve, and he breathes out a heavy sigh as Louis turns to put his bottle down and then moves his hand to Nick’s waist. 

“You’re an idiot.” Louis points out, calmly, much calmer than he feels because he might be considering stabbing Nick in the arm with a fork for being so confusing. Instead he digs his fingers into Nick’s waist, delighted when he startles. Does it again, harder, pleased when Nick tries to bat his hand away.

“Bloody hell, you’re such a pest. Stop that.”

“No.” Louis argues, heart picking up speed as Nick wraps his hands around Louis’ wrist, pulling until their hands are crushed between their chests and Louis has to tilt his head up to look Nick in the eyes.

“Could put your hands to better use.” Nick murmurs against his lips, humming into the kiss when Louis leans in to cover his lips with his own.

The kiss turns filthy in a second, deep and frenzied, and soon they’re both breathing quickly, Nick’s hand twisted in the back of Louis’ t-shirt.

The pasta is more than a little over-cooked once they actually remember it. Louis watches Nick prepare two plates, not showing his surprise. He follows Nick’s lead as they bring their plates out onto the patio. It’s a tiny space consisting of a stretch of sunbleached tiles, a rickety plastic table and two chairs. It’s hot out, and the little arrangement is only just sheltered from the sun. There’s a stone wall and some dried up shrubbery separating the patio from the road, birds singing from somewhere hidden in the greenery.

They eat in silence but it’s not as awkward this time. It’s a good meal and the beer is cold and Louis has to fight a smile when Nick hooks a foot around his ankle. He’s scraping the last of the sauce from his plate when something catches his attention from the corner of his eye. It’s a cat, black and white, sneaking out from underneath the bushes to perch on top of the wall.

Nick has noticed it too. The cat’s looking at them expectantly, and it all makes sense when Nick gets up from his seat and disappears indoors.

He returns a minute later with a dish in hand, speaking lowly as he approaches the cat. Louis expects it to run away, and is surprised when it doesn’t. Sitting primly, it watches Nick approach and, once he has put the dish down on top of the wall, carefully edges closer. Nick watches it eat for a moment before he turns back around. 

Louis can’t help himself. “Aw.”

“Shut up, she looked hungry.” Nick grumbles, scratching at the back of his neck. He looks so caught Louis has to laugh.

 _“She_ looked used to it.” Louis corrects him, grinning. Leaning back he takes another sip of beer. “Did you just happen to have cat food in the house, is that it?”

“I think she’s pregnant.” Nick’s decidedly not looking his way, reaching for his bottle and picking at the label. “Certainly looks fat enough, I don’t want her starving.”

“White knight Grimshaw to the rescue.” Louis chuckles, “Who would’ve thought.”

“Oh, fuck off.”

“If it looks like a duck.” Louis sing-songs, deftly avoiding Nick’s attempt to kick him in the shin. He has a feeling he needs to get going soon and it bothers him. With the awkward start they got off to he feels like he only just got here. A glance at his phone informs him that he should have left already. “Shit, I have to get back to work.” Getting to his feet Louis picks up his empty plate. “Thanks for lunch.”

“Sure.” Nick shrugs as he too gets to his feet and picks up his plate. 

Louis heads back inside, aware of Nick trailing after him. He dumps his plate in the sink, and leaves his bottle on the counter following Nick’s instruction. His shoes are right where he left them, just inside the door. “So.” He doesn’t know how this thing ends. They’ve never hung out without getting off and he’s not sure what’s okay and what’s not. “What-”

Nick cuts him off with a kiss, hand wrapped around the back of Louis’ neck. Louis ends up holding on to Nick’s wrist, clinging to him as they snog. It’s too easy, getting a little lost in kissing Nick, and Louis is most definitely going to have to run back once he finally pulls away.

“See you around?” He asks, watching Nick wipe the corner of his mouth with the pad of his thumb.

“You know where to find me.” 

 

 

XOXO

 

 

Louis is so hot. So very, very hot. And not in the sexy, fill-my-cup-with-liquor-kind of way, but in the drenched-in-sweat-and-pounding-headache-kind of way. He’s slowly making his way up the road towards the house, nearly dragging the black bin bag he’s carrying after him on the ground. He needs to get the Lola costume in the wash, and even though he left the head behind at the hotel it’s _heavy_. And he’s so hot. Being trapped inside a costume for forty-five minutes in nearly 40 degree weather should be illegal.

He swallows, his tongue sticking uncomfortably to the roof of his mouth. He should have had a drink of water before he left the hotel, but he’d been so focused on getting out of the costume and home to his shower and an afternoon off that he forgot. It’s almost one o’clock and the sun is beating down, the heat rolling off the asphalt in waves. His head really hurts, a spiky kind of ache that only adds to his misery. He’s waiting to cross the street when a familiar figure idles up beside him, and Louis nearly groans out loud at the sight of Nick. “Ugh, just what I needed.”

Perhaps his current condition isn’t doing wonders for his impulse control.

“You look like shit.”

Nick doesn’t, Louis can’t help but notice. He looks rather good actually, dressed in light washed denim shorts and a black t-shirt with the bar’s logo on it, Ray-Bans protecting his eyes. “Well, you try to spend forty five minutes stuck inside a fucking cow costume and we’ll see how you look afterwards.”

Nick stares blankly at him for a few seconds, eyes travelling from Louis’ no doubt incredibly dishevelled hair all the way down to the overstuffed bin bag where Lola’s fur is peaking out. Then he starts laughing and if Louis wasn’t dying the death of a thousand fiery suns he might be secretly proud at the uncharacteristically loud laugh his comment has earned him. 

“I would pay real money to watch you get into that costume.” Nick says once he’s pulled himself together some, and Louis would come up with a witty comeback but he’s so hot and so tired. Nick falls quiet; perhaps it’s the lack of banter that’s throwing him off. When he speaks up again the laughter is gone from his voice. “You really don’t look that well.”

It’s uncanny; the look on Nick’s face is almost concerned and Louis is dizzy enough without having to try and decipher what it all means. He hefts the bag up on one shoulder, throwing a cursory glance over his shoulder to make sure there’s no more cars approaching, “I’m okay, just need to-” He trails off as the road swims before his eyes, the whole world tilting to one side for one horribly lurching second.

“Whoa.” Nick’s hand wraps around his lower arm, his grip nearly tight enough to hurt. “Shit, okay, hand that over,” he demands, reaching for the bin bag and throwing it over one shoulder after a brief tug of war. It’s a testament to how shitty Louis is feeling that he barely has enough energy to pull off even the smallest of fights. “Fuck, this thing is heavy. Okay, let’s go.”

“I’m fine,” Louis grumbles, and if he wasn’t already so flushed he’s pretty sure he’d be blushing. “You don’t have to bring out the white steed, Grimshaw, I’m sure you have places to be, cats to feed.”

“Oh my God, shut up, you absolute child. You look three seconds away from ending up unconscious in the street, now move.”

Louis shrugs, too tired to come up with another clever retort, and it’s not until he starts walking that he notices that Nick still has a hand on his arm. They slowly make their way up the hill and Louis won’t admit it, but he’s really glad he’s not dragging the stupid costume along anymore. Getting up the stairs to his flat is challenging enough without it, and he’s trying to unlock the door with shaking hands when Nick resolutely takes the keys from him and gets the door open. Stepping inside he stumbles over the shoes scattered all over the floor and slumps down on one of the kitchen chairs. He’s going to get up and get himself a bottle of water. Soon.

“Lou, is that you?” Zayn walks out of his room, phone in hand, “I’ve got a-” he trails off at the sight of Louis. “Shit, you look rough mate, what’s wrong? Uhm, hey, Nick.”

“Thanks,” Louis doesn’t bother raising his head; keeping his face buried in the crook of his elbow. He’s dimly aware that he should be embarrassed about this. Not drinking enough water is a rookie mistake, and to make it worse Nick Grimshaw knobhead extraordinaire is around to see it, but he doesn’t have the energy right now. His head really hurts.

“He’s bordering on fucking heat stroke.”

“I’m right here,” Louis complains, and okay, maybe the words come out slightly garbled and he still needs to get back downstairs to the laundry room and shove that stupid costume in the washing machine. It takes forever to dry and they’re using it again in just a couple of days. In a minute though, the table is pleasantly cool against his cheek. Fuck, his head is killing him. Grimacing, he makes a solid attempt at getting back on his feet. “I’m fine, just have to get Lola in the wash-“

“You’re not going anywhere.” Zayn puts a firm hand on his shoulder, keeping him in place. “Could you keep an eye on him, please? I’ll be right back.” Zayn continues, and it takes a second for Louis to realise Zayn is talking to Nick. He hears the sound of the fridge opening and something being placed on the table next to his head. He’ll check what it is in a second, liking the way his headache simmers to a slow pulsating kind of pain if he doesn’t move his head too much.

Too bad it does little to ease the nausea growing in stomach and threatening to crawl up his throat. It’s not until something cold is nudged against his arm that he looks back up, blinking groggily at one of their emergency bottles of Gatorade.

“Drink,” Nick instructs him as he uncaps the bottle and nudges Louis with it again.

“Bossy,” Louis grumbles, but reaches for the bottle anyway, nearly groaning out loud in relief at the first mouthful, even though he really doesn’t enjoy the taste. “Stop staring at me.”

Nick huffs, arms crossed over his chest as he leans back against the kitchen counter. “I’m not staring. Just not too keen on you fainting on my watch, Zayn would have my hide. Now, shut up. Finish your drink.”

When Zayn comes back a few minutes later, he’s managed to down a third of the bottle and feels a little better already. It’s a relief. A trip to the emergency room was not how he envisioned his afternoon off.

Zayn nods at the sight of him, clapping Nick on the shoulder. “Thanks, I can take it from here.”

“I’m still right here, you know.” Louis points out, having another mouthful to try to make quick work of emptying the bottle. If there’s one thing worse than orange Gatorade, it’s lukewarm, orange Gatorade. Now that he doesn’t feel quite as close to collapsing, the taste is really starting to bother him. “But, yeah, thanks.”

“No bother.” Nick shrugs, looking a little unsure and it’s weird. Louis has never seen him look like that. “Feel better, yeah?”

Louis manages a thumbs up, decidedly not watching Nick leave.

“So,” Zayn says the second the door shuts behind Nick, and fuck no. Louis knows that tone of voice too well and it’s not fair of Zayn to take advantage of his weakened state. “Nick’s a pretty decent guy.”

“We’re not having this conversation right now, or ever.”

“You’re not saying no.” Zayn is grinning, hovering close as Louis slowly pushes to his feet.

“I’m going to have a shower and a nap.” Louis ignores him, but allows Zayn to hover by his side without complaint as he shuffles towards his room. He knows Zayn’s not oblivious to his tiny, barely there crush on Nick, but there is no way Louis is going to talk about it when he’s not at full wit.

“Get some rest, Lou.” Zayn chuckles, pressing a kiss to his temple and laughing harder when Louis swats his shoulder.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

He pretends like he doesn’t know where he’s going, like the fact that he spent an extra five minutes in front of the too small mirror in his room isn’t a dead giveaway. 

Most of the others are working and Louis walks down the main street by himself, with a stomach filled with butterflies. He steps into the air-conditioned, brightly lit shop where Perrie and Jesy works, stalling for the sake of it, because he feels too eager and it’s stupid. He spends a good ten minutes poking at the colourful, touristy bits and bobs as he makes small talk with Jesy. Eventually she seems to be growing more than a little confused by his lingering presence so he leaves before she can ask any questions, stepping back out onto the street. The night is warm; it’s been weeks since the temperature dropped below thirty degrees and Louis barely remembers what wearing actual full length trousers feels like. He misses his skinny jeans.

It’s a Tuesday, the town a little calmer than it’s been lately and when he stops outside Helia, Nick’s easy to spot behind the bar. Louis watches him work for a little while, the cut of his profile and the way he smiles at Gia. She calls something over her shoulder as she walks away, balancing a tray of pints with practiced ease and Louis can feel his mouth tug into a smile as Nick throws his head back and laughs. This is where Louis should turn around and go back home, maybe stop by Liam downstairs and see if he wants to play some FIFA. He already knows he won’t.

Fuck it. He jogs up the steps to the pub, waving to Andreas who’s entertaining a few of his friends in one corner. Nick has got his back turned to him when he walks up to the bar, busy working the register, and Louis sits down on one of the barstools. When Nick turns back around he jumps slightly, and it’s obvious he hadn’t seen Louis walk in. 

“Louis, hi.”

“Hey. Slow night.”

“Yeah. Tuesdays usually are.”

“Right.” Louis nods, playing with the corner of the rubber bar mat. 

Gia comes back, repeating an order to Nick before slipping through the door to the kitchen. Nick starts pulling pints, turning to Louis as he puts the last two down on the tray. “Beer?”

“Sure, yeah.”

Nick ducks down to get two bottles of Carlsberg from the fridge, and it makes Louis pause. He prefers them to the local Keo and is oddly touched to realise that perhaps Nick has been paying attention. Nick uncaps the two bottles with practiced ease, holding one out to Louis. Gia comes back out, placing a basket of nachos next to the beers on the tray before picking it up. Nick watches her go, and Louis watches him in turn.

“So.” Nick turns back towards him, putting his weight on both arms against the bar top. He’s suddenly so much closer, eyes dark as they land on Louis and framed by those ridiculous lashes. 

“To slow shifts at work.” Louis replies, ridiculously pleased when Nick laughs.

“I’ll drink to that,” Nick grins, angling the neck of his bottle towards Louis.

Louis smiles back, clinking the bottles together. Pulling in a deep breath he decides to just go for it. “So, uhm, thanks for your help, last time. For walking me home and stuff.”

Nick has another mouthful of beer before he replies. “No problem.”

A group of girls walk in, aiming for one of the bigger tables, and soon a couple show up too. Nick gets busy making mojitos, and Louis alternates between watching Nick work and the old football match being shown on the telly above the bar. A new beer is placed next to his elbow when he’s done with his first, and eventually he manages to sweet talk Gia into making him nachos. 

Eventually things quiet down again and Nick can spend more time talking to Louis than actually working. Halfway through his third beer, Louis is mellow enough not to think too much about the fact that they’re actually keeping up a conversation. It’s easy, is the thing, talking to Nick when he’s not being an asshole. 

It’s almost one o’clock when Louis looks up from where they’re drawing dicks and mustaches on the faces covering a magazine Nick found behind the bar to realise the place is almost empty. The last patrons are walking up to the bar to pay, and Louis scribbles nonsense on the magazine while Nick helps them. Once they’ve gone Nick gets busy wiping down the tables and Louis finds himself trailing after him, stacking chairs on top of tables.

“I can’t believe you’ve tricked me into doing the heavy lifting.” Louis grumbles, struggling to pile the cushions for the patio furniture according to Nick’s instructions.

“Consider it payment for your beers.”

Everything finally in a decently organised pile, Louis straightens where he stands, stretching his arms behind his back. “I can pay for those.”

“That’s not what I said.” Nick points out calmly, turning his back to Louis as he begins emptying the register. “Speaking of, do you want another one?”

Louis stops to consider his options. He’s a little buzzed, feeling loose around the edges and he’s pretty sure Nick’s been matching him beer for beer. Another beer could possibly tip the scale over to inebriated territory and it sounds like an excellent idea right now, but he’s not so sure he’ll agree with himself tomorrow morning. “Aren’t you locking up?”

“We could take them to go.” Nick replies, flicking off the lights behind the shelf filled with liquor bottles. “Go down to the beach, maybe?”

“Sure.” Louis agrees, hoping it doesn’t come out sounding as eager as he feels. He’s supposed to be at the office to help James with something bright and early tomorrow, but it won’t be the first time he goes to work hungover and on too little sleep, and it won’t be the last. “Yeah, let’s do that.”

They lock up the bar once they’re done, Louis holding on to both bottles as Nick pulls down the shutters, and then they take a shortcut between two hotels to reach the beach.

 

There is a full moon out and the beach is bathed in silver light when they walk out onto the sand. Waves are rolling in gently, the sound of the water blending with the distant noise of the still-open bars, creating a familiar background track as they walk towards the shoreline. The sunbeds are all stacked up in neat piles, tied together with sturdy chains. They sit down, using a stack of sunbeds somewhere in the middle of the beach as a backrest. A group of people are having a party further down the beach, a bonfire flickering against the dark night sky.

Louis leans back against the sunbeds, kicking off his shoes and digging his toes into the sand. He loves the beach at night, the slightly illicit feeling of being somewhere after hours, and the eerie darkness of the sea. He’s watching the moon as Nick sits down next to him, stretching his legs out with a tired groan. “That’s what you get for working in crap shoes,” Louis nods to Nick’s Converse, smiling at the affronted sound Nick makes.

“Says he who wears hooves for work.”

“Oi,” Louis splutters, shoving Nick in the shoulder hard enough for him to sway sideways, catching himself on his elbow in the sand.

Nick laughs, has a sip of his beer while looking at the ocean. Louis can barely make out his features in the dim light, the spotlights surrounding the nearby hotels and the moon their only source of light. It’s enough for him to see the way Nick smiles around his bottle and Louis wants to kiss him. He kicks sand at him instead, most of it ending up on his aforementioned shoes.

“Such a child.” Nick chides, but it’s lighthearted and his eyes sparkle when he looks over at Louis. He reaches down to untie his shoes, taking them off and then his socks, shoving them into the shoes. He looks pleased when he sits back up, stretching his legs out in front of him.

Tongue-tied, Louis ends up drawing lines in the sand with his fingertips to keep from touching. A plan forms, and he moves quickly as Nick turns his head away, the party goers further down the beach having caught his attention. He carefully pushes his bottle into the sand, behind the legs of the sunbeds, in preparation for the attack. Quick, he picks up a handful of sand and, using his free hand, dumps it down the neckline of Nick’s t-shirt.

The reaction is immediate. Nick yelps, arching forward. A bad move that probably only allows the sand to travel further down his back.

Louis explodes with laughter, scrambling on all fours as he tries to move out of the way when Nick lunges for him. He doesn’t get very far before two strong arms wrap around his waist, pulling him backwards as he laughs helplessly.

“You little shit.” Nick growls, practically shovelling sand down the back of Louis’ tank, dumping a handful on top of Louis’ head and beginning to laugh too when Louis cries out in protest in-between bursts of laughter. Louis might be smaller, but he knows how to use his size to his advantage, wriggling free and soon they’re practically wrestling on the sand. Louis gets another handful of sand down Nick’s t-shirt before Nick manages to pin him down, straddling him and trapping both of Louis’ arms down by his sides.

“Do you yield?”

Louis shakes his head, trying to keep a serious face. He’s going to be washing sand out of his hair for days and he couldn’t care less. “Never.” He quips, face splitting into a grin, struggling in Nick’s hold.

Nick hums, pretending to contemplate his next move. He leans down to speak close to Louis’ ear, his breath hot against Louis’ skin. “What am I gonna do with you, then?”

Louis attempts a shrug, hoping Nick can’t tell how his breathing has gone all shallow. He shivers as Nick brushes his lips across the sensitive skin beneath his ear, a hint of tongue as he bites down gently on the tendon.

“You could do more of that.” He suggests, heat simmering in the pit of his stomach. It’s almost as if he’s looking at himself from the outside, extremely aware of where they are and how easily someone could spot them if they were to walk by. Nick’s covering him almost completely, even more so when he moves in closer, half on top of Louis and pushing him into the sand.

Louis is getting hard, groans as Nick gets a hand between them and rubs the palm of his hand over his growing bulge. He pulls Nick closer and covers his lips with his own, lifts his hips to make it easier for Nick to push his shorts down. 

Louis could kiss him for days. It’s a little rough, the scrape of Nick’s stubble sharp against his chin. Nick’s wanking him with steady strokes and it’s good. Really good. It doesn’t take long before Louis comes with a sharp inhale, arching into Nick’s touch and tampering down on his moan just in time. Nick pulls away right before it gets too much, breathing harshly against Louis’ cheek, holding himself up on his elbows. It’s almost dark now that they’re horizontal, barely any of the light coming from the hotel garden reaching them, but Louis can still make out the the focused look on Nick’s face, the little crease between his brows. He’s still hard, Louis can feel him against his hip.

“That was brilliant.” He admits, quietly, their position allowing him to speak almost directly into Nick’s ear. He’s got one hand underneath Nick’s t-shirt, stroking slowly down his back, then over his arse. “Made me feel really good.”

“Fuck.” Nick groans, letting Louis push him over onto his back, moving a hand to Louis hip when Louis moves to sit astride his thighs. 

“Yeah,” Louis whispers, encouragingly, working quickly to get Nick’s shorts open and get his hands on him. He likes the feeling of Nick’s dick in his hand, likes it even more when he can make Nick come. He works him over fast, thumb rubbing over the head. ”Come on, then.”

Nick comes with a low cry, fingers digging into Louis’ thigh, just above his knee. It’s a good look on him, coming, head thrown back and eyes squeezed shut. Louis doesn’t stop until Nick wraps a hand around his wrist to halt his movement. Louis climbs off him, sitting down in the sand. He reaches for his beer and has a mouthful. It’s too warm by now, but wets his parched throat. Nick still has his eyes closed when Louis looks back over to him, one arm thrown over his head, chest falling and rising rapidly as he regains his breath. His t-shirt is a mess, mottled with come, and it’s probably a good thing Nick’s not likely to run into anyone he knows on the way home. There’s no mistaking those stains for anything but what they are. His gaze travels higher, and he nearly jumps when he finds Nick looking at him. Feeling caught, Louis looks away, has another mouthful of beer, before pushing the bottle into the sand. Nick tucks himself back in his shorts, still lying down, and it prompts Louis to do the same.

Louis stifles a yawn. Nick looks comfortable where he is, but no matter how tempting it looks joining him would be a bad idea. Louis is not sure he could get back up if he were to lie down right now, feeling tired and loose-limbed. He watches the waves instead, arms folded on top of his knees, and jolts lightly when Nick touches his arm.

“What’s this?” Nick tugs lightly at the bracelet around Louis’ wrist, thumb brushing over the row of beads.

“Got it from one of the kids.” Louis explains, quietly. “I like it.”

“It’s nice.” Nick agrees. When Louis reaches for his wrist in turn, Nick lets him pull it into his lap. There’s a tangle of bracelets around Nick’s wrist, a mix of silver ones and cheaper makramé ones.

“Looks like you’re the expert.” Louis points out, carefully sorting through the tangled mess. “I trust your judgement.”

“You should.” Nick drawls, stretching languidly. “You and Harry work together during the days, right?”

“We do”

“Zayn too?”

There’s no stopping the laughter from spilling out. “No.” Louis snickers. “Zayn wouldn’t last five minutes with the four year-olds. He’s a guide.”

“But you and him came here at the same time, yeah?”

Apparently Nick had been paying more attention back then than Louis knew. Louis hums in agreement, filing that piece of information away for later. “We got to know each other in Thailand, worked together at the same hotel in Phuket before coming here.”

“You didn’t know each other before then?” 

“We didn’t.” Louis says, knowing how strange it sounds to have become so close, so fast. There’s a special bond between all of them, guides and kids’ reps and entertainers, the kind that grows from everyone being on their own, far away from home.

“Did you like, request to come here together? Can you do that?”

“Nope,” Louis smiles, remembering the whole ordeal of applying for a new placement with fondness now that the panic they all felt then has faded. “We didn’t even tell one another where we had applied when rotations came up, too upset about the thought of ending up on opposite sides of the world, and then both of us ended up being placed here anyway“

“When was this?”

“It was, uhm, four months ago that we came here. And we were in Phuket for five months before that.”

“Have you been back home during that time?”

The question prompts the all too familiar pang of homesickness, sparking up and fading again before Louis can really process it. “Once. My family came for Christmas in Thailand, and then I was home for a week before coming here but I miss them a lot. Kind of can’t wait to see them in September.”

Nick’s silent for a beat. “You’re leaving?” 

“I’m going back to uni.” Louis explains, twirling his bracelet around his wrist. “Five more weeks here and then I’m done.”

Nick reaches out to stop his fiddling, fingers strong as they wrap around Louis’ wrist, tugging. 

“What?” Louis laughs, raising an eyebrow at Nick’.

“Come here.”

“Why?” Louis asks, but allows himself to be pulled down next to Nick in the sand.

“You ask too many bloody questions.” Nick tells him, leaning over to cover Louis’ lips with his own. The kiss is as soft as it is unexpected.

Pulling back, Louis makes himself as comfortable as he can in the sand, on his side, propping his head up on one arm. They’re not cuddling, there’s still a good inch of sand between them, but it’s still new, feels a lot more intimate than any position they’ve ever been in before.

“What do you study, back home?”

“And you say I ask too many questions.” Louis replies, but quickly continues. He doesn’t really want Nick to stop asking questions. “I’m doing English and education at Leeds.”

“Teaching? I don’t think I could ever do a job like that.”

“You work in a bar.” Louis points out, poking Nick in the ribs with his index finger. “Kids are way better than drunk idiots.”

“You might have a point.” Nick grins, struggling to get comfortable in the sand. He somehow manages to position his shoes to act as a pillow, one hand behind his head for additional support.

“What about you?”

“What about me?” Nick replies. Louis can tell he’s understood the question perfectly, doesn’t know why he’s stalling. 

“Are you staying here? Working for Andreas for the rest of your life?”

Nick shrugs, and Louis can practically feel Nick closing back up next to him, already regretting the question but it’s too late now. He’s not sure if he’s being brave or stupid for asking but he’s curious, desperate to know more. He can’t figure Nick out, struggles to reconcile the prickly arsehole who has barely spared Louis a look the last couple of months with the Nick who feeds stray cats and knows what kind of beer Louis prefers.

“So what if I am?”

“That’s not...” Louis frowns, struggling to find the right words. He doesn’t like the way Nick’s no longer looking at him, staring up at the sky instead. “I’m just asking. If bartending is your true calling then good for you. I’m not judging.”

“Why does everything have to fucking mean something?” Nick asks, and there’s a harsh note creeping into his voice that makes Louis want to rewind the last couple of minutes. “I like it here, I’m having a good time. I don’t want to be tied down.”

“Did you ever consider going to uni?” Louis hurdles on. 

“Why do you wanna know?”

“Just wondering, is all. It’s common, you know, uni.”

Nick’s quiet for a while, Louis counts to three waves rolling in towards the beach before Nick speaks up again. “Tried it, wasn’t for me. Was at Leeds too, actually.”

“What did you study?”

“Communication and media studies. Had this grand plan on being on the radio.” Nick explains, laughing dully, and their eyes meet briefly as Nick turns his head towards Louis. “Let’s just say that didn’t happen.” 

“You didn’t like it? I can picture you on the radio.”

“I wanted to do the radio, not read a bunch of books and sit through lectures. So I spent a lot of time partying instead. Got myself a boyfriend.”

“Yeah the reading isn’t my favourite part either,” Louis agrees, “but wouldn’t it have been worth it eventually?”

“I wouldn’t know.” 

Louis doesn’t know what to say to that. When he looks right he spots his beer, still standing securely in the sand. He reaches over Nick’s chest for it, having a sip. Nick makes a grabby gesture for it, and he hands the bottle over without comment. 

Nick downs the last of it in one long pull, neck bent awkwardly to avoid having to sit back up, and drops the bottle into the sand when he’s done. “I’m not good with a challenge.” He says, and Louis is surprised he’s not letting the subject drop the way Louis thought he would. “Couldn’t fucking pass my business module and everyone else seemed to get it. So I kinda stopped going and, yeah, eventually I wasn’t allowed back. Broke up with the boyfriend…” Nick trails off, voice hoarse when he continues. “If it counts as a breakup when one of you couldn’t care less and was fucking half the student union on the side.”

“That’s shit.” Louis tells him, unsure of what else to say. It feels like he’s being shown a side to Nick he hadn’t expected and he’s not sure what to do with it. All he knows is he wants to know more, and is a little overwhelmed by the urge to fight whoever made Nick feel like he wasn’t good enough. Without thinking, he reaches for Nick’s hand, resting on his stomach, giving it a brief squeeze and then keeps his hand on top of Nick’s, resting.

Nick laughs but there’s no humor to it. “Yeah,” He stops to clear his voice. “That’s it, I guess. I left, faffed around a bit at my mum and dad’s and then I came here. We’d planned this holiday, Adam and I, or I did, really. He wasn’t too keen but I guess I was too desperate to really notice. We couldn’t get a refund so in the end I went on my own and, well, stayed.”

“And now you’re here.” Louis prompts, carefully. There’s a sad tilt to Nick’s mouth that he hasn’t seen before and he doesn’t like it one bit. Nick has a nice smile, one that makes his eyes go all crinkly at the edges and he should look like that always.

“Here I am.” Nick agrees, dislodging Louis’ hand when he reaches up to play with the chain around his neck. Louis keeps his hand on Nick’s chest, feeling it rise and fall against his palm. He doesn’t want to stop touching Nick, not when he looks like he does right now. As if the lightest breeze could knock him off his feet or send him sailing through the air.

“Stayed in Ayia Napa for a bit at first, worked some truly shit jobs and got drunk a lot. Woke up on this beach one morning, with no clue how I got here.”

Louis can’t hide his shock and Nick grimaces, pulls a hand through his quiff, bracelets glinting in the dim lighting. It’s a bit of a surprise when he puts a hand on Louis’ arm, drawing patterns with careful fingertips as he continues. “Yeah, I know, not my finest moment. Andreas was working early at the bar when I walked by, getting deliveries or whatnot. I asked to use his phone and I suppose he took pity on me. I must have looked a right mess. He cooked me breakfast and offered me a job before I finished my eggs.”

“He’s a good one.” Louis says, after a beat, watching Nick’s Adam’s apple move as he swallows. Louis might have to give Andreas a hug the next time he sees him.

“He is.” Nick agrees, after a moment, then adds, “I haven’t told anyone that story before.”

Louis had guessed as much. It feels as if he’s been entrusted with a secret that he’s not sure how he came to be worthy of. “Thank you, for telling me.” he says, offering Nick a small smile when he looks over, obviously surprised.

They lapse into silence, Nick’s still drawing shapes and swirls on Louis’ lower arm, and Louis finds himself dozing, head pillowed on his arm. The waves rolling in are creating a lulling backdrop. He’s nearly asleep, Nick’s chest rising and falling steadily against his palm, when a roar of laughter coming from further down the beach makes both of them jump.

“Shit.” Louis croaks out, rubbing a hand over his face. “I nearly fell asleep.”

“Arseholes.” Nick grumbles, and Louis likes the way he sounds, a little grumpy from having been woken up.

They untangle themselves unhurriedly, both ending up sat on the sand for a moment before getting to their feet. Louis pats his pockets, making sure he has all of his belongings. It would be a nightmare trying to find his keys in the darkness.

“Ready?” Nick asks, stretching lazily. 

Louis nods, and they walk side by side towards the street. They pause once they reach the boardwalk, brushing the sand off their feet before putting their shoes back on. They come to a stop outside Helia’s, and before Louis can begin to wonder how to say goodbye, Nick has pulled him into a sideways hug, pressing a quick kiss to Louis’ temple.

“Don’t get abducted by aliens on your way home.” Nick says, and is halfway up the stairs before Louis has even caught on to what’s happening.

“I’ll try my best.” He calls out, watching Nick disappear around the corner, no doubt heading for the shortcut back to his flat.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

Niall’s singing, loudly, skipping down the side of the road, one of their cooler bags swinging from his shoulder. They’re walking alongside the road leading out of Protaras. It’s still fairly early but the sun is already beating down on them, heat rising off the asphalt in waves. It’s their day off, and Louis can’t wait to spend it doing nothing but laze around on the beach.

Niall doesn’t make it very far before stopping, pushing the bag back in place on his shoulder and wiping his brow with the back of his hand. “Shit, this heat is off the walls. What do you reckon? Mid thirties?”

“Should we tell him?” Laura replies, throwing a look over her shoulder at Louis.

“Tell me what?”

“Better not.” Louis agrees, pushing his sunglasses up his nose. The sunscreen keeps making them slip down. “I’m not sure he could handle the truth.”

“Tell me what?” Niall repeats, in a sing-song voice, grinning behind his fake neon Ray-Bans as they catch up to him.

“That it’s only half ten and it’ll get hotter still.”

Niall lets out a laugh, throwing an arm over Louis’ shoulders and the other around Laura’s. “But we’ll be at the beach by then, Tommo.”

The beach they are heading to is a twenty minute walk from the town, and secluded enough to make it practically unknown to tourists. Soon enough they’re able to turn left, and after walking through a quiet neighbourhood they end up at the seafront. They make their way carefully down a steep decline and there it is, a small cove in between rocks, the water a shade of turquoise so bright it almost hurts to look at. The beach is nearly empty, only a couple of people there. A family has put up two umbrellas, the children playing in the shoreline, and another umbrella is on its own over to the far end of the small beach.

They walk quickly down the slope, flip-flops smacking against the gravel and Louis can almost _taste_ the promised relief of the cerulean waves. He is all but undressing as he walks, tugging at his top, when he spots a figure coming out of the water and nearly trips over his own fake Havaianas.

It’s Nick. Because _of course_ it is.

Of course Louis can’t be allowed to spend his day off without the addition of one disturbingly hot and equally confusing bartender. Nick is getting out of the water, pushing his hair back and Louis could swear his stomach actually does a somersault at the sight and it’s not fair. Nick is too fucking gorgeous with his stupidly long legs and that perfect amount of chest hair and Louis wouldn’t mind licking the water drops off his stomach. 

Before he knows it, Niall and Laura have dumped their things in the sand next to Nick’s, the three of them making small talk while Louis hovers in the background. He’s not prepared for this, for being around Nick with his friends present. The last time they were at a beach together still feels like a strange fever dream, doing warm and twisty things to Louis’ insides whenever he thinks about it. That was almost a week ago, and Nick hasn’t texted him since but it’s okay. Louis has been busy. At least that’s what he tells himself. Today is his first day off in a long time, and he doesn’t want to spend it wondering why Nick hasn’t bloody texted him. Especially not with him right there, wearing nothing but brightly coloured, patterned swim shorts and with his hair slicked back from his face.

“Nice umbrella, Grimshaw. Very pink.” Louis says, dropping his backpack in the sand. “Can your giant ego even fit under there? Maybe you should have brought two of them.”

“Don’t mock the umbrellas.” Niall chimes in, currently in the process of getting his own umbrella out of its bag. Laura is digging the stand into the sand, singing the working song from Snow White.

“They’re lame.” Louis quips, and when Laura loses her grip on the stand, cursing loudly, he adds on, “and too much work.”

“Heat stroke is lame.” Nick points out, loftily, “You’d know.” He shakes his towel out, efficiently covering Louis in sand, and then spreads it out so that he’s in the sun when he lies down, stretching out on his front. “Now, play nice, children. I didn’t come here to listen to you yapping in my ear all day.”

He tucks his face into the crock of his elbow, shielding his face from the sun and Louis allows himself a moment of simply looking. He’s staring at the soft skin at the back of Nick’s thighs when Niall’s flip-flop hits him in the back.

“What?”

“You’re staring.” Niall singsongs quietly, waggling his eyebrows.

Louis opens his mouth to object, a little embarrassed from having been caught ogling Nick, but Niall has already returned to getting his spot on the sand ready. Somehow, most likely because the deities of the world hate him, Louis ends up next to Nick on the sand, sandwiched between him and Niall. He feels a little self-conscious as he pulls his tank over his head and kicks his flip-flops off, even though Nick still has his eyes closed and isn’t looking at Louis. The sand is scorching under his feet, and he hops from foot to foot while he waits for Niall to strip down before they set off towards the water.

Laura joins them eventually, and they spend a long time splashing about and generally acting like kids. Louis is breathless and grinning when they return to their towels, relaxed enough to shake water out of his hair like a dog and only laugh when Nick lets out an offended “For fuck’s sake, Tomlinson.”

“I’m only making sure you don’t overheat.”

“Because you’re the expert,” Nick deadpans, turning a page in his paperback.

“Sod off,” Louis scoffs, grinning, seeing the corner of Nick’s mouth twitch as if he’s struggling not to smile. 

He lies down on his towel, trying not to pay too much attention to how close he is to Nick. Close enough to reach out and touch if he wanted to. He wants to. It doesn’t take him long to dry in the sun, leaving his skin feeling crunchy with salt from the sea. He has long ago given into the hassle of sunscreen, no longer tries to pretend he can go without, and he digs the bottle out of his bag and makes quick work of applying it everywhere he can reach. “Laura, love, would you do my back, please?” He throws a, hopefully, convincing grin in her direction and she sighs, slowly getting to her feet. She makes quick work of it, covering the spots he hasn’t been able to reach himself, and then promptly sits down in front of him, silently demanding he repeats the favour.

“Me too,” Niall pipes up, tacking on a ‘please’ and a smile at Laura’s answering sigh.

“Fine,” she grumbles, walking on her knees over to him. “But you owe me, Horan.”

Niall curses when Laura unceremoniously squirts his back with sunscreen, and then yelps when she pinches the back of his thigh and tells him to ‘stop being such a baby’. Louis watches them interact. He knows they’ve hooked up several times after that first night, after the pool game, but somehow ‘casual’ seems to be working for them. They get along great. There seems to be no weirdness or drama between them and Louis can’t help but be a little jealous. 

Laura gets to her feet, pausing when Niall wraps a hand around her ankle and responding to his sincere ‘thanks’ with an eyeroll and a smile. Louis diverts his gaze and when he glances to his right he catches Nick looking at him, book forgotten in his hands. Nick startles as their eyes meet, looks away, turning a page in his book as if on autopilot. 

“Here.” Laura hands Louis the bottle, trying to wipe the residue off her fingers with no luck. “Ew, I should have brought baby wipes or something.” 

She heads down to the shore to wash her hands, and Louis is left looking between the bottle he’s holding and the broad expanse of Nick’s back. Without thinking too much about it, he leans over and squirts a hefty dollop straight between Nick’s shoulder blades. 

The reaction is immediate, Nick does an impressive full body flinch, nearly dropping his book. “What the fuck?” He yelps, glaring at Louis. 

At least Louis assumes he’s glaring. It’s hard to tell from behind the mirrored sunglasses Nick is wearing but those are definitely his less than pleased eyebrows. “I’m only making sure you won’t burn.” He replies, trying to keep a straight face.

“Cute.” Nick deadpans, looking a little like a fish on land as he tries to twist his arm round his back and spread it out. “Well, sort this out, then.”

“What?” Louis squeaks.

“You got me all drenched in this stuff.” Nick argues.

“That’s what she said.” Niall adds, sleepily, and Louis kicks him in the shin. “Ow.”

Louis swallows, he has made a terrible mistake. Laura comes sauntering back, wringing out her wet hair, and starts laughing at the sight of Nick’s back.

“Laura, would you-” Louis begins, but Laura only starts laughing harder and he sighs in defeat.

“For fuck’s sake,” Nick sighs, “Can you just-”

“Okay, fine.” Louis cuts him off, somehow managing to get the right level of unbothered into his voice. Heart in his throat, he gets to his knees and shuffles up to Nick.

A quick glance over his shoulder tells him neither Niall nor Laura are paying attention. Niall is dozing and Laura is putting her headphones on; Louis can hear the distant thumping of the baseline. His hand hovers over Nick’s back before he gets to work. He tries to be methodical about it, using both hands to spread the lotion evenly over Nick’s shoulders, down between his shoulder blades and further still. His skin is warm against Louis’ palms, shoulders a little rosy looking. 

“You need to watch your shoulders.” Louis tells him, quietly, “They’re looking a little pink.”

Nick clears his throat, shifting under Louis’ palms. “Thanks.” He says, his voice a little rough.

“No worries.”

Louis has never noticed that Nick has freckles on his shoulders before, tiny constellations mottling the tanned skin. He wants to know what they taste like. He works the last of the lotion into Nick’s skin, reluctant to stop touching him. He can’t help but wonder what would happen if he let his hands slip lower, brushed his fingers underneath the waistband of Nick’s colourful swim shorts. He has got his hands on Nick’s lower back, drawing patterns with his fingers, he could-

Niall shifts behind him, effectively bringing Louis out of his reverie. Shit. He withdraws, noisily rubbing his hands together. “All done.” He tells Nick, relieved when it comes out sounding unaffected, and nearly throws himself down on top of his towel, turning so that he’s facing Niall.

He doesn’t miss Nick’s quiet ‘thank you’, though.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

It’s not long before the sun is high in the sky, and not even regular ventures into the water does much to cool them down. Laura joins Niall under his umbrella, leaving no space for Louis and only laughs when Louis complains.

Laura’s singing Rihanna, digging through their cooler bag in search of her lunch. “Was mine the sesame one?”

“The cheese and ham is mine,” Niall says, prodding her in the shoulder until she hands it over. Louis collects his lunch and his towel, heading over to a slight overhang in the cliffs where the rocks create a welcome reprieve from the sun. Louis likes it there. Once he’s finished his bagel he leans back on his elbows, watching the ocean through the tint of his sunglasses. He’s surprised when Nick walks over, dropping down next to him on the sand. He’s got a bag of crisps and a bottle of water clutched in one hand.

“Mind if I join you?”

“Sure.” Louis says. “As long as I can have some crisps.”

“You drive a hard bargain.” Nick says with a roll of his eyes, but holds the bag out for him. 

“It’s a cheap price to pay for my company.” Louis jokes back, stuffing his mouth full of salty crisps. There’s no immediate response, and when he looks over at Nick he finds him smiling softly, digging his toes into the sand. “What?” He gets out, even if it ends up garbled and he nearly sprays crumbs everywhere.

“Charming.” Nick chuckles, getting a handful for himself.

“You know it.” Louis replies once he’s swallowed the crisps, making grabby hands for the bag. “Give that here.”

Nearly an hour passes before they both get to their feet, Nick scrunching up the now empty bag in one hand. Louis can’t quite believe it. They’ve made some small talk, sure, but mostly they’ve been sat staring at the ocean, slowly working their way through Nick’s bag of crisps. If someone had told him a couple of weeks ago that they’d be able to sit side by side for that long without hurling insults at each other he would have laughed.

“We’re getting good at this, Grimshaw, I’m surprised.”

“Good at what?”

“Having a conversation that doesn’t end with me wanting to throttle you.”

“You’re right.” Nick grins, playing along, and it makes something in Louis’ chest swell. “I haven’t wanted to tape your mouth shut in ages.”

“Such praise.” Louis simpers, dumping his things in the sand. He fancies one more swim before they leave. If he goes now he’ll have plenty of time to dry before they should start walking back to Protaras.

“The crisps helped, I think.”

“Why?”

“Kept your mouth occupied. I don’t think we’ve ever gone this long without you insulting me.”

Laughing, Louis looks up at him only to find him smiling back. It’s a lot. For a second he contemplates reminding Nick of other times they’ve been around each other when Louis’ mouth has been...occupied.

They’re interrupted by Niall, barely audible with his face buried in the crock of his arm. Louis had thought he was asleep. “Laura, they’re doing it again.”

“Yeah.” Laura agrees. She’s curled up against Niall’s side, trying to keep out of the sun.

Louis blinks, confused. “Doing what?”

Niall doesn’t look up but Louis can hear the smile in his voice. “That thing where you pretend that you don’t get along, or want snog each other silly. It’s cute. Annoying, but cute.”

“Shut up.” Louis splutters, and he’s definitely blushing. A look over at Nick finds him looking suspiciously pink too, scratching the back of his neck.

“I haven’t heard you call Nick a knob in weeks.” Niall points out, sparing Louis a brief glance. Louis wants to kick him in the shin, or give him a hug. Possibly both.

“Knob.” He looks at Nick, too busy cataloguing Nick’s reaction to really pay attention to the way Niall’s cracking up beside him.

“Wanker.” Nick throws back, a hesitant smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

Louis finds himself smiling back, only breaking eye contact when Niall lazily attempts to throw an empty water bottle at him. He responds by dumping a handful of sand over his head as revenge, encouraged by Nick’s raucous laughter.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

Louis almost groans out loud when the cold beer hits his parched throat. It’s almost nine o’clock, and they’re all gathered at a small restaurant at the end of the main street. They made it back from the beach around five, and after a quick shower Louis promptly fell into bed, his intended nap quickly turning into a deep, exhausted slumber. He’d been asleep for close to two hours when Zayn walked through his door, demanding he get up and join all of them for dinner.

Nearly everyone is there, the only ones missing are the ones on call. Nick’s around too, looking a little pink from the sun and wearing a colourful shirt unbuttoned so low it makes Louis’ fingers itch. They’re waiting on a table big enough for all of them, hanging around the restaurant’s backyard, the strings of lights and huge potted plants creating a backdrop that looks like something from a Pinterest board.

He’s chatting to Zayn and Perrie when he spots Nick across the yard. Nick’s talking to Harry and Harry must have said something funny because Nick is losing it laughing, doubled over where he stands. Something twists and grows in Louis’ chest, and _fuck_. 

When did he fall in love with Nick Grimshaw?

A little dizzy, he turns on his heels and heads for the gate in the wall separating the garden from the street, stepping out onto the sidewalk. He lights up a cigarette, has only taken one long drag before Zayn shows up, slipping quietly through the gate. 

“Hey.”

“Hi.” Louis squeaks, and dammit.

“What’s up?” Zayn raises an eyebrow at him, asking for a cigarette without a word. Louis retrieves the pack from the side pocket of his shorts, handing it over without a word. “You alright, man?”

Alright. Louis swallows. “Sure, yeah.”

“You look a little spooked.” Zayn points out, lighting up.

Louis makes a noncommittal sound, has another drag from his cigarette. It’s not proving as calming as he’d hoped.

“Niall said you guys were hanging out with Nick today.”

“So?” Louis snaps. “You seem proper obsessed, the way you’re always going on about him.”

“We both know I’m not the one ‘obsessed’ with Nick.” Zayn points out calmly.

Suddenly too tired of the whole mess inside his chest to hide it anymore, Louis groans, leaning his forehead against Zayn’s shoulder. “Shit. Fuck.”

“Is this you finally admitting that you like him?”

Louis nods weakly, struggling against Zayn’s attempt to pull him into a sideways hug. “I’m serious. This is bad.”

“Oh, please.” Zayn chuckles, squeezing him tightly. “Nick’s totally into you.”

Louis swallows hard, trying to pretend it doesn’t sting when he replies, “He isn’t.”

Zayn scoffs, pinching Louis’ waist. “I’ve got eyes, mate. He’s-”

Zayn stops talking as Nick walks through the gate. “Tomlinson, time to get your behind, oh-”

It’s Nick’s time to trail off, hovering uncertainly right outside the gate. “Uhm, our table’s ready. Just thought I’d let you know.” Nick continues. He looks at Louis for a moment, then disappears back through the gate. Louis follows, ignoring Zayn’s smug expression. Everyone’s already crowded around a table that’s a little too small for their group, busy ordering pizzas and more drinks. Somehow, Louis ends up squished between Harry and Nick, so close their thighs are touching.

Dinner is delicious, a combination of cheesy pizzas and too many pitchers of Margaritas shared around the table. Everyone ends up more or less tipsy and stuffed to the gills, so after finishing their food they all sort of melt into boneless heaps on the outdoor sofas, talking and joking and ordering more drinks. Louis is next to Nick on a bean bag, Nick’s hand hot against his thigh, a little too high up to feel casual.

“I’m so full.” Nick groans, head tilted back against their seat.

“Same.” Louis agrees, stretching languidly to get comfortable and not missing the way Nick’s eyes track his every move.

Nick leaning in to kiss him is unexpected, but Louis moves into it without thinking twice, curling a hand loosely around Nick’s neck. He can hear Zayn whistle, cheers erupting around them, but he doesn’t care, merely sticks his middle finger up in Zayn’s general direction and keeps on kissing Nick.

It’s thrilling; kissing with other people around, not hiding around the corner out of sight. Louis knows he should probably stop to try and figure out where all this is coming from. What has made Nick change his mind, suddenly okay with being seen in public with Louis like this. He doesn’t, resolutely pushes all reason and attempts at logic aside in favor of more toe curling kisses.

It keeps happening, all throughout the night. Nick keeps kissing him, finding reasons to touch him. Louis feels completely defenseless against the sudden proximity he’s being offered, and too high on life and the fucking butterflies in his stomach to do anything but return the kisses, keep his fingers loosely tangled with Nick’s.

“Come home with me,” Nick mumbles against his temple while they’re at the bar, waiting for their turn to order.

“Yeah,” Louis agrees easily, twisting his head to connect their lips. He’s a little drunk and a lot tired but he doesn’t think either of those things can be blamed for the buzzing feeling in his limbs. That’s all Nick. His eyes and his smile and his hands and, everything, really. He’s laughing as Nick pulls him through the now crowded area, slipping out the back gate without saying goodbye to anyone. Louis’ phone pings with a new message from Zayn as they walk up the hill towards Nick’s flat, a ‘ _have fun_ ’ followed by a winking emoji. Apparently their escape hasn’t gone by completely unnoticed.

The flat is dark and empty when they walk through the door, and they don’t bother with any lights, heading straight for Nick’s bedroom. The air inside is a little muggy so Nick turns the air conditioner on before immediately turning his attention back to Louis, his hands curled around Louis’ hips. “Come here.”

“So eager.” Louis jokes, pulling his t-shirt over his head and letting it drop to the floor. He shivers under the cool breeze from the air conditioner, crowding into Nick’s space to use his body as a shield.

Nick twists his neck to look down at him, pushing a hand through his hair as he wraps his other arm around Louis’ naked back. “You’re so fit, fuck.”

Louis’ heart is possibly beating so loudly in his chest Nick might be able to hear it. He has to kiss Nick again. They manage to move into a horizontal position on the bed without injury, Nick hovering over Louis and allowing Louis to push his shirt off his shoulders.

They keep on kissing until Louis no longer knows up from down. He doesn’t know how long it’s been, only knows his lips are beginning to feel numb, his chin raw from Nick’s stubble. Nick is in an equal state, hair a complete mess from where Louis has been running his fingers through it. When Nick speaks his voice is rough, sending a thrill down Louis’ spine. He did that.

“I’ve been thinking about this all day.” Nick mumbles, nipping at the skin below Louis’ ear. Louis can feel him, hard against Louis’ hip, has to grind against him. He revels in Nick’s sharp inhalation.

“Yeah? What have you been thinking? Because I think you should fuck me.” Louis says, has barely finished the thought before the words are out. 

Nick groans, hot breath fanning against Louis’ neck. His hand, clutching Louis’ hip, tightens its hold.

“If you want.” Louis tacks on, smiling. He feels delirious, high.

“Fucking hell.” Nick laughs against his throat. “Yes. Of course.”

“Okay.” Louis is laughing too. “Just checking.” 

Things pick up the pace then, kisses a touch more frantic as they try to undress at the same time, only slowing down once Louis is naked on the bed, Nick still in his pants.

“You’re not naked.” Louis shivers as Nick closes his lips around his nipple before continuing trailing kisses down his torso. “Focus, Grimshaw. Why am I the only one naked?”

“You’re so fucking hot.” Nick mumbles, squeezing Louis’ arse while he kisses his stomach, blowing softly over his dick and making Louis’ hands twitch at his sides, grasping at the sheets.

Louis moans, back arching, when Nick sucks him down without a warning; wet, hot heat enveloping his dick. Nick’s hand is stroking his balls, his inner thigh, pushing his leg up the bed. Louis wasn’t prepared for suddenly feeling so exposed, nerves fluttering in his stomach when Nick pushes the pad of his thumb against his hole, licking a broad strip up his dick. Nick pulls off and then sits back on his haunches between Louis’ spread legs. Louis shifts on the bed, skin prickling hotly from the way Nick’s eyes roam over him.

“What are you looking at?” Louis blurts out, when seconds trickle past and Nick’s still looking, fingers absentmindedly tracing circles on Louis’ knee.

Nick seems to shake out of whatever stupor he was in, his grin quick and sharp before he leans in for a kiss. “You.”

Louis rolls his eyes, but he can feel the blush creep up his neck. He watches Nick reach for the lube, hidden amongst the magazines and other things Nick keeps on top of a chair by the bed.

“Had that close by, huh?” He teases, laughing when Nick pinches his waist.

“Shut up.”

“Make me,” Louis quips and it’s cheesy but it works, Nick licking his way into his mouth. The snick of the cap seems to echo in the room, and Louis’ dick twitches. This is really happening. Nick sits back up, pushing the leg Louis had wrapped around his hip, silently urging him to spread them further. His hand is warm, stroking slowly, teasingly down Louis thigh, and Louis exhales shakily at the first press of a slicked up finger against his hole. Nick pauses, eyes dark as they lock with his, but then the pressure is back, steady and insistent. Louis wills himself to relax, shifting on the bed.

“This isn’t-” Nick pauses. “You’ve done this before, right?”

Louis nods, gasping when Nick pushes the tip of his finger inside. “Yes, come on,” he wiggles his hips. “I’m not some blushing virgin, Grimshaw, get on with it.”

“I know you’re not.” Nick points out. Louis doesn’t understand how Nick can sound so calm when Louis feels like every nerve ending in his body is fizzling. “But this is different, I want-”

Nick cuts off with a groan as Louis reaches out to cup him through his pants, tracing the shape of his dick with his fingers. He doesn’t want to talk anymore. It’s unexpected, Nick worrying about him this way, and if he keeps going on with that earnest expression on his face then Louis might actually melt into a puddle. He has done this part before, he’s not lying. He dated a guy, Luke, during his first year of college and they were each other’s bumbling firsts. Lots of firsts, some less memorable than others. This feels different, weighted somehow. Nick’s still fingering him, carefully adding a second finger to the careful stretch, twisting his fingers in a way that has Louis moaning.

Nick keeps working him open, kissing his neck, his chest, his stomach. Louis feels on fire, might have been a little embarrassed by the way he’s unable to keep quiet if it didn’t feel so good. He distracts himself with trying to push Nick’s pants down his hips, wanting him naked too.

“Nick,” he gasps as Nick curls his fingers, sending sparks up Louis’ spine. “Come on.”

“You okay?” Nick asks, nipping at his neck. He doesn’t sound so unaffected anymore. “Ready?”

“Yes.” Louis nods, twisting his neck to grant him better access.

Nick pulls out, steadying himself with one arm next to Louis’ head on the bed as he gets out of his pants. He gets to his feet, and Louis watches him walk over to the dresser and return with a condom, takes over the task of getting the packaging open when Nick’s grip keeps slipping and he’s growing visibly frustrated.

“Come here,” Louis demands, sitting up to roll the condom over Nick’s erection, giving Nick a squeeze as he does.

“Fuck,” Nick curses hoarsely, forehead coming to rest on Louis’ shoulder, hips jerking into Louis’ hold. “Don’t. I’m gonna come if you keep doing that.”

Louis takes pity on him, twisting his neck in silent demand to be kissed. It works, Nick’s tongue hot and slick against his. Louis falls back against the mattress, pulling Nick on top of him. “Can we do it like this?”

Nick nods against his throat, reaching blindly for one of his pillows. Eager to get to it, Louis lifts his hips and lets Nick push it underneath him.

“You look so good.” Nick says, quietly, fingers dancing up Louis’ thigh.

Louis’ lips tug into a smile, thrown by the sincerity in Nick’s eyes. He bites down on his lip, gasping when Nick carefully pushes inside, wincing a little at the stretch.

“Tell me to stop.” Nick chokes out, clutching Louis’ hip. “If you need me to.”

“I’ll be fine.” Louis reassures him. Nick feels so big like this but he knows it’ll be good. He forces himself to relax, exhaling slowly. “Give me a second.”

Nick stills immediately, reaching to add more lube, wiping his hand on the sheets once he’s done. Louis curls a hand around Nick’s lower arm, the other around his neck, charmed when Nick catches his hand and pins it to the mattress next to Louis’ head, their fingers intertwined.

It’s a lot, the stretch and burn and the feeling of Nick hovering over him, Nick’s hand in his. They’re both breathing heavily by the time Nick is fully inside, pulling in deep lungfuls of air. Nick’s eyes are closed, his forehead creased in concentration, and Louis can’t get enough of him.

“You okay?” Nick asks, shifting his hips when Louis nods.

“Yes,” Louis groans, sparks dancing up his spine. He’s getting hard again, dick fattening up more with every minute twitch of Nick’s hips. 

Nick starts moving, setting a slow, deep pace. It’s good, so good. Louis pushes back against him, moaning when Nick moves closer until they’re chest to chest, Louis’ dick trapped between their stomachs. Nick’s breath is hot against Louis’ neck, kisses pressed to his collarbone. Louis digs his heels into Nick’s thighs, urging him on, arching when Nick switches up the angle.

“Harder,” he gasps, satisfied when Nick picks up pace. He can’t stop touching Nick, hands roaming his back, his sides, curling in his hair. He can tell Nick is getting close when his movements grow erratic. Louis isn’t that far behind. “So fucking good,” he mumbles, scratching his fingers up Nick’s back. They’re both clammy with sweat and it should feel gross but Louis only wants more. Wants to be closer. “You feel so good.”

“Fucking amazing.” Nick groans, nearly pushing Louis up the mattress with each thrust. “Lou.”

Louis revels in the broken sound he pulls out of Nick as he puts a hand on Nick’s arse, pulling him closer, gapsing when Nick’s dick brushes against his spot. “Right there, fuck.”

Nick does as he’s told, keeps going until he comes with a cry, panting hotly against Louis’ throat. It’s so hot Louis barely knows what to do with himself, stroking a hand soothingly across Nick’s shoulders, moaning when Nick shifting sends a new rush of sparks through his system. It seems to bring Nick out of his stupor. Louis grimaces at the feeling when he pulls out, reaching down to touch himself while he watches Nick dispose of the condom. Nick bats his hand away seconds later, and Louis can almost feel his eyes roll back in his head when Nick finally touches him, wrapping a hand around him and beginning to wank him off, hard and fast. It doesn’t take very long for him to tumble over the edge, covering his stomach and chest in come. Nick kisses him through it, doesn’t stop wanking him until Louis is pushing at his hand, twitching and oversensitive. 

He’s still panting, head spinning, when Nick plasters himself to Louis’ side, kissing him deeply. Louis does his best to return the kiss, nipping at Nick’s plump bottom lip. They kiss for a while, kisses growing slower and slower until they’re mostly sharing air. Nick sighs, hiding his face against Louis’ shoulder, causing Louis’ heart to swell three sizes. 

Louis stretches languidly. Sweat trickles down his temple, tickling his face, as he waits for his heartbeat to slow down. He turns his head, opening his eyes a smidge to get a look at Nick. 

Nick’s eyes are closed, his eyelashes fanning out against his cheeks. He looks comfortable, his features relaxed in slumber. His arm is stretched across Louis’ chest, heavy and too warm, but Louis doesn’t want him to move. He reaches out to carefully push Nick’s hair back from his forehead, holding his breath when Nick moves into the touch. He’s so, so in love with Nick and he doesn’t know how it happened. Doesn’t need an explanation. The words are at the tip of his tongue, but he swallows them down. Nick’s breathing slowly, seemingly nearly asleep, and Louis should get up and leave.

He does get up, but he doesn’t leave. He heads for the bathroom, using a towel to clean himself up the best he can and stealing some toothpaste to rinse out his mouth. Nick’s definitely asleep once he returns, and Louis barely dares breathing as he slips back into bed, moving closer until he’s nestled against Nick’s side. He falls asleep in no time.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

Louis wakes up too hot, grimacing at the way he’s sticking to the sheets. He shifts, trying to free himself from the sweaty covers and only then does he realise he’s not in his own bed. Nick’s fast asleep next to him, his face is relaxed in sleep, and Louis’ eyes are drawn to the way his eyelashes curl at the tips. He has to dig his fingers into his palm to keep from reaching out to touch.

He wants to stay right there, but soon the need to piss wins out and he quietly extracts himself from the sheets, pulling on his shorts. The apartment is quiet when he steps out into the hallway, the door to Nick’s flatmate’s bedroom slightly ajar. They’re alone.

He makes quick business of relieving himself, splashing his face and neck with water when he’s done. His hair is a mess, and he pulls at his fringe in an useless attempt to make it look presentable. There’s a beat up clock on the living room wall, the blue plastic frame a little cracked, as if it’s ended up on the floor at least once. It reads half eight, it’s early still. Louis doesn’t have to be at the hotel until after lunch.

There’s a part of him that knows he has probably overstayed his welcome, but he’s still hesitant to leave. In the end want wins over should, and he walks into the kitchen in search of tea. The kettle whirs to life, loud in the otherwise silent apartment and Louis winces, wishing he had shut the door to Nick’s bedroom behind him. He finds two mugs and a couple of teabags easily enough, setting everything out on the counter.

It looks like yet another sunny day. Most of the patio is still in shadow, but there’s not a single cloud in the sky when he walks up to the glass door to have a look. Twisting the lock he pushes the door open carefully, wary of the way the hinges creak. He has barely stepped outside when he spots them, immediately freezing in his spot.

The cat hisses, watching him with narrowed, yellow eyes from her curled up position on one of the rickety chairs. Their position, actually. She’s got three tiny kittens cuddled up against her, nursing hungrily and Louis nearly melts at the sight. The kittens must be newborn; from the look of it, none of them have opened their eyes. The little family is curled on top of a beach towel, Louis recognising it as the one Nick was using yesterday at the beach. He must have hung it outside to dry, and now it’s been adopted as a baby blanket.

“No worries,” he reassures the cat, taking a step back. “You can stay right there, I’m not going to steal your babies, I promise.”

Pleased she’s not making a run for it he backs away, silently begging she won’t run off while he’s inside. There’s no stopping the smile nearly splitting his face in two. He hurries back inside, through the living room and inside the bedroom. Nick’s still asleep, snoring lightly, and Louis wastes no time.

“Nick.” He gives Nick’s shoulder a shake. “Wake up.” Nick barely stirs, hiding his face deeper in the pillow. “Come on, wake up.”

Nick mumbles something, but then jolts awake when Louis shakes him again.

“What? Louis?” He looks up, a grumpy expression on his face that is too cute for Louis to handle this early in the morning, but there’s no time to think about how good he looks right now.

“You need to come outside, right now.”

“Why?” Nick croaks, scrubbing a hand over his face tiredly. “I’m sleeping.”

“Get up, get up, get up.” Louis chants, pulling at the sheets. “You need to see this.”

“What is it?”

“Just come outside and you’ll see.” Louis grins, only smiling wider when Nick tries to keep a hold of the sheet. “Come on, Grimshaw. I promise it’ll be worth it.”

“Oh for fuck’s sake, fine.” Nick groans. “You are the bloody worst, do you know that? What time is it?”

“Yeah, yeah. I’m awful,” Louis agrees. “Now get up.” He’s practically bouncing in his spot as Nick shuffles out of bed, throwing a pair of pants at him when he doesn’t move fast enough.

“Stop it.” Nick grumbles, offering Louis a nice view of his arse before he puts on the pants. It’s a cute arse. Perhaps Louis shouldn’t have been so quick to throw items of clothing at him.

The kettle has already come to a boil when they leave the bedroom, the only sound in the apartment coming from the birds outside. Louis walks ahead, confident Nick will follow.

“Why are you-”

Nick trails off at the sight of the cats, his jaw dropping.

“You’re a grandad!” He laughs. Nick looks a little shocked. “Oh, be careful she-”

It’s his turn to be surprised as Nick crouches down in front of the chair. The cat is watching him intensely, but she’s not hissing at him the way she did at Louis.

“Wow.” Nick breathes out. Louis has never seen that look of awe on his face before. “Look.”

“Yeah, I know.” Louis agrees, carefully moving into a similar position next to him.

“They look okay, don’t they?” 

“They look fine to me.”

The cat is still watching them and Louis holds his breath as Nick slowly reaches out to pet her head. She doesn’t look very impressed, but allows him to scratch her behind the ear. “You did so good.” Nick tells her quietly, and Louis swears something in his chest melts. Fuck. “Look at your pretty babies.”

“I don’t think you can count on getting your towel back anytime soon.”

Only then does Nick seem to catch on. “I think you’re right.” He agrees, with a smile so bright it nearly knocks Louis off his feet. It quickly morphs into concern. “They’re quite high off the ground like that, aren’t they? They’re all blind, what if they take a tumble?”

“Maybe we could find them something else.” Louis suggests “She obviously thinks it’s safe enough, but maybe if we put something behind the chair, in the corner?”

“I think I have a box or summat somewhere.” Nick says, standing back up straight and shaking his leg to get some blood back in his feet. “Ow. Maybe we could move them? If we’re careful?”

“Sure.” Louis is desperately trying, and failing, not to be horribly endeared by Nick’s fretting.

“She must be hungry.” Nick continues, before turning his attention back to the cats. “Aren’t you, sweetheart? Let’s get you some breakfast, huh?”

They head back inside, Nick obviously reluctant to part with the little family even for a moment. It’s not until they’re in the kitchen that Louis remembers the kettle. Nick has noticed too.

“I was, uh, making tea.” He explains, and adamant not to make it awkward he flicks the kettle back on. Nick watches it for a while, but then opens the fridge without commenting. Louis puts a teabag in each mug, watching Nick scoop cat food onto a plate and fill up a small tupperware with water. He hangs back when Nick heads outside with the food and water, waiting for the kettle.

Nick returns quickly, and Louis can hear him rummage through one of the built in wardrobes in the hallway. He comes back with a plastic crate, holding it up with a tentative shrug.

“Do you think this will do?” Nick asks. “Nicked it from the supermarket down the street awhile back.”

“I do.” Louis replies, pouring water into the cups before pulling the fridge open in search of milk. There’s only soy milk. “Do you not have real milk? Seriously?”

“Seeing as I’m lactose intolerant, it would be a bit of a waste.” Nick replies, absentmindedly. “I could make it comfier, put in another towel or something.”

Louis blinks, confused, then realises that Nick’s no longer talking about what to put in his tea. “Yeah, let’s try that.” He agrees, pouring water into both cups and, after a moment’s consideration, topping both of them up with soy milk. He has a taste, grimacing. That had been a bad idea. “This tastes like dough.”

“Stop whining, it’s good.” Nick calls back, from somewhere in the apartment.

“It’s really, really not.” Louis mumbles, quietly, but still brings both mugs out on the patio, his attention immediately drawn to the cats. 

The mother is scarfing down the food Nick has placed just below the chair. She pauses to watch Louis warily as he carefully puts both mugs down on the table and then moves the empty chair out of the way. Nick follows with the crate and a blanket, carefully arranging them in the corner against the wall. He then, carefully, lifts the towel with the squeaking kittens and deposits them in the crate. The mother immediately abandons her food to check on her babies. They watch her circle around them for a moment before she eventually settles down on top of the towel. Louis can practically hear Nick breathe a sigh of relief.

“She seems okay with it.” He says, handing Nick a mug of tea. “Now have some tea, granddad.”

“I’m not a granddad.” Nick objects, sipping his tea. “I’m only 24. I’m more of a cool uncle.”

Louis laughs. “Whatever helps you sleep at night,” he pauses for effect, “granddad.”

“Rude.” Nick replies, but he’s grinning and Louis finds himself grinning back.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

Zayn corners him in their office later. Louis is there to drop off their statistics for James and finds Zayn sat in front of one of the computers, speaking slowly to someone on the phone. He gets to his feet at the sight of Louis, quickly moving between Louis and the door while Louis leaves his folder on James’ desk.

“Yes. Tomorrow.” Zayn says, rolling his eyes at the person on the other end, leaning back against the door with a smug smile on his face when Louis tries to pass him. “Yes. Tomorrow. Ten o’clock. No problem, we’re happy to help. Bye.”

He hangs up, pocketing the phone and Louis sees his opportunity to strike. He digs his fingers into Zayn’s ribs, tickling him, and nearly manages to push Zayn away from the door.

“No,” Zayn laughs, thrashing in Louis’ hold. He ends up sliding down to the floor, somehow managing to keep his back to the door. “No, ah, stop.”

“I have stuff to do.” Louis is laughing too. How could he not? He feels as if he’s walking three feet off the ground, floating on air, and he can’t stop smiling. “Are you gonna let me out?”

“No.” Zayn giggles, curled into a fetal position on the floor in a vain attempt to escape Louis’ fingers. Taking pity on him, Louis stops his attempts to tweak Zayn’s nipple, sitting down on the floor with his back against a cabinet. He holds his hands up in surrender when Zayn looks up, and then watches his friend slowly uncurl himself and sit up, still with his back to the door.

“So,” Zayn grins, nudging his foot with his own. “Last night was fun.”

Louis blushes, heat pooling in his stomach as the memories come rushing back. “It was,” he agrees, picking at the bracelet on his wrist.

“Still convinced Nick doesn’t like you?” Zayn asks, eyebrows raised. “He was all over you, and unless you slept in a ditch I’d say you spent the night at his, yeah?”

Louis shrugs, but he’s smiling. He has to put some effort into not squealing like a child, hiding his face against his drawn up knees. “I like him so much, fuck.”

“Lou has a boyfriend.” Zayn laughs, pulling him into an awkward sideways hug, causing Louis to nearly topple over. “This is great.”

“Not too sure about the ‘boyfriend’ part.” Louis protests, even though he wants nothing more than to agree.

“Details,” Zayn tells him, loosening his hold a little. “Small, irrelevant details.”

Louis is about to reply when the door is suddenly opened, sending Zayn tumbling backwards and Louis sprawled half on top of him. They both squint against the brightness of the outdoors, looking up at a very confused James.

“Do I even want to know?” James sighs, but he’s smiling and Louis can’t stop the laughter from spilling out. Zayn is laughing too, his chest heaving with silent giggles. 

“Oh well, at least you’re wearing clothes.”

 

 

XOXO

 

 

_Can I come over?_

Louis sends the text as he walks out the hotel gates, Harry next to him. They have survived another Backwards Dinner with the kids and even if they’re both covered in food stains he’s going to count tonight as a success. His phone pings with a response almost immediately. 

_Sure_

_Need a shower but I’ll be there in 30_ , Louis replies, trying, and failing, to keep the grin off his face.

“Is that Nick?” Harry asks, taking a swig from his water bottle. “Tell him I said hi.”

“Tell him yourself.” Louis replies, right as his phone pings with a new message.

_I like you dirty_

Fuck. Louis’ stomach twists hotly, and he has to make an effort as he types out his reply.

_Im covered in spag bol and ice cream atm. Not very sexy_

_Mm, pasta_ , Nick texts back, together with a whole row of food related emojis. Louis is in love with a weirdo.

He showers in record time once they get back to the flat, slipping under Harry’s arm when they walk through the door in order to get in the bathroom first. He locks the door to the sound of Harry’s affronted ‘hey’, cackling loudly, and then gives himself a quick scrub under the lukewarm spray.

He’s humming as he gets dressed, towelling his hair dry as he texts with his mum. He’s out the door with ten minutes to spare, flip flops beating a chipper rhythm against the ground as he hurries up the hill.

Nick opens the door within seconds of him knocking, looking soft and comfortable in cut off joggers and a holey t-shirt. The tv is playing in the living room, the only source of light in the flat. “Took you long enough,” he drawls, leaning against the doorjamb. 

“All clean now,” Louis tells him, moving into Nick’s personal space, pleased when Nick’s hands immediately go to his waist. “Time to get dirty,” he sings, attentive of the way Nick’s eyes light up at the reference. He brushes a hand up Nick’s arm, his neck, touching the soft hair at the back of his neck. Still amazed he gets to touch Nick like this, for no other reason than the simple pleasure of feeling skin on skin. “Hi.”

“Hello,” Nick replies, and his stubble against Louis’ chin as they kiss is enough to have Louis inching closer, wanting more.

He kisses his way down the column of Nick’s throat, mouthing at the stubble, pausing to suck a mark into the soft skin where Nick’s throat meets his clavicle. Nick’s hands are everywhere, stroking his back, slipping lower to push their groins together. Louis is getting hard already, feels as if he's been halfway there for most of the day, thinking about last night. Dizzy with want, he allows Nick to push him up against the wall. They grind against each other, Louis reveling in the hot drag of Nick’s erection against his own through the layers of cotton. 

“Are we doing this here?” He tilts his head to the side, hissing when Nick sinks his teeth into his neck. 

“Maybe?” Nick mumbles against his neck, soothing the nip with his soft lips and deft tongue, sending shivers down Louis spine.

“You have a nice bed.” Louis replies, slipping a hand down the back of Nick’s t-shirt, scratching lightly. “Wouldn’t want it to feel left out.”

“Good point.”

Louis follows as Nick starts walking backwards, stealing kisses when the opportunity presents itself, carefully steering him round the corner. The lights are on inside, the room unusually tidy. There are fresh sheets on the bed too, Louis notices, and he’s flooded with images of Nick pottering about the flat, tidying up and changing the sheets. Impatient, he pushes Nick’s shoulder until he gets the message, sitting down on the bed. Louis steps between his thighs, reaching for the hem of Nick’s t-shirt, pulling it over his head. “Lie back, please.” Louis tells him, quietly, climbing onto the bed to follow Nick as he moves back. Nick opens his mouth as if to say something, but then lies back against the pillows, arms behind his head.

Louis throws a leg over his hip, straddling him, hands going to the elastic waistband of Nick’s shorts. He tucks his fingers behind it, noticing the shiver that runs through Nick at the touch. “You’re so bloody fit,” he tells him, spreading his fingers, stroking both palms over Nick’s lower stomach, his sides.

Nick makes a sound of protest, one hand wrapping around Louis’ right wrist, halting his movements. Louis raises an eyebrow in question, silently daring him to argue, surprised when Nick pushes into a sitting position and kisses him. Louis lets himself be sidetracked by deep, slick kisses, tugged closer until he’s hovering above Nick on his elbows. He’s still hard, is effectively reminded of the fact when Nick slips both hands down his shorts, palming his arse, pushing their erections together.

“Fuck.” Louis breathes out, resting his forehead against Nick’s. “Hold on.”

Louis sits back up, pushing his own shorts down before reaching for Nick’s. It’s a little awkward, trying to get both pairs out of the way without leaving his position astride Nick’s thighs, but it’s so, so worth it. Nick’s not wearing underwear, his dick flushed and hard against his stomach. Louis reaches out to wrap a hand around him, enjoying the familiar, heavy weight of Nick in his palm. He strokes him roughly, gasping when Nick reaches to return the favor.

“So good, shit, let me-” Louis moans, hips stuttering. He finds the lube in its usual place. His hands are shaking as he uncaps the bottle, pouring a generous amount into his palm. Nick moans, loudly, as Louis reaches down to coat both of them in lube, trying to wrap his hand around both of them at once. He’s still watching Louis, eyes dark, and it’s unusual, Nick being this passive and letting Louis set the pace. “You good?”

“Mhm.” Nick hums, pulling him into yet another kiss, licking his way inside Louis’ mouth, one hand curled around Louis’ nape. 

The position puts them chest to chest, dicks trapped between them, the wet slide of the lube so, so good. Spreading his thighs Louis presses closer, moving his hips in circles in search of more friction. Nick’s panting against his ear, hands on Louis’ sides, urging him closer. Louis picks up his pace, moaning brokenly as Nick slides a hand down his crack, fingers dancing over his rim. “Fuck, yes.” The slick, slippery slide of the lube is almost too good, too much, and soon he can do nothing but try to get enough air into his lungs, hips moving desperately against Nick’s.

Nick groans, scrambling for purchase on the bed, pushing back against Louis, one dry finger still pushing against Louis’ hole. 

Louis didn’t know sex could be like this, hot and too much and comfortable at the same time. He makes a sound of protest as Nick pulls his hand away, quickly covering Louis’ hand with his to steal some of the lube that’s almost dripping from his fingers and then it’s back, circling Louis’ rim, making him go cross eyed with how good it feels when he slips the tip of a finger inside him.

Louis can’t think straight, can barely focus on anything but the throbbing, burning need to come. His heart is pounding in his chest, so hard he can feel it at the back of his throat and it’s almost too much, too intense. He digs his fingers into Nick’s arm. His other hand scrambles for purchase on the sheets, allowing him to speed up the pace of his thrusts. There are zaps of lightning shooting up his spine, making his limbs tingle. “Fuck, Nick.” He’s panting against Nick’s collarbone, breathes a little easier when Nick puts a hand on the back of his head, nails scratching his scalp. Nick’s lips are soft against Louis’ temple, brushing the skin.

“You good?”

“So good. Always so fucking good with you.” Louis chokes out, lightheaded with want and so in love he might be glowing with it. “Love it. Love you.”

Louis comes with a cry, shuddering apart on top of Nick. Heavy limbed, he manages to get a hand on Nick’s dick, dimly aware of Nick following him over the edge, his fingers digging into Louis’ neck. Seconds trickle by. Louis swallows, throat parched, and somehow manages to work up enough control of his limbs to roll off Nick. He ends up on his back on the bed, staring at the ceiling. His heart's still racing, beating a furious tattoo against his ribs. He told Nick he loved him. Fuck. He couldn’t have acted more like the heroine of a romance novel if he’d planned it. His chuckle echoes in the otherwise silent room.

He pushes his sweaty fringe back from his face, stealing a glimpse of Nick. Nick’s got his eyes closed, chest heaving. Louis lets his own eyes fall shut, drifting for a while. He feels dipped in gold and an absolute mess, sweaty and covered in lube and come. Grimacing, he reaches for a corner of the sheet, wiping himself down. Finished, he tugs at the sheet and wipes at Nick’s stomach, startled when Nick jumps at the touch.

“Sorry,” Louis grins, resting on his side with his head propped up on his hand. “You got a little something there.”

“I got it.” Nick says, awkwardly reaching over the edge of the bed for a t-shirt, giving himself a cursory wipedown.

“That was…” Louis trails off, not sure how to put it into words. He told Nick he loves him, can hear the words echoing over and over in his head. 

“Yeah.” Nick says, without looking at him, and Louis can tell something’s off. Nick sits up with his back against the wall, eyes glued to his hands in his lap. “Will you make sure the door locks behind you when you leave?”

Louis stomach drops, and for a moment he can only stare. “What?”

“I’m knackered, so…” Nick trails off, meets his eyes briefly before looking away, scratching the back of his neck.

“Right.” Louis swallows, hard, pushing himself into a sitting position. “You want me to leave.”

It comes out sounding quite calm and he’s surprised.

Nick clears his throat. “That was… it makes no sense for you to like, spend the night. It’s not like we’re a thing. We said casual, yeah? ”

Nick doesn’t look like he even believes what he’s saying himself, pulling the sheet over his lap. He’s still not looking at Louis and Louis is experiencing a horrible feeling of deja vu. There’s a block of ice in the pit of his stomach, growing colder with every second that ticks by without Nick looking at him. 

“Are you kidding me right now?”

Nick shoots him a brief glance, before looking back down on his hands. “About what?”

“We moved past ‘casual’ weeks ago and you bloody well know it. If this is about what I said-”

That seem to shake Nick out of whatever stupor he was in. His head jerks up, and he cuts Louis off with a voice devoid of emotion. “Did we?” He scoffs. “I must not have gotten that memo. We fuck, okay? It’s nothing serious. Just a bit of fun.”

Louis laughs, but it comes out bitter and without humor. This is not how tonight was supposed to play out. His chest hurts. He’s still reeling from how fucking in love he is, how good it was, and Nick might not be shoving him out the door but it feels as if he is. 

“Right. Fun. I’ve had about all the fun I can manage for one night.” Louis manages to get out, clenching his jaw shut so tightly his teeth are grinding together. He snatches his pants off the floor, stepping into them with trembling legs and then moves around the room to get the rest of his stuff together, nearly yelling in frustration when his phone falls out of his pocket and he has to stop and pick it up. He looks around for his shoes, until he remembers they’re out in the hallway. Nick isn’t saying anything, but when Louis turns towards him he catches him looking, and Nick quickly diverts his gaze. 

He stops by the door, still hoping Nick will say something but when silence stretches out between them, heavy and awkward, he’s the one to give in first. He slams the door shut behind him, wishing it gave him some satisfaction.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

Louis walks quickly, almost jogging when he finally reaches their building and climbs the stairs to his flat. The sharp-edged block of ice is growing growing colder in his chest, crawling up his throat and he swallows it down, lips pressed firmly together, until it feels like his ribs might shatter in order to make room for the pressure building behind them.

His hands shake as he searches the pockets of his shorts for his keys. His phone is there, a crumpled up receipt, but no keys. Shit. He rests his forehead against the door for a few seconds and just breathes, swallowing again around the sob that is lodged in his throat. He knocks, arms wrapped tightly around his torso as he waits, physically trying to keep himself together and praying to whatever deity who might be listening for Zayn to be awake. He doesn’t want to face Harry right now, would have preferred to sneak in completely undetected, but that’s obviously not happening. He knocks again, has barely had time to lower his hand when the lock turns and the door is pulled open.

“Lou?”

It’s Zayn, eyeing him carefully from the other side of the threshold. It’s obvious from his rumpled appearance that he’d been in bed already and fuck, Perrie might be around still.

“Hey,” Louis croaks out, cringing at the sound of his own voice. “Sorry, couldn’t find my keys, must have left them-”

“Are you okay?” Zayn interrupts, eyes clouded with worry when Louis looks up briefly. “Mate-“

“I’m fine.” Louis snaps, walking past him and trying to kick his flip-flops off without stopping. He nearly trips over his own feet, but it barely makes him pause as he scrambles for the privacy of his room.

“You’re not though,” Zayn objects from behind him, “Is it Nick? What -“

Louis ignores the questions and slams the door shut once he’s inside his room. It’s hot in there but he doesn’t bother to try and find the remote for the air conditioner, simply curls in on himself on the bed, burying his face in one of his pillows. It feels like he can’t breathe properly, chest still too tight and he’s so focused on not breaking into a million pieces that he barely hears the soft knock on his door.

“Lou,” Zayn pushes the door open hesitantly, speaking softly and Louis can feel his eyes starting to burn at the concern in his voice. “Can I come in?”

Louis doesn’t reply, but soon the mattress dips behind him as Zayn sits down, a hand coming to rest on his arm, squeezing lightly. There’s the sound of Zayn rummaging around on his bedside table, and then the air conditioner whirs to life.

“Can I get you anything?”

Louis shakes his head, doesn’t trust his voice.

“Move over.” Zayn nudges him in the back with his hip. “I want a cuddle.”

“What about Perrie?” Louis objects, voice hoarse, but still scoots closer to the wall. His eyes are burning and he squeezes them shut, desperately trying not to cry, clutching the sheets so tightly it’s almost painful. 

Zayn makes himself comfortable next to Louis, pushing a pillow behind his head and stretching his arm out above Louis. “She left a while ago, has an early morning tomorrow. Come on, don’t leave me hanging,” he implores, and Louis fucking loves him to pieces.

He shuffles around, pushing his face into Zayn’ ribs with his arms wrapped around himself. Zayn smells of laundry detergent and smoke, and Louis breathes him in, exhaling shakily against his torso.

“There we go.” Zayn murmurs, arm wrapping around Louis’ shoulder. “Wanna talk about it?”

“No,” Louis cringes as his voice breaks around the word, humiliation colouring his cheeks. It’s not fair that he’s this fucked up over Nick fucking Grimshaw. The sob that’s been lodged in his throat is tearing its way up, and he doesn’t have the energy to keep it down. “Fuck,” he croaks, clutching at Zayn’s tank with a shaking hand as a few treacherous tears slip out despite his efforts.

“Okay.” Zayn agrees quietly, using his free hand to card through Louis’ hair; pushing his fringe back, fingernails scratching Louis’ scalp gently. “Love you, bro.”

Louis cries.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

The next morning Louis wakes up from a fitful sleep. He has a vague memory of Zayn getting up at some point, but isn’t sure if it was this morning or in the middle of the night. For the first time he wishes he didn’t have a half day off work. Usually he counts down the hours until his days off, but today he’d appreciate the distraction. Anything to keep his mind off the fact that Nick doesn’t like him back. It sits like a leaden weight in his chest, somewhere behind his breastbone, making it hard to breathe. 

He ends up taking a long shower, scrubbing angrily at his skin, wishing he could do the same with his brain. His stupid heart. Throat burning, he stays under the spray until the urge to cry has lessened. He’s alone in the flat, knows he shares his half day off with Niall and feels bad about leaving Niall’s text asking him if he wants to hang out unanswered. Whatever, he’s too tired.

He’s staring at his cereal slowly going soggy in its bowl when there’s a knock on the door. Thinking it’s Niall he gets to his feet slowly, unlocking the door without checking first.

It’s Nick. Louis’ stomach drops to somewhere level with his knees. Nick looks good. A little unshaven and tired but still good. He’s got on those blue shorts that Louis really likes, the ones that make his legs look so good. Louis wants to shut the door in his face.

“Hi.” Nick says, after a beat, and he looks almost nervous. Louis doesn’t know what to say, so in the end he stays quiet. “I’ve, uh, I found your keys. These are yours, right?” Nick holds them out for him.

Louis accepts the keys from him, putting them in his pocket. “Thanks.” He wants Nick to leave, wants him to stay. Wants to shake him so hard his teeth rattle or kiss him or both. “Was that all?” He says instead, pretending he can’t hear the way his voice comes out sounding shaky.

Nick blinks, opens his mouth to say something and then closes it again. Then, “Uhm, yeah.” He clears his throat, looks down the landing before continuing. “I have to go to work so.” He takes a step back, hands in the pockets of his shorts.

“Right.” Louis nods. His head feels heavy, as if his neck might dislocate if he moves too quickly. “Well, then.”

“Do you wanna-”

They both stop speaking at the same time, and Louis prompts Nick to go on with a lift of his eyebrow.

“I could text you? When I’m done for the day?”

For a moment Louis can only stare, thinking he must have heard him wrong. “Why?”

Nick shifts his weight. “You know, we could-”

“Are you fucking serious right now?” Louis gapes, anger twisting hotly in the pit of his stomach.

“That’s-”

He doesn’t wait for Nick to finish his sentence before slamming the door shut, hoping it hits Nick in his gorgeous fucking face. The anger lasts the whole way back inside his bedroom before it simmers out, once again turning into the heaviness he’s been carrying around all morning. Being in love isn’t what he thought it would be.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

It’s with a groggy sense of deja vú that Louis wakes up at four o’clock in the morning, three days later, his phone blaring next to him. He hasn’t been asleep for that long, remembers checking the time around two. He’d been tossing and turning for two hours by then, after having spent the evening playing FIFA in Zayn’s room, trying to pretend like he wasn’t miserable and failing, well, miserably. Nick’s name is on the screen and Louis watches it until the call disconnects. It starts ringing again almost immediately, and he stares at it for a few more seconds before he swipes right. He shouldn’t, but he does it anyway.

It’s surprisingly quiet on Nick’s end. “What do you want?” Louis says, finally.

“Hi.” Nick replies, his voice slow like syrup. “Hey.”

“It’s the middle of the night, Nick.” Louis sighs as he sits up in bed, turning sideways to lean back against the wall. 

“I can’t sleep.” Nick says. “I miss you.”

Louis’ heart nearly stops beating inside his chest. Nick doesn’t miss him, that’s a lie. “You don’t.”

“I do.”

“You’re drunk.”

“I was.” Nick agrees. “Am. I don’t know. I don’t feel great.”

“Then go to bed instead of calling me.” Louis sighs, rubbing his eyes. He’s so tired and his chest has gone tight from the sound of Nick’s voice and he’s so, so sick of that horrible feeling.

“No, you don’t understand.” Nick mumbles, and it’s obvious he’s trying really hard to enunciate properly. “It’s all you.”

“What?” Louis puts a hand against his breastbone, pushing back against the pressure lodged behind it. “You’re not making any sense. I have to go.”

“Don’t.” Nick says, suddenly sounding a lot more alert. “I’m trying to-”

“What are you-”

“You’re in my head.” Nick cuts him off with a weak chuckle. “All the time. Too much.”

“Nick, you can’t-” Louis’ throat burns. “You can’t keep doing this.”

“Do what?”

“You can’t keep getting drunk and acting like you give a fuck about me.” Louis tells him, pushing the heel of his hand into his eye so hard bursts of colour appear behind his closed eyelid. “I know we said casual and I know I fucked it up by catching feelings or whatever, but it’s not fair of you to keep rubbing it in. Just leave me the fuck alone.”

He disconnects the call before Nick can say anything else, drops his phone on the mattress next to him. It’s cold in his room, the air conditioner humming quietly. Louis reaches over the side of the bed for his hoodie, putting it on before pulling his knees up and wrapping both arms around them. His phone goes off again but he ignores it, counts his own heartbeats instead, keeps doing it until he loses count. Two hours later he walks out into the kitchen to make himself a cup of tea, nauseated and dizzy from lack of sleep. 

He’s still sitting at the table, staring at the empty mug in front of him, when Harry comes stumbling out of his room at half seven. 

“Morning.” Harry says, yawning, clearly a little thrown by Louis’ presence this early in the morning.

“Hey,” Louis replies, cringing at the way his voice sounds.

“You’re up early.”

“So are you.”

“Going for a run before it gets too hot.” Harry explains, pulling a bottle of water out of the fridge. “What’s your excuse?”

Louis shrugs. It feels disjointed and awkward. He’s so tired. “Couldn’t sleep.”

“What, like, at all?” Harry frowns, nudging the door of the fridge shut with his elbow. “That’s rough, how come?”

Louis shrugs again, hates the way his eyes are beginning to burn and swallows hard before he speaks up again. “Nick called and, uh, woke me up. Didn’t manage to go back to sleep after that.”

“He called you?” Harry takes a seat opposite Louis at the table, unscrewing the cap and taking a swig. He sounds hopeful, almost, as if Nick calling Louis in the middle of the night would be a good thing. “When?”

“Around four.“ Louis tells him, looking at his empty mug instead of at Harry, poking the handle with his finger. “He was drunk.”

“What’d he say?”

Louis squeezes his eyes shut, willing the tears away. He hasn’t told Harry much about what went down between him and Nick, keeps wondering if Nick has said anything. “Doesn’t matter.” 

“Lou-”

“Leave it, Haz, please.” His voice breaks a little at the end, and he drags his palms roughly over his face. “Bloody hell, I’m so tired. Today is gonna suck.”

He can feel Harry watching him, and is surprised when all he says is, “More tea?”

Louis looks up then, finding Harry watching him with a hesitant smile.

“Please.”

Harry sets about making them both tea, telling Louis a rambling story his mum had told him yesterday about his cat back home. Louis listens silently, offering up a quiet ‘thanks’ when Harry puts a fresh mug of tea in front of him. Harry’s still making small talk as they sip their drinks. He’s telling a different story now. Or at least Louis thinks he is.

“I thought you were going for a run?” Louis interrupts him when the story seems to have come to an end. He has no idea what it was about, not really, hasn’t been paying attention.

Harry swirls the tea bag around inside his mug, then looks up with a small smile. “Nah, I’m good right here.”

Louis has the best friends.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

“You’re the worst.”

Louis points it out drily, picking the tank Liam just chucked at his head off of the floor, dropping it next to him on the bed.

“Come on, Louis.” Liam wheedles, already a little rosy cheeked from alcohol. He’s clutching a can of Keo, leaning heavily against Louis’ door. “It’s a Friday. Your last Friday here, I might add. You don’t really want to stay in, do you?”

Louis does, and he doesn’t. There’s a part of him that can’t wait to leave this island, who can’t think about going home to his mum and his siblings without his throat closing up. But there’s also a part that’s dying to stay just one more week, one more month. It’s not fair how Nick went and took so much fun out of his last weeks here. Because not only is Louis miserably, _ridiculously_ heartbroken, he’s also a little terrified about the prospect of bumping into Nick unprepared.

“Come on,” Liam says again, dragging out the last syllable. “We’re going to Helia.”

Louis pulls a face. “Yeah, not happening.”

“He’s not working tonight.”

Louis stills, hating the way his heart is pounding. “How do you know?” He doesn’t even bother pretending he doesn’t know who Liam is referring to.

“Harry checked.” Liam replies, looking so earnest Louis wants to throw a pillow at him. “Don’t let him ruin your last weekend here, okay?”

He already has, but Louis doesn’t point that out. There’s a part of him that wants to go out, wants to stop by Helia and say his goodbyes to Andreas. Wants to get drunk and drunker still and maybe forget all about Nick bloody Grimshaw for five fucking minutes. “Okay.”

Liam’s face lights up. “Yeah?” 

“I won’t say it again.”

Liam lets out a loud whoop, turning around to yell out into the flat. “Haz, he’s coming!”

Louis can feel his lip tug into a reluctant smile.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

An hour later they’re on their second pint and Louis is almost relaxed enough to enjoy it. Andreas had nearly teared up at the sight of him, wrapping him up in a bear hug, and it had helped but the whole bar is still a too good reminder of things he’d rather not think about. He’s mostly been pretending to be a part of the conversation, sick of the worried glances Harry keeps sending his way. He’s nodding along to something Liam’s saying, not paying attention, when he suddenly spots Nick over by the bar talking to Gia.

It’s like a punch to the gut.

Louis feels frozen to the spot, unable to take his eyes off Nick, fervently praying Harry or Liam won’t notice, both of them currently busy looking at something on Harry’s phone. He has a sip of beer to wet his parched throat, for a moment fearing he might actually drop his pint when Nick looks his way. Their eyes meet, briefly, and Louis can’t fucking breathe. Nick is the first to look away, turning his attention back to Gia. It hurts, but it also makes something in Louis’ chest ignite. Fuck Nick Grimshaw and his face and his heart and his stupid fucking hair.

Liam notices Nick ten minutes later, brows furrowing at the sight of him. “What’s he doing here?” He says, causing Harry to turn around to see who he’s talking about. “I thought you said he wasn’t working, Haz?”

“He isn’t.” Harry says, wide-eyed as he looks over at Louis. “I promise, Lou, he said he wasn’t.”

Louis wants to tell him it’s okay, but it’s really, really not. He shrugs, taking a long drag of his pint. Liam looks like he’s about to say something, so Louis interrupts him before he has the chance. “Shut up, Liam.”

“I wasn’t gonna say anything.”

“Yes you were.” Louis persists. “And since this whole thing was your idea you can buy the next round.”

Liam agrees with only minimal protest, a testament to how guilty he feels, Louis assumes. His eyes keep straying to Nick while they wait for Liam to return. Nick’s talking to some guy, leaning back against the bar on both elbows. He’s doing that thing he does when he’s flirting and throwing his head back as he laughs and suddenly Louis has had enough. If he has shown a severe lack of self-preservation the last few weeks, it’s coming back full force now. He has to leave. He drains the last of his pint, even though the lukewarm beer makes him feel a little sick, and then slams the glass down on the table. “I’m gonna go.”

“What?” Harry looks up from texting with his sister. “Now?”

“Yeah.” Louis replies tersely, getting to his feet and pocketing his phone.

“But Liam’s getting pints.”

“I have a headache.” Louis lies.

He can tell the moment Harry catches on, eyes drawn to Nick and the guy over at the bar. “Lou-”

“I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?” Louis forces a grin, silently begging Harry to let the subject drop. Harry does, and Louis walks briskly towards the doorway, refusing to turn and catch a final glimpse of Nick. Even though a part of him wants to. He’s halfway to the shop where Perrie and Jesy work, the street surprisingly empty, when he hears the sound of quickly approaching footsteps behind him.

“Louis.”

It’s Nick. Not knowing what to do with that fact, Louis simply ignores him and picks up his pace. He’s so done with this island and everything about it. A couple more days and then he’ll be home, far away from Nick fucking Grimshaw.

“Oi, Tomlinson!”

It’s so much louder this time, closer, and Louis whirls around. Nick jumps, clearly hadn’t been expecting him to actually turn around from the startled look on his face.

“What?” Louis spits, clenching his hands into fists inside his shorts.

“Where are you going?”

Louis has always thought the expression ‘seeing red’ was an exaggeration, but right now he might have to reconsider. He’s actually seething, wouldn’t be surprised if there was actual steam coming out of his ears. “Where does it fucking look like I’m going? Home!”

Nick looks chastised for a moment, pushes a hand through his hair before crossing his arms over his chest. But then he says, “Because I was talking to that guy? You and I are not a thing.”

Oh for fuck’s sake. “I bloody well know that, don’t I?” Louis bites back. It burns, Nick’s constant need to remind him of all the things he must have made up inside his head. It makes him feel small and silly and it’s not fair. “So why are you here right now? To rub it in my face? You’ve made it perfectly clear that you don’t like me and I’ll fucking get over it.” 

He really hopes he will. He’s so sick of walking around feeling like shit, and it’s only growing worse from knowing Nick doesn’t care. 

Nick makes an aborted move as if to reach out and touch him, and Louis takes an immediate step back, glaring at him. 

“I never promised you anything.” Nick says, and he really is acting like a broken record.

“No. You didn’t, as you so graciously keep reminding me.” Louis has to stop for a deep breath when he realises he’s close to yelling at Nick in the middle of the street. The only thing that could make this any worse would be to attract an audience of drunk tourists. “But don’t you _dare_ act like I don’t get to be upset. That’s not your decision to make. You treated me like shit.” His voice wobbles a little at the end, and Louis bites down on the inside of his cheek so hard it hurts. He will not cry in front of Nick.

Nick falters. “Sorry, that wasn’t-”

“Fucking hell. I don’t want sorry.” Louis grits out. I want you, you twat, he doesn’t say. “And why are you following me? Does it bother you that I’m not running after you like a bloody puppy anymore? Gotta have everyone’s attention, right? God forbid there’s one person in the room that doesn’t worship the ground you walk on, as long as they don’t expect anything in return.”

“That’s not it at all.”

“You’re so fucking selfish.” Louis spits, but then it hits him, “Actually, no. You’re not selfish. You’re just scared, and that makes it even sadder.”

“What are you going on about?”

“What am I going on about?” Louis sneers, voice dripping with sarcasm. It feels good, dulling some of the sharp edges of hurt. “All of this.” He throws a hand out. “The flat that still looks like you’ve just moved in, the job you don’t really want, the drinking, hooking up with twats.”

He has to stop for breath, but cuts Nick off when he opens his mouth to say something.

“You’re so fucking terrified, Nick, and of what? Growing attached to, fuck, anything?”

“Shut up.”

Nick looks angry, arms crossed over his chest. Louis doesn’t care, he’s angry too. 

“No. It’s like you’ve put yourself in exile and it’s-”

Nick cuts him off before he can finish. “Fuck you.”

Louis takes a step back, thrown off by the venom in Nick’s voice. All the fight drains out of him at once. He’s so tired. Tired of caring about someone who doesn’t want him to, who doesn’t appreciate it at all. He pulls a hand through his hair, pushing his fringe back. “Well, you already did that, didn’t you?” He says, laughing bitterly.

Nick’s anger seems to deflate a little, “Louis-“

“No, you know what?” Louis squares his jaw. “Fuck you too.”

He whips around, walking quickly, arms wrapped around his middle. Nick doesn’t follow him.

 

 

XOXO

 

 

“Malik!” Louis calls out, wiping the sweat from his brow. “Do you have my laptop charger?”

“No.” Zayn calls back, and Louis can hear him cursing under his breath. Zayn hates packing even more than Louis does, and they both have a lot of work left and they’re both hungover from last night’s leaving party down at the beach. Harry has fled the field, blaming drinks with a friend but in reality Louis thinks he’s hiding. He doesn’t blame him. They shouldn’t have left their packing to the last minute, but of course they have. They’re leaving with the same bus the guests are, before lunch tomorrow, and they’ve only just started packing up their rooms.

“Liar.” Louis replies, walking out of his room as the front door opens. “Hi Haz-” He cuts off at the sight of a tall, lean figure behind Harry in the doorway, and for a second he can only stare at the shape of Nick. When he recovers, he quickly slips inside Zayn’s room without another word, slamming the door shut behind him.

Zayn looks up from where he’d been making a poor attempt at folding up his clothes which are strewn in piles all over the floor. “Lou, I don’t think I have it, okay? I can’t-”

“Nick’s here.” Louis swallows. His heart is beating really loudly, he can feel it in his throat. He hasn’t seen Nick since he left him standing in the street, and that was three days ago.

Zayn’s on his feet in an instant. “He is?”

“With Harry.” Louis swallows, “Zayn-”

“I’ll tell him to leave, okay?” Zayn says, squeezing his arm as he glowers at the closed door. “I don’t know what the fuck Harry was thinking.”

Louis can only nod. He steps away from the door, allowing Zayn to slip out, then doesn’t know what to do with himself. His laptop charger is peeking out from under one of Zayn’s hoodies. He picks it up, twisting the cord around his hand. He can hear raised voices coming from the other side of the door. It should probably make him feel better, knowing Zayn has got his back, but it only makes it worse. He’s so sick of fighting and feeling like shit. When he hears Zayn raise his voice further, he decides that it’s enough.

He opens the door, finding Zayn with his back to Louis. Nick’s still right inside the front door, hovering awkwardly behind Harry.

“This is a shit move, Harry.” Zayn is telling Harry, then turns his attention towards Nick. “Didn’t I tell you to fuck off, Grimshaw? Get out!”

“Zayn, that’s-”

“Can I talk to you?” Nick looks behind Zayn, right at Louis, interrupting Harry. 

Louis doesn’t know what to say. Nick looks sad, a downward tilt to his mouth that reminds Louis of when they were at the beach. That expression on his face that Louis never wanted to see again.

“No, you bloody can’t.” Zayn snaps, turning towards Louis. “Come on, Lou, let’s-”

“Two minutes. Please.”

“Okay.” Louis says, and he’s not sure which one out of the four of them is more surprised. “Two minutes.”

“Are you sure?” Zayn murmurs, throwing another glare at Nick over his shoulder.

“It’s okay,” Louis tells him, quietly.

“Alright.” Zayn agrees, speaking softly so only Louis can hear. “If you’re sure?”

He’s really not, but nods anyway.

“Lou-” Harry speaks up when he walks past him, but Louis shakes his head. He doesn’t want to talk to Harry right now. It was a bit of a shit move, bringing Nick here, and Louis might be okay with talking to Nick, getting some closure if nothing else, but it still hurts. Harry’s supposed to be on Louis’ side.

“You coming?” He directs the question to Nick, and then continues inside his own bedroom without checking to see if Nick follows him. 

The room is just as messy as it was three minutes ago, and he dumps the charger on a pile of shorts on the floor. When he looks up Nick is in the doorway, looking at the mess on the floor.

“Harry told me you’re leaving tomorrow.”

“Yeah.” Louis replies, nudging the corner of his suitcase with his toe. 

“You must be excited to see your family.” Nick says, closing the door behind him after a moment of visible hesitation.

Louis nods. Twenty-four hours from now he’ll be back in Doncaster and it’s mind boggling. He’s going to see his mum and his siblings and he can’t wait. “Is that what you wanted to talk about?”

Nick shakes his head but then takes a moment to reply, playing with the charms on his necklace. Louis steals a glimpse at him, watching the way his Adam’s apple moves as he swallows. 

“I’m sorry.”

Louis crosses his arms over his chest, levels Nick with a challenging look. “What for?”

“I was shit to you.” Nick explains, quietly. His eyes are dark when he looks up at Louis.

“You were.” Louis agrees, and it’s true, but it still makes something in his chest twist uncomfortably seeing Nick upset.

“Someone told me I was being an arsehole because I was scared. I thought I’d try and be brave for once.”

Louis winces, remembering his own, scathing words. “And?”

“I freaked out. It’s not an excuse, I know, but-” Nick pauses to draw in a deep breath. He shifts his weight, looking Louis straight in the eye as he continues, “Wanting things, like, really wanting them, haven’t worked out that well for me in the past but, fuck, I want you. I’m so in love with you.” 

Louis’ breath catches. Nick likes him back. Nick, who’s in Louis bedroom, looking at him like he’s something precious. His head is spinning with all the memories from a few nights ago and everything that happened before that. Nick telling him to leave. Nick kissing him behind Helia. Nick on the beach, buzzed and laughing. His heart feels too big, like it might not fit inside his chest. He sits down on the bed, distractedly pushing a pile of t-shirts to the floor to make room.

“You told me you love me.” Nick says, quickly.

Louis nods, dumbly. “I did.”

“Did you mean it?”

Confused, Louis looks up at Nick. Nick’s biting his lower lip, teeth digging into the skin, holding himself like he’s bracing himself for Louis’ answer. He waits until Nick lifts his gaze, looking him in the eyes, and then nods again.

Nick visibly relaxes when Louis nods, shoulders sagging. Louis shifts on the bed, silently inviting Nick to sit down next to him. Nick does, picking at the frayed hem on his shorts. His voice is hoarse when he speaks next, voice pitched low. “I’m not...okay, I think. I’m like, taped together, still. I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing.” He laughs, but there’s no humor in his voice, “I don’t want to hurt you. Didn’t. I know that much. You’re the best thing that’s happened to me in years.”

Louis has no idea what to say, his tongue feeling glued to the roof of his mouth. It’s a lot. Too much. Nick’s in love with him.

“I don’t even know where I’m going with this.” Nick says, smiling ruefully when Louis chuckles weakly, overwhelmed. “I wanted to apologise before you left. I really am sorry.”

“Okay.” Louis nods. He hasn’t quite got it in him to voice his forgiveness, can’t really tell up from down with the storm of emotion raging in his chest. Brimming with a nervous kind of energy he gets to his feet, ends up by the window with his back to Nick. It’s as sunny as it always is outside, a car driving by down on the road. Louis turns around to find Nick watching him silently, arms crossed over his chest.

Louis doesn’t know where this leaves them. He’s leaving tomorrow. Fuck. “I don’t know what to say.” He admits, hating the way Nick’s face falls slightly before he can hide it.

“That’s okay.” Nick says, brushing a hand through his hair, offering Louis a wry smile. “Could I text you, maybe? When you’re back home?”

“Yes.” Louis replies, quickly. He wants that. This awkward conversation can’t be their last. He feels stripped bare, too raw, needs a moment to catch his breath. “I have a lot of packing to do so…” He regrets the words as soon as they are out but there’s no taking them back now.

“Right, yeah, of course.” Nick nods, getting to his feet. “I should go.”

Louis’ chest clenches. “Can I have a hug?”

Nick looks completely floored for a second, like he’s barely breathing. “Please.”

Louis opens his arms as Nick walks up to him, enveloping him in a hug and burying his face in Nick’s neck. Nick’s arms wraps around his back, pulling him closer. It’s familiar and perfect and Louis might not get to do this again. He’s suddenly desperate for a few more days, a week. Enough time to figure out what this all means. If they could actually make something good out of all of it with all the cards on the table. His eyes are burning and he squeezes them shut, fists a hand in Nick’s t-shirt. Nick’s shaking a little, and Louis can hear him exhale unevenly against the top of his head.

“Fuck,” Nick chuckles, scrubbing a hand over his face roughly when they finally pull apart. “I might miss you a little when you leave, Tomlinson. Don’t let it go to your head.”

“Too late.” Louis’ attempt at flippancy is a joke. He doesn’t care. His hands are shaking. “I knew you’d come around to my charm, Grimshaw.”

“Wanker.” Nick laughs wetly.

Louis’ smile probably looks more like a pained grimace. “Knob.”

 

 

XOXO

 

 

 

 

XOXO

 

 

 

 

XOXO

 

 

**THREE MONTHS LATER.**

November in England is brutal. Louis squints against the rain as he jogs down the stairs, heading for the bus stop, missing the sun and warmth so much it’s like a physical ache. It’s a Friday afternoon, and Louis is so ready for a weekend of minimal work and lots of sleep. He has some stuff he needs to go over for one of his modules, but other than that he’s looking forward to having a few pints and lazing around the flat. He might Skype Harry later, find out how he’s enjoying Thailand. He tugs at the hood of his jacket, trying to avoid any unnecessary contact with the elements. He walks briskly across campus but still ends up having to sprint the last bit to the bus stop. 

He is the last one to step onboard the bus and there are no seats left, so he ends up squashed in between a pram and a man in his fifties who is talking loudly on his phone, pulling faces at the cranky toddler in the pram before his phone pings with an incoming message. He struggles to retrieve his phone from the pocket of his damp jeans, finding a text from Stan.

_U still in class?_

_On the bus now_ , Louis texts back, bottom lip caught between his teeth. They had lucked out, him and Stan, finding a flat not too far from campus that they could actually afford. Sure, they both need to work extra to be able to afford it, but it’s worth it.

It’s still raining when he steps off the bus, and he jogs the short distance from the bus stop to their building. It doesn’t help much; he’s still damp from the rain when he walks through the door, grimacing at the soggy state of his beanie.

“Hiya.” He calls out, stepping out of his soaked Vans. He’s shrugging out of his coat when a voice cuts through the flat, making his heartbeat double in his chest.

“Hi.”

Louis spins around, mouth dropping open. It’s Nick. Right there, in Louis’ tiny living room, sat on the sofa. Stan’s there too, waving to Louis before disappearing inside his bedroom, shutting the door behind himself.

“Hey.” Louis gets out, absentmindedly hanging his coat on one of the overflowing hooks by the door. Nick’s there. He looks taller than Louis remembers him. Tanned. Louis has missed him so much. “You’re here.”

“I am.” Nick nods, wiping his hands on his thighs as he gets to his feet.

“In my flat.”

“Yep.” Nick nods again, shoving both hands into the front pocket on his hoodie. “Stan let me in, I hope it’s okay.” His hair is a little shorter than it was over the summer. “I’m, uh, back. I moved back.”

“Oh, that’s…” Louis heart is beating really fast, pounding against his ribs. He drops his bag to the floor. Nick’s right there. He swallows tightly, fingers itching to touch. “That’s cool. Your family must be happy.”

“They are.” Nick agrees, a barely there twitch of his lip. He looks happy at the thought. “What about you?”

Louis blinks, confused. “What about me?”

“Are you happy to see me too?”

He is. Louis can feel his face crumble, nodding furiously.

“Well, then, can I have a hug?” Nick smiles, quirks a brow, throwing Louis’ words back at him like it hasn’t been three months since he said them. Like it hasn’t been three months since they last saw each other and Louis has spent all that time missing him.

Louis practically flies across the room, crashing into Nick. He buries his face in Nick’s neck, smiling against the soft fabric of his hoodie as Nick wraps his arms around him, pulling him closer.

“You didn’t tell me.” Louis mumbles, clinging to Nick. He’d texted Nick after a week back on home soil, a simple ‘I forgive you btw’, and he had meant it. They’ve texted sporadically since but it’s been hard, a little awkward. Both of them too aware of the weird limbo they left things in to go much further than shallow small talk.

“I wanted to have things sorted first,” Nick replies. Louis can feel his breath against the top of his head. “Had a meeting with the advisor today, and then I came straight here.”

“What?” Louis pulls back enough to look Nick in the eyes, barely daring to get his hopes up. Maybe he understood it all wrong. “You’re going back to uni? Here?”

“I am.” Nick nods, eyes sparkling. “I have to resit a couple of exams in January, but if I pass them all I can come back.”

They break apart, both taking a half step back but Louis is reluctant to let go. He wants to keep touching Nick, doesn’t think he could ever get too close. 

“I’m so happy for you.”

Nick looks so pleased and Louis is still so, so in love with him. 

“Thank you.” Nick smiles, then pulls a face. “I’m gonna have to work my bloody ass off revising.”

“Do you have somewhere to stay?”

“I’m staying with my mum and dad in Oldham until I can find something up here. My mum was pretty excited to have me back but I think she’ll regret letting me stay once she remembers how messy I am.”

“They’ve missed you.” Louis points out, “I’m sure they’re thrilled to have you back home for a while.”

Nick blushes. “Yeah.”

“So we’ll be uni mates.” Louis grins, can’t keep the smile off his face. 

“Looks like it.” Nick quips, but then turns serious. “Are we okay?”

“We are.” Louis tells him, says it again when Nick only quirks a brow in question. “We’re okay, promise.”

Nick pulls in a deep breath, visibly bracing himself for something. “Then can I buy you a pint sometime?”

“No.” 

Nick’s face falls, and Louis scrambles for an explanation. “I mean, yes, sure, it’s just… I’d rather you kiss me instead?” It comes out sounding like a question, “I think I’ve waited long enough… unless, sorry, was I -” Louis would kick himself if he could.

“No!” Nick reaches for his hand, lacing their fingers together. “No, that sounds -”

“Yeah?” Louis couldn’t keep from smiling if he got paid to.

“Yeah.” Nick’s smiling too, eyes crinkling at the corners. “Yes. I would like that very much.”

For a moment they simply stand there, grinning at each other. Louis is the first one to break the silence. “So are you gonna get to it any time soon?” He jokes, laughing, tugging playfully at the front pocket on Nick’s hoodie. “Like I said, I’ve waited a long ass time for you, Grimshaw, and _you’re_ not exactly getting any younger-”

Nick cuts him off with a kiss.

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

>  
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> 
> Thanks for reading <3 
> 
> Kudos and comments are greatly appreciated and make my day every time xx
> 
> Come say hi to me on [tumblr](http://camiii.tumblr.com/) ?


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